I think my partner is no longer in love with me, advice?

4 Comments

when we first started dating just over 2 years ago everything was great. we connected on a real spiritual and emotion level. I could not imagine my life could be any better. there was also a great chemistry going on (not going into details but you get the idea).

today things are the same in respect to the emotional and spiritual connection. I still love my partner more then anything and I know they feel the same about me, however I think that love is gradually becoming a more we used to date but now we are friends kinda love. I could be wrong, that is why I decided to ask a bunch of strangers for advice.

my partner is still so supportive of me and always there when I need a cuddle. however, that chemistry I mentioned early is completely gone, well at least on their end. we are no longer intimate in that way despite me making it obvious that I crave that type of intimacy. my partner is always making excuses as to why we cant.... (you get the idea) the main excuse is always im tired or im in pain. yet when I say take a pain killer they wont or when they do they go straight to sleep.
I really don't know how to deal with this as my partner tells me multiple times a day how much they love me.
I really dont know what to make of it all. im past the age where I can deal with bullshit from my partners. at this point, I just want honestly but I another way im afraid to conform and upset them if im just over reacting. I would really appreciate advice on this. thanks

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Comments ( 4 )
  • e51pegasi
    5 years ago

    To me it sounds like you have passed the honeymoon phase of your relationship & after two years you are going to know each other fairly well. After the honeymoon phase, the sex-fuelled period of discovery & excitement dissipates. People become comfortable with each other, as well as occasionally taking each other for granted. It can become rather tedious. Where to eat, which movie to go & see, stretching wages out until next month. I've seen twentysomethings in shops literally screaming at each other about what flavour of cup-a-soup to buy & think what is it going to be like for them in twenty years if that kind of 'fun' has started already.

    Couple's sex lives can & do go down the pan after a while when you have explored each other from head to toe & you know what your lover likes & dislikes. When he is feeling in the mood have you tried spicing things up a little or being a little impulsive? I've always found a little impromptu, al fresco sex worked magic in that circumstance. Especially in the springtime.

    What usually kills relationships stone dead is a lack of communication. Have you asked him if he still feels the same way as you do & told him what you have told us? Why not ask him what is wrong & if he can you see the two of you having a long-term future.

    People change, relationships evolve. Sometimes relationships just run their course, no one is at fault. They just fizzle out & no matter how much people try or want them to flourish it simply isn't meant to be.

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    • Ellenna
      5 years ago

      Great response: I wish I'd written that! It's a common mistake (and I've done it myself when much younger) to assume that when the "in love" phase begins to fade the relationship is no longer worth hanging on to. Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn't, but the fading of the first mad passion doesn't necessarily mean it's all over, it's just changed, hopefully to something more solid and lasting.

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  • feet4ever
    5 years ago

    Pretty good advice from all of the above minus the one person who said that they are getting sex from someone else

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  • curious-bunny
    5 years ago

    A beautiful article that just might help you. It helped me.

    http://aminoapps.com/p/yjodio

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