I need help but how

77% Normal
9 Comments

I was with the love of my love for 4 1/2 years , i helped her raise here 5 year old daughter from 6 months old , we were engaged & just moved into a flat to save for a new house , heres where it all started 2 weeks after moving in she left me , i havnt seen the little girl since and rarely get to talk to my ex ( we have bills together that i try n sort out with her ).we have now been apart for 3 months

My problem is every day i think of her constantly , i find myself saying "no i wont text her" but i constantly do i rarely get an answer back but i still do it, every time the phone rings i jump thinking its her but its not , i drive around in the hope i'm going to run into her , i go to the places we used to always go , i've been trying so hard not to do these types of things but i end up doing it , i cant seem to stop it & its effecting myself as a person ( i also have a 5 year old son who i sometimes avoid cause he's always asking for them and dosnt understand, i want to be a better dad to him) i go through stages of anger , fear & sadness daily is this normal or do i need serious help?

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77% Normal
Based on 31 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • imnotbad
    12 years ago

    im trying my hardest to be that dad but im not succeeding well at it , who know someone who i truely love could mess me up so bad

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  • karmasAbich
    12 years ago

    Be the dad you need to be. Your son doesn't understand so he needs you more than ever.

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  • imnotbad
    12 years ago

    i do thankyou for trying to help your words mean alot , i live in a rural comunity with nothing around me so i'm trapped with all the memories & places around me , i've been locking myself in a dark room to avoid the world but now im starting to go wierd, get strange thoughts & hear voices . this cant be normal i feel as though the light at the other end is starting to take my soul

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    • Avant-Garde
      12 years ago

      You're welcome.

      I live in the suburbs, but my fears keep me inside my house. I don't do things unless necessary.... The only peace of mind I can attain is when I go to the city. When I'm there, I can forget my problems and be myself. But I don't often get to go and even when I do I don't always feel free. The only thing know how to do is to just wallow in my pain and misery....

      I have gotten the strange thoughts & voices, usually when I'm extremely stressed out or feeling suicidal. I guess it's not normal...

      A friend of mine, recently told me that darkness can't exist without light and vice-versa. Like Ying and Yang. I guess the best thing to do is try to find a balance between the two.

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  • imnotbad
    12 years ago

    im just trying to find out where do i go from here , how do you make yourself live n forget so you can move forward

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    • Avant-Garde
      12 years ago

      I've honestly never been with anyone before, but I have had my heart broken...

      Try to do things that make you happy. Whenever, I'm feeling depressed or suicidal, I make art and write poetry.

      They somehow manage to help fill in my voids. They don't permanently solve my problems, but they do help to make sense of things. Share your art.
      All this time, I've been afraid to share my work, which is basically keeping my feelings bottled up. It's never a good thing to keep all of that emotion to yourself. I'm still afraid, but I know I need to do it. I need to express myself and hopefully find people that understand what I'm going through.

      Do you get what I'm saying?

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  • imnotbad
    12 years ago

    I would like to just move on but thats my problem my brain goes one way and my body goes the other i'm trapped & dont know what to do about it. I miss as i say my daughter but have no legal rights to her even though i helped raise her and she was calling me dad etc i love her just as much as my own son.

    i would have loved to work things out but she has hurt my family dearly with the way she removed her ( our daughter) from my family who always treated her like our own , things would never be the same again

    i just dont really know what or where i am suppose to go from here , i went to councilling still do but it dosnt change anything , i think i'm broken and at my end of what i can handle , i was a strong person but now i just dont want to wake up

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  • Avant-Garde
    12 years ago

    It sounds like your love life is causing you to be depressive. The things that hurt us most often makes us long for them. She broke your heart. There are way better ways to do that and it seems she did none of them.
    Perhaps, she got scared and felt like things were moving too fast. But the least she could of done was tell you her feelings. Maybe, things could've been sorted out if she allowed you to talk them out.

    Your sadness from this relationship is causing you to want to find her and sort things out. Maybe, she's avoiding you, because she feels you aren't giving her any space and are becoming obsessive. You try to talk to her but it doesn't seem to be working. Perhaps, the only way to sort things out is counseling or too just move on? I know it's hard and I know you love her dearly, but some things aren't meant to be.... You'll both have to make a decision: Get to the bottom of things and see if there's still hope or to just end it....

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  • sunny_wantsome
    12 years ago

    you mean you miss the baby girl

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