I miss my ex boyfriends kids but not my ex boyfriend, iin?

95% Normal
12 Comments

I broke up with my ex boyfriend because he was abusive to me. I dated him for a year and a half. He had full custody of his kids who are 12 and 14. I miss them so much as I kind of felt like their mom. They didnt have a Mom because she left when the youngest was two so my ex had full custody so I was around them all of the time. I feel so bad because my ex was always very mean to them and I feel like he didnt deserve his kids. He treated them like property rather then children. I wish that when I left I could have taken his kids with me but I have no legal rights I know I could have treated them better then he does and it frusturates me. Is it normal that I miss them so much when they werent my kids. I cry about it all the time and nobody understands and they tell me that I shouldnt be crying because they were just a couple of kids I met for a year. But to me it seemed like so much more than that and I felt like their Mom. Is it normal that Im depressed about missing someone elses kids?

Voting Results
95% Normal
Based on 73 votes (69 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 12 )
  • BurnaBaby27
    12 years ago

    Awww :{, that's terrible. Maybe you should try calling CPS..if you really want to get involved. They might give you custody of them. But I think it's completely normal. You bonded with them and you care about them. Makes total sense to me.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
      -
    • Sammy245
      12 years ago

      Thank you for understanding what Im going through. Its nice just to have someone understand instead of telling me that I have no reason to be upset because they werent my own kids. I wanted to keep talking to them and stay in there life but my ex said the only way I could do that is if I got back together with him. He also made them delete me from there facebook and messaged me telling me that if I didnt want to be in his life I couldnt be in his kids. He was trying to use them to control me which I think is sick to use kids for manipulation. I almost want to go back to him because I miss his kids so bad but I cant stand him touching me or kissing me because he is such a bad person. Its just really hard because I am sooo worried about them. I dont think I would be as upset if I felt like they were with someone who was a normal human being but I feel like I left them with a complete psycho path. Now that Im gone I feel like all of his abuse is going to be completely focused on them now instead of me taking some of it sometimes. I just feel so guilty... I feel like I saved myself and left them hanging there to deal with his insanity. It kills me thinking about what might be going on... I was always there to stop it when things got bad and Im not there anymore. I remember once he started hitting one of his kids (not that hard but it was still mean) because his kid was eating his chips too loudly. I would always stop him from acting crazy and jump in the middle stopping him. I am just worried. People think its also weird that I felt like their Mom because Im only 24 years old and they are older children.. I just dont know what to do and it is nice just to have somone listen to me. I know the kids loved me because they told me so and I just walked out on them... I thought about keeping in contact with them secretly as they have their own phones but my ex is crazy and if he catches me contacting them secretley he might try to lie and get me in trouble with the police saying something that isnt true so I wont do that. I know the kids also wont try to contact me because if they get caught talking to me when they were told not to they will get in alot of trouble. I think I might call CPS but I dont know, that is a drastic thing to do but thank you for the thought. I know the kids would rather live with me because they cant stand him.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
        -
      • BurnaBaby27
        12 years ago

        Of course! You have every right to be upset! I think the right thing to do is to get CPS involved. I know it's drastic, but you seem really concerned about their well-being, and this is something that is completely out of your control. You need assistance in getting them out of there and those are the people who can help. I'm sure things could remain anonymous as well, so their father wouldn't need to know that you were the person who called.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
        1
        1
          -
        • Sammy245
          12 years ago

          Thanks :)

          Comment Hidden ( show )
          0
          0
  • pandabear1209
    12 years ago

    Same happened to me, I don't miss my ex but I miss his kid like crazy.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • Sammy245
      12 years ago

      Glad somebody can relate to what I am goin through.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • Faceless
    12 years ago

    You should murder him and kidnap the kids. That will solve everything.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • Sammy245
      12 years ago

      Hahahahaha, I needed to laugh thanks lol. Just so everybody knows I won't do that though but its still funny lol.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
        -
      • XxBlackSheepxX
        12 years ago

        Yaaaa you "won't do that, just so everybody knows, and I still have an alibi to get away with murder" ;) i got ya

        Comment Hidden ( show )
        0
        0
          -
        • Sammy245
          12 years ago

          lolol

          Comment Hidden ( show )
          0
          0
  • vintage_blonde
    9 years ago

    OMG this is how I feel at the moment! So glad I'm not the only one! :)

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • sumrandomguy
    12 years ago

    you have no blood ties anymore and thus no reason to show interest into their lives. Make a family of your own if possible. its called jealousy and biological clock is ticking. Be bold try meeting a mate and fulfill one of humans main reason to live to pass on your bloodline.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    -2
    -2