I'm ugly and i don't know how to cope

I hate to ask, but I honestly do not know where I would be on a scale. I've been called ugly all my life by peers and even family. I've never been in a relationship and whenever I tried for one, it always ended up awkward and destroying my confidence altogether. I have not asked out a girl in about 3 years now. I'm 21 and inexperienced in every social aspect because I believe that I am too ugly to even have friends. Life has taught me this. Is there a way that it's all in my head or am I truly ugly and life isn't fair, but there's a way to cope with it? I read that being alone per day is the same as smoking 12 cigarettes per day. If that's the case I've been smoking since I was born and being alone has come to physically hurt. My chest is in pain quite a lot like it's tense or feels like a huge weight is on it. I don't know what to do.
http://www.hostingpics.net/viewer.php?id=96919920150603193351975Original.jpg
This website doesn't allow me to post pics.

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Comments ( 48 )
  • You look absolutely normal to me. It's your attitude that needs to be adjusted not your looks. If you approach interactions with people (male or female) like you did this post that's the reason people aren't falling over themselves to be around you.

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  • RoseIsabella

    There's nothing wrong with you, my friend.

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  • Darkoil

    You're not ugly but you just look normal. Build a decent body, get a deep tan, get a decent hair cut and get rid of that facial hair as it's not doing you any favours.

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    • WardenOfFate

      I just got a hair cut in that pic. There's no way to dress my hair and the facial hair makes my face look not comedically round.

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      • His advice regarding getting in shape is good. If you start an exercise routine and stick to it I think it will greatly improve your outlook on life and overall well being.

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  • VinnyB

    I want to clarify my statement by saying that I think most people use these scales wrong. If the scale is 1 - 10 then five should be average. But I always here people say that someone is just a 6 or something like that is bad, when to me, you should only rate someone a 6 if you think they are above average looking.

    With this in mind, I would rate you a 5, meaning I think you are completely average looking. I rate most people in this range, because most people are average, and that's what makes it average. There are tons of people who would be satisfied with an average looking person.

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    • BadPuns

      Exactly.

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  • SerialSinner

    You look so fine to me, and I bet you have a beautiful smile :)

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  • Ellenna

    I haven't bothered to look at your picture because your isolation has nothing whatsoever to do with your appearance. The people who've contributed all this advice on how to improve your appearance are well meaning but they miss the point, which is that it doesn't matter what you look like, it's how you feel about yourself.

    We all know people who aren't particularly physically attractive but have friends and lovers and we all know beautiful ones who have neither: take a look around the real world and you'll see what I mean.

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    • WardenOfFate

      I live out on Long Island where the basis for having a relationship circles around good looks and money.

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      • Ellenna

        Hmmm, sounds boring and superficial. Surely not everyone there is like that? If so I'd either move or find more fulfilling friendship circles elsewhere

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  • wistfulmaiden

    I don't find you ugly. But you don't look happy. A big part of being attractive is charm humor and smiling. I know few ugly guys who I'd still date cause they are attractive in other ways. If you don't feel confidence fake it.

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    • WardenOfFate

      http://img11.hostingpics.net/pics/40737920150608132104713Beautified.jpg

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      • wistfulmaiden

        See you look good on this pic cause you're smiling. Don't let anybody put you down not even you:)

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  • ReginaFalange

    I have a friend who is very ugly, like objectively ugly. But she has such confidence in herself that people don't really notice that. To the point that she even had an ex who would stalk her for a while!
    She's intelligent, friendly, fun to be around, etc. Beauty has a lot to do with attitude.
    (also bear in mind that society is much more judgemental with a woman's looks, so you will have it easier already)
    You have a much better face than she had to start with, you are not even ugly!
    Stop thinking about that, instead concentrate in the things that make you unique, like what you are good at or your favourite hobbies, focus on your self confidence.
    Someone said in the comments that you need to smile. That's exactly what it is, when you smile your face shows the beauty from inside, and that makes any face automatically prettier :) <- this comment is prettier already

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  • Holzman_67

    hey man you'd be alot better looking if you smile, and get a hairstylist.
    But even so, you aint ugly! Stop believing that when people tell you that and stop telling yourself that!
    for gods sake man just stop it!!

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  • sillygirl77

    You're not ugly. You look good!

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  • ______________

    You look exactly like Frieddie Mercury!
    And you aren't bad looking. Wear dark clothes, get some sideburn-beard going, and shave off your hair. It would compliment you nicely.
    And you won't believe what being on form does to the face. Exercise, exercise, exercise my friend. And don't forget confidence.
    After that, you won't have trouble getting chicks so long as you have a nice personality.

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  • anti-hero

    Normal looking. But the facial hair is too well manicured. Shave it all off or grow a full beard. The tight goatee went out 10-12 years ago.

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  • slings_and_arrows

    There's plenty of women who would think you're nice looking/hot. Especially if you had nice clothes on and looked happier.

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  • kingofcarrotflowers

    I know it shouldn't but it Always irks me when people more attractive than me call themselves ugly

    You look fine! You look like a normal guy :)

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  • You don't look ugly at all. Infact I don't even agree with most people here, I think you look better than average or have potential to. People may not like what I'm going to say here but you look better than half the people on here from what I've seen when viewing it from a 1 to 10 scale, male and female.

    My advice would be that you do something with your hair first. It looks like it's thinning so I don't know if there's much you can do about that. See if there's ways to make it look thicker. If that fails then perhaps you should shave it off. I think you've got some pretty good facial features to pull off the shaved head look.

    Keep the beard in my opinion but tidy it up. Cut off that but that's connecting the hair on the side of your chin to your moustach so that your moustach stops just a little above the side of your mouth. Then shave the thin facial hair at the side of your chin beard area. Makes it look neater and less scruffy.

    I'm assuming you took this picture at work so I can't say not to wear orange but also look for clothing that compliments your skin colour, I'd say darker shaded clothing.

    I personally think you'd look even better with what I explained above, and if not you can simply grow it back. I still don't get how people are saying you look normal/average. You've got a good set of eyes.

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    • VinnyB

      If he looks better than half the people here, then doesn't that mean he looks equally as good or worse than half the people, and wouldn't that equal average?

      Not putting him down, he is better looking than me, but still average.

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  • Werstagen

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    Man, you look normal, you haven't seen me, that's why I'm laughing, I'd love to look like you.
    Too ugly to have friends? Wtf?
    I understand that girls might turn you down, you don't exactly look like David Beckham, but you're absolutely average, plenty of guys like you end up with very desireable chicks.

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  • mokuton

    This is a fucking troll, probably not is real picture even.

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  • mystery7

    There's nothing wrong with how you look at all. You look good man. There's nothing wrong with you physically. I know you don't believe that, but it sounds like life and circumstances has somehow brainwashed you to into believing the opposite.

    What you need is to get your self unbrainwashed. Perhaps look into psychological therapy. I too used to think I was ugly. I look back on pictures of myself at that time and realise it was not true at all. It's hard to break out of that thinking but its important you find a way.

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  • HelloAgain

    Beauty is nothing but symmetry and proportion. You look perfectly symmetrical and everything is where it should be, therefore, you are not ugly. In all honesty, I feel you already knew that though.

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  • WardenOfFate

    I can't tell if anybody is getting my replies because the website keeps getting rid of them.

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  • Goomats

    1. Quit looking so mopey.
    2. Quit wearing the prison-colored shirt.
    3. Work on your social life.
    4. Stop thinking you're ugly.
    5. Work on your social skills.

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  • Koda

    You're good looking. Blame your social issues on your personality! JK. In all seriousness, you're good looking AND you deserve friends, but not because of your looks, but because you seem like a good, honest person. You have nice lips, a nice nose, and nice eyes. Everything else is just style, and you can change that to suit your mood.

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  • Cats

    Average looking, definitely not ugly.

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  • Arm0se

    I fucking hate it when people are like "meeeeeennnnnn I'm su uglaaaay" and their more beautiful than I am >.>

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  • daydreamer394

    ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'm sorry you have such jealous peers (I'm presuming), because you aren't ugly, you're not even average, you're very handsome.
    I know how you feel though, about being alone. However, I am truly ugly.

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  • noid

    You're not ugly. I've seen way uglier people. You look normal to me.

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  • chained_rage

    You look normal.. just.. that beard.. shave it off but leave the lip strip.. make the sideburns shorter and shave off all your hair. You'll look badass.

    But dude.. the confidence issues.. not good. Wear yellow shirts and smile at yourself in the mirror

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  • VirgilManly

    I wouldn't mind looking like you.

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  • Shrunk

    Are you that guy that posted vids of yourself before? not that you're ugly, just similar writing style

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    • WardenOfFate

      I wouldn't post a vid. I hate the sound of my voice.

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      • Cuntsiclestick

        Dude, you're not ugly. You're actually pretty average looking which is not a bad thing.

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      • Shrunk

        oh okay. and you don't look bad in that pic. def not 'ugly' as far as i can tell

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  • sugartits

    you look like a child molester

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    • Cuntsiclestick

      Oh come on sugartits behave yourself.
      :)

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      • sugartits

        sorry mom

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        • Cuntsiclestick

          Good titty. Now go run off and play. Mommy needs to go eat some snacks.

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          • sugartits

            i want cannolis and funnel cake

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            • Cuntsiclestick

              None for you!

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    • WardenOfFate

      I've been told this once.

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      • 匚卄尺口爪モ╰☆╮匚工匕丹刀モㄥ

        I personally think the people around you saying you're ugly or a child molester got problems themselves. I think you look like a normal guy that could probably get a girlfriend very easily. Just have confidence in yourself. You're not ugly.

        Btw, don't mind sugartits. He/she is a troll. Lol

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