I'm twenty years old and never had a girlfriend

Hi
I just turned twenty and have never had a girlfriend. It could possibly be caused by my shyness; i don't really approach women in, say, bars or clubs. It's sort of became that thing where, as time goes on, I just get more and more scared of the idea of rejection and humiliation (heavily influenced by paranoia and severe self conscious).
I just don't want it to get any worse as i really want someone to be with. And i'm not even talking about sex (even though i am a virgin). I just want someone i can love and share common interests, to hold and cherish and spoil.
It just seems like these wishes are slipping through my fingers as I grow older and my confidence plummets.
Is it normal to feel this way and if so how do I get out of the hole I seem to be digging

Voting Results
75% Normal
Based on 53 votes (40 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Canon12

    Don't know what you look like but you need some confidence building changes in your life. New clothes, new hair style and some guidance from someone your admire as the way you would like to be. Get interested in something where there are people; hiking clubs, skating, swimming, literary clubs, dancing, vacation groups...anything to get you going. You have 3/4th of your life remaining and you better start now.

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  • roxandham

    Have you tried looking online ? I know this can help people who are afraid of actually approaching people. It's not a lost cause so don't worry. You just need some confidence boost. What do you like about yourself? Make those your strength

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  • shuggy-chan

    20 years old? No girlfriend? You are doomed!!! Your family line will end with you, get a head start and buy 5 cats

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  • Somkin76

    My wife had a co-worker very nice young man very polite very shy and she was very hot he didn't have a car so she would give him a ride home after work she could tell sometimes he would see up her skirt and get aroused she felt sorry for him I told her when we talked about it go ahead make his day the day she decided to go in his house after work his mother had to unexpectedly showed up she never did get around after that to deflower him if he only knew how close he was he would probably be hating this mother she never got another chance as he moved away

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  • Terence_the_viking

    Oh weell i got married at 24 didn't want a girlfriend they were allbitches.

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  • BareClaire

    First you have to love yourself and who you are as a person.
    A girl loves nothing more than a man with self confidence and a little healthy pride in himself.

    If you feel self doubt then that is what you are also projecting to us women. Dress in atire that you feel sharp and cofident in, drive a car that makes you feel proud and that you love.
    Be yourself though. For example.
    If you like the 1950's gangster style then buy a 1950's car and a pin stripe suit and hat and go to car meets etc. There you are likely to find a rockabilly chick who digs the same things you do and loves you for you.

    Just do what makes you happy in life and get out amongst the people. You wont meet the perfect girl in here reading replies on your PC screen.

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  • Tealights

    You're fine.

    Work on your confidence/self-esteem first, and use common sense. Understand that rejection is apart of life; so when you do put yourself out there, expect a few people to say no for any number of reasons (most are stupid btw, so don't dwell on it). However, don't let the word "no" ruin your life, because women are just people, they shouldn't define who you are.

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  • mysistersshadow

    Its not normal but it probly won't be fatal either. If you never approach women how are going to meet them wait for them to come knocking at your door to see if there are any lonely guys lurking inside?

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