I'm tired of spending money on my gf!

87% Normal
21 Comments

I'm 21 and in my third year of college. I've been working since I was 16 and full time, living on my own since 18. I make little above minimum wage but enough to have a small disposable income, my own place and a car.

My GF is 21 and has only ever held one job for 6 months working part-time at Wal Mart and dropped it because it was too stressful for college. She lives at home and barely cares about school, I make better grades. She just hangs out with friends or me.

Whenever we go out, I pay. She also has me buy her things on our outings like clothes and accessories, nothing huge. I have no problem with spending money on her and don't hold her being not employed against her but I am TIRED of always paying for her. Most of it is stuff or places SHE asks for, otherwise we wouldn't go. I'm tired of always having to give her rides, I am tired of getting little in return.

I have been with her for a year and I'm almost done. I want a woman who is independent and will contribute at least a little bit to the relationship. I hate working my ass off to come home to a messy apartment and her sitting on her duff playing XBOX and bitching that we haven't done anything in over a week. Am I normal or am I just an asshole?

Voting Results
87% Normal
Based on 91 votes (79 yes)
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Comments ( 21 )
  • ilovetoiletrolls
    9 years ago | pl

    You need to ditch her bro, she's not your ideal girl at all, not even close. You should find someone more similar to you.

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  • green_boogers
    9 years ago

    She is childishly dependent. Go find yourself a real woman.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    Looks like you've got a gold digger.

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  • TareBear20
    9 years ago

    Tell that to her face instead of an online forum. You can't expect anything to change without communication.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Oh, I HAVE. She whines too much and complains about the economy and about how stressful work and school is and has her friends jump down my throat if they're there.

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      • [Old Memory]
        9 years ago

        "It's the economy! It's stressful to work! So you have to work in the economy and stress yourself at work for the both of us".

        ...She's an idiot. She's a gold digging idiot. Leave her.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          9 years ago

          I really want to, but I am very close to her parents and I don't think she could be mature about it... Fuck, I have to figure something out...

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      • TareBear20
        9 years ago

        Fuck that, sounds like a petty, spoiled brat. No good.

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  • wistfulmaiden
    9 years ago

    youre a crappy sugar daddy

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    • ㅤㅤㅤ
      9 years ago

      LOL

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  • TareBear20
    9 years ago

    We all know you deserve better. ^__^

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  • GiveMeAFuckingNameAlready!
    9 years ago

    If your paying that just makes her a hoe. Love is a two way street.

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  • loopoo
    9 years ago

    Get rid

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  • poon_jabber
    9 years ago

    tell her if she doesn't provide you have no choice than to make her a webcam girl and DP her with your buddy on cam.

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  • Luscious_Alazay
    9 years ago

    You deserve way better. Sounds like a gold digger to me.

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  • ㅤㅤㅤ
    9 years ago

    I agree with all the other posts. Like, this sounds like this is doing you more stress than good. Honestly even though you've said you had before, I would try talking to her again. Don't hold back this time. Explain how you feel and maybe, just maybe, it'll open her eyes - and if it doesn't then well she's being very rude.

    As another poster said, she does not sound like what you have in mind for a partner. Do you love your girlfriend? Even so, I can see your patience is wearing thin and that's understandable. Just talk to her. Say EVERYTHING you've said here, hell, if you can't do it then copy and paste this post in an email or letter.

    I'm just worried that this could go from bad to worse, so sort everything as soon as possible. And good luck, man. I hope everything works out for the better.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I enjoy spending time with her and I love her but I do not believe that I am IN love with her. When I look at my future, I see a wife and kids and she does not fit in anywhere there.

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      • ㅤㅤㅤ
        9 years ago

        Sorry to say, but you may be wasting your time, then. Do what you think is best and good luck, man.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    Well when you put it like that, she sounds very inconsiderate. I only sympathised with her because I know how it feels to be a girlfriend that doesn't work and appreciate my boyfriend providing for me more than anyone will ever know. However, when you describe how genuinely lazy she is not only when it comes to jobs, but everything, it shines a new light on the subject. She should definetly be respectful of your home and although she should feel welcome and comfortable enough to help herself, there are lines you don't cross. After I eat, I wash whatever it is I've dirtied. When I cook, I make for whoever else wants. When I pour myself something to drink, I'll offer if my boyfriend might want some too. I definetly respect his home and don't bring people around unless its a friend of both of ours in which case he doesn't mind because they're his friends too (females) and he's at work during the day anyway. It sounds like she doesn't appreciate what you do for her and it seems like she's very childish.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    I think a gentleman wouldn't mind paying for his girlfriend when they go on dates, etc. I do however believe that if you're living together and she's not contributing financially, she should contribute in other ways, such as cleaning up, making your meals, making sure your guys' apartment is tidy, making sure you have clean, neatly packed away clothes, like housewife stuff, you know? If she never contributes in any way then it seems wrong. Doesn't she do anything to help out around the house? And do you guys live together? I'm confused because when you said she still lives at home I assumed with her parents but then you said something about coming home to a messy apartment with her just sitting playing xbox so I'm alittle confused as to what your living situation is. I don't think you're an asshole for feeling this way but I believe in tradition and I believe guys should be gentlemen and pay for their ladies' dates and stuff like that. That being said, she shouldn't just expect you guys to be able to go out whenever she wants. She needs to understand that since you are the one providing all the finances, your guys' outings will be limited because you can't afford regular outings on a limited salary especially if she is not bringing anything to the table financially. I'm 19 and I live with my boyfriend who's 25, and he works and I do not. Because of this, I take on most of the duties around the house so he doesn't have to. I clean up our room, I make sure his clothing is packed away neatly in his closet, I make sure he has clothing ready for when he gets home, I try to do these little things around the house so that he doesn't have to. He does the manly stuff, I go the girly stuff. I actually wrote a post on my opinion of how a women should be at home doing household duties and a man should work and provide, but a few people seemed to think I was the antichrist or something for thinking that men should work and women should work at home.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      She technically lives with her parents but is usually living at my apartment.

      She doesn't do anything. At all. I don't expect her to be my house wife or anything but she eats my food, makes a mess and does not clean up after herself at all. She never even cooks for the both of us. Only for herself.

      When I do get up the balls to ask, she tells me that she's too tired or that school has stressed her out. At first, I was sympathetic due to my believing that maybe she was mentally ill, but now? I don't care anymore. She's gotten way worse, bringing friends over when I'm trying to sleep between shifts. I feel completely unappreciated. I know I deserve better.

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