I'm so in love it hurts..

Don't look for anyone online. The thing is, it is really going to hurt you, you will get in a lot of delusions, and the reality will ALWAYS turn out to be completely different than your fantasies.

You are doing good by trying to detach. It takes a week for strong people, months for people who are not so strong, and the process is really painful.
Cut your throughts, cut your fantasies, and keep telling yourself that you are in control and not your emotions.

Look for someone IRL. You ARE hurting yourself. And good luck, you gonna need it.

I call bullshit on people falling in love with someone they've only ever interacted with online.

Yes, I know it IS possible. But more often than not we are just projecting our feelings, out of our own need onto that person about how we want them to be.

Don't ever try to convince yourself you are in love with someone until you've actually met them in the flesh. It's a fool's paradise. (I have been there and done that a couple of times)

Added to that, I've heard so many stories of people 'falling in love' with someone that is:
- not who you think they are
- simply not available (they actually have a wife and kids)
- has no real intention to actually meet you (so you just get strung along forever).
- is actually in the 'relationship' for ulterior motives (e.g. they have a sudden crisis, "My mom is in hospital, can you send money?"
or, " I'll come to your country when I finish my medical degree but I need money to finish my studies" etc etc etc – I have a friend who was asked both of those, she believed it too and sent money)

From the tone of your letter I could almost bet this person is in another country (am I right?) and has no real intention of actually meeting you.

Sorry to say it, but you sound desperate.

Good luck with it.

dating online used to be a lot scarier when you couldn't trade pics (didnt own a scanner) and couldnt video chat (no 320 pixel webcam). It's so much easier nowadays, there is a camera on fucking everything.

From what you have described, it sounds like you really are infatuated with him but there is doubt about whether or not you two will actually meet. Thats a red flag for me and i hope that you try to move away from this as quickly as possible.

Sounds like you are gonna get hurt, im more apprehensive that it could be worse. Im being paranoid but you as you implied you are out of his league. Therefore im curious as to why he is even wasting his time with you (if not for some kind of personal gain).

Please feel better. Please be safe.

Your head IS messing with you. You're in love with an idea.
It's easy to do, but it's not good.

Take a step back. Get some perspective. Until you've met him, he is essentially fictional. That's how you should think about it.
And besides, if you're this obsessed when you do meet him, you might not come across so well.

Sounds more like insanity that love to me. Considering you met him online all manner of terrible things can happen especially with all this love sick malarkey.

Do yourself a huge favor and write a list of must haves and deal breakers instead of obsessing over this mess. There's a good chance he could be a real scumbag. If he's not so nice you better hope he leaves you!

Only the saviour can help you now, pray for him and he will come

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I don't know why love online gets such a bad rep. Just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it can't happen.

I'm kinda in the same situation. I've been talking for 2.5 years now and i'm still so madly in love with him. I'm so bloody scared he'll meet a girl in his area. He's all I can think about... So yeah it hurts to be in love with him. But let me tell you, do not let it take over your life. I've experienced too much heartache because of him. Not being with him, worrying about the fact he could easily find a girl etc. It consumes you. As hard as it sounds, try to focus on other stuff too!
Plus, if you're busy and doing great you'll feel so much better! Who knows.. Maybe it will grab his attention. x

I'm involved with someone online, which I never thought I would be...I was a firm believer in every stereotype about online relationships, and completely and utterly against the idea, but hey, when you meet the right person, you meet the right person.

There's several caveats though.

Aside from the online safety shit- making sure you can verify their identity, being careful with personal info...

I agree with TrustMe- when given limited information about a person, it's so easy to fill in the blanks with fantasy. You gave to be careful not to idealize the other person; you'll probably be disappointed. You need to make sure your attraction is grounded in reality.

Also- I'd say meet as soon as possible (in a safe way). If your goal doesn't involve ultimately being together, that's an obvious sign that you're both happy with the fantasy rather than the reality.

I have more to say, but I don't want to type a novel here.

Having said all that, your relationship seems a little unhealthy. It's good to care about someone, but he can't be your end all. It's not ok for someone to be the only thing you have in life, and you shouldn't expect that from another person. You have to be able to be yourself on your own, otherwise what will you offer in the relationship, and what will you do if you break up?

Regardless of how you two met, you are going crazy with this.
You can't let your happiness depend on another person. Even if he means well, what if he has to move to another country, or anything happens to him. Is your lifegoing to become meaningless after that?

Enjoy your relationship, being in love is amazing. But keep your head in the right place, don't make him the center of your universe. It's not right and you know it, that's why you are writing here, you've been smart enough to look for help.

I say try cybering with him ;)