I'm almost numb

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4 Comments

Sometime during puberty, I lost all feeling towards other people. I don't really feel desire, or any other emotion. Or at least they are EXTREMELY dulled. I've been asked out by girls before, but declined because I had no attraction. I can still have sex like any other person, I still have physical feeling, but I haven't been in any relationships. Most of the feelings I display are just what I know I should feel if I could.

As for arousal, aside from physical contact, it takes some pretty extreme circumstances to get me there. This has led to me becoming a sadist. It's really the only thing I react to. You could probably curb stomp a newborn into chunky salsa in front of me and I'd feel nothing. How many other people have become dull to average stimuli?

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40% Normal
Based on 5 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • nerdisian
    6 years ago

    Hey, at first it just sounded like you were Aromantic, which is totally cool. But the sadist part at the end kinda got me thinking. You probably have intense mental health issues that aren't allowing you to feel emotion correctly. (I've been there, I know what its like.) If you're comfortable with not feeling emotion, that's fine I guess. But it would probably be a good idea to see a counselor or something, just to process it and figure out where it is coming from so that you don't hurt someone.

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  • dirtybirdy
    6 years ago

    "Stinkfist"

    Something has to change.
    Un-deniable dilemma.
    Boredom's not a burden
    Anyone should bear.

    Constant over stimu-lation numbs me
    but I would not want you
    any other way.

    It's not enough.
    I need more.
    Nothing seems to satisfy.
    I said
    I don't want it.
    I just need it.
    To breathe, To feel, to know I'm alive.

    Finger deep within the borderline.
    Show me that you love me and that we belong together.
    Relax, turn around and take my hand.

    I can help you change
    Tired moments into pleasure.
    Say the word and we'll be
    Well upon our way.

    Blend and balance
    Pain and comfort
    Deep within you
    Till you will not want me any other way.

    It's not enough.
    I need more.
    Nothing seems to satisfy.
    I said
    I don't want it.
    I just need it.
    To breathe, To feel, to know I'm alive.

    Knuckle deep inside the borderline.
    This may hurt a little but it's something you'll get used to.
    Relax. Slip away.

    Something kinda sad about
    the way that things have come to be.
    Desensitized to everything.
    What became of subtlety?

    How can it mean anything to me
    If I really don't feel anything at all?

    I'll keep digging
    Till I feel something.

    Elbow deep inside the borderline.
    Show me that you love me and that we belong together.
    Shoulder deep within the borderline.
    Relax. Turn around and take my hand.

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    • nikkiclaire
      6 years ago

      You Tool

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      • dirtybirdy
        6 years ago

        Oh so clever

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