I'm 20 years old, never had a girlfriend, still a virgin?

91% Normal
11 Comments

So, i'm a 20 year old black male, and i never had a girlfriend or sex. I've made out with only one at a club, and sometimes when i do go to clubs, i dance with girls, like 3 or 4 but most of the time i get swerved.

I've been in the army for a year now, and i joined becuase i want to have the college money to go to be a personal trainer. I love working out, i have become very strong and big ever since i started.

Here's a pic

here's a pic of me
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=30n85cz&s=8#.U8ITsaXnbqA

I live in Colorado springs, Co. Most of the girls here range from above average to your college girls.These girls are pretty good looking lol. But i sometimes see them with these other guys and i wonder if these girls have a deep attraction to these guys or if they are just messing around and killing time like just for social status or something.

Another obsticle that is in my way is that fact that i'm a different ethnicity from most of these girls. And it hurts that i have to complete with white guys to get at these girls. These girls are white/ hispanic, which is what i like. Most white men are desired by females of every race. I'm black. :? i don't fit the stereotype of an average african amercan male. I'm not ghetto, although sometimes i use ebonics sometimes, i don't drink or smoke, i never stole anything, i worked hard for what i have. i do listen to rap and hip hop, but i also listen to rock metal country, anything that sounds good.

Correct me if i'm wrong but it seems like they find these qualities in a black man, a turn off. Like when a girl says she likes black men, she's talking about the ghetto thug type.

i'm confident, and i can defend myself. I can be somewhat arrogant, but it really depends on the person on the way i act.

I can talk to these girls, but i hesitate sometimes to talk to them on a sexual/relationship level because i've had experiences to where they said they don't like black guys or something like that. I know it's thier preferences, but it hurts.. :( I want to continue to try, but i just don't want to be put in second.

Can anybody please help me on how i can change all this?

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91% Normal
Based on 35 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • disthing
    9 years ago

    Exhibit A:

    http://isitnormal.com/story/19-soon-to-be-20-and-never-had-a-girlfriend-180280

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-19-going-on-20-and-never-had-a-love-relationship-135465/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-have-never-had-a-serious-girlfriend-by-my-age-38104/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-19-and-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-71035/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/i-am-18-years-old-and-i-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-30519/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-a-virgin-at-19-and-to-never-had-a-girlfriend-31988/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-im-22-and-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-125121/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/never-had-a-girlfriend-at-almost-20-51843/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-ive-never-had-a-girlfriend-and-im-20-years-old-86599/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/20-years-old-and-never-had-a-girlfriend-58657/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-ive-never-had-a-girlfriend-and-im-22-years-old-142184/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-20-years-old-and-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-67222/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-i-never-had-a-girlfriend-162638/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/never-had-a-girlfriend-38111/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-have-never-had-a-girl-friend-at-18-58492/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-im-20-and-have-never-been-in-love-or-a-girlfriend-62817/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-im-19-and-never-have-had-a-proper-girlfriend-130459/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-never-had-a-girl-friend-at-21-129702/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-i-just-turned-18-and-never-had-a-girlfriend-150222/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/cant-find-a-girlfriend-27889/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-by-the-age-of-19-36529/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-18-and-never-been-on-a-date-37640/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-never-have-had-a-relationship-64962/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/iin-that-i-never-had-a-girlfriend-before-115482/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-have-never-hand-a-date-a-girlfriend-or-got-laid-116857/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-im-20-years-old-and-have-never-asked-a-girl-out-114903/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-be-21-and-have-never-had-a-girlfriend-75973/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-not-ever-have-a-girlfriend-by-18-50300/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/18-and-no-girlfriend-62660/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-not-to-have-a-gf-at-the-age-of-21-96583/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-a-25-years-old-guy-has-never-dated-anybody-169762/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-to-not-have-a-girlfriend-at-18-63308/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/i-am-19-and-have-never-been-kissedasked-out-is-it-normal-115743/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-ive-never-had-a-girlfriend-and-im-18-119166/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-i-am-19-and-havent-had-a-single-relationship-141310/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-for-a-22-year-old-to-be-a-virgin-with-no-girlfriend-36525/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-i-dont-have-a-girlfriend-82270/

    http://isitnormal.com/story/is-it-normal-that-im-an-eighteen-year-old-male-without-a-girlfriend-96059/

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    • noid
      9 years ago

      Thanks for this, and I mean it!

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    • TrustMeImLying
      9 years ago

      damn

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      • onlythatreal
        9 years ago

        That's s lot of exhibit a's

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  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    You and every other 20 year old, strike that; 30 year old, strike that; 40 year old on IIN. What's your hurry? You've got 20 years before you officially become an old maid.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    You seem like a cool guy. Just keep doing what you are doing and don't try to force things along too much. There are plenty of girls who have a "thing" for black guys. Race does not really matter anyways. You said you made out with a girl in a club? What did you do that led up to that situation?

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    • onlythatreal
      9 years ago

      I was dancing to salsa in the club, we just happen to be dancing next to each other, then we atarted grinding, and then we danced real close, and then it just happened. Made out right there on the dance floor. Then I took her upstairs and we made out some more and got to know each other.

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  • westoptic
    9 years ago

    Absolutely normal :) I'm a girl but I only ever had guy friends growing up and out of my three closest guy friends, only one of them has had sex and we're all 20-21 years old. And they're all attractive, funny guys, they just haven't gotten to that point. When you do it'll be worth the wait, trust me.

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  • SEWnanist23
    9 years ago

    I was admitting to women about that too there was always the trailer confession to masturbating to playboy as well.

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  • VirgilManly
    9 years ago

    You seem like a really decent guy. I definitely think it's just the women you're running into. Be patient. it'll happen.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    It's normal. I lost my virginity and had my first actual girlfriend at 20.
    Also girls love military men so it's likely you will have lots of women wanting to be with you soon.

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