I like a guy until i find out that he likes me?

58% Normal
17 Comments

I have normal crushes just like everyone else. However, if I ever find out that my crush likes me or if I start dating them, I no longer like them as much. And if we do start dating I just feel tied down. It's been almost 2 years now since me and my husband divorced, maybe this has something to do with it? (I'm only 21, we got married at a YOUNG age.) Also if I do start getting any stronger feelings than that for someone I instantly start panicking and those feelings quickly fade away for good. (within seconds) I don't really know if it's possible for me to legitimately like (love?) someone anymore. Is this normal..?

Voting Results
58% Normal
Based on 53 votes (31 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    sadly, most women are very much like you these days.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    That actually sounds really normal considering your past.

    Do you not trust yourself that you'll be able to get out of a potential relationship if it becomes "too serious" and you'll be trapped? Is it their romantic expectations that scares you off?

    Relax, enjoy the relationship for what it is in the moment and know that you always have a choice to get out of it in the future if you want to. You should never feel any guilt about ending it, if that is what you choose to do.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Yea that does make sense

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs
    11 years ago

    Well congratulations on being a typical woman. Playing men for fools and turning good guys into players. I applaud you. I too have been the victim of 'users' like you who play games, so to you kind sir, I say - Kill yourself.

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  • PapzBSlim
    11 years ago

    Do not know what it is that you want. I know a lot of females like you.

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  • MissClaire
    11 years ago

    Perhaps you just like the chase, the whole uncertainty side more than the actual guy.
    Also, being recently divorced does make the committment thing a bit less desierable - I think that will pass over time. Dont judge it, when you find someone you like, you will know.

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  • Francophile22
    11 years ago

    Ask yourself this: why would a guy who DOES NOT like you want to go out with you? By going out he is saying he likes you.

    Get some therapy, you need a LOT of it.

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  • wibamuftw
    11 years ago

    Unless it makes you uncomfortable, would you mind saying why you divorced? Was it his or yours or a mutual decision?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      It's complicated. I left at first. (wasn't being treated properly imo) But I came crawling back because I loved him so much. Then he started talking to some other chick that eventually started stopping by his work place every night. It was too painful for me so I moved to a completely different state because I felt like I was being backed into a corner. Now to this day I'm not sure if love truly exist.

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      • wibamuftw
        11 years ago

        Well that makes perfect sense then. And how you're feeling is so normal. If you've been hurt really bad, it's going to take a lot of time until you heal from it. I've had a similar situation but we weren't married, which being married probably makes it 10x worse, the love of my life was dating someone behind my back. It took me four years to fully recover. And the people I dated I never really felt anything towards and would only last like 2 months and then it ended. When it did end I didn't feel very hurt, sorry but not hurt. It's really really hard to be with someone for so long and get used to your life with them and have so many things around you that remind you of that person and think of how you used to think you'd spend the rest of your life with them. It's going to take a while to heal, and I'm sorry that, that happened to you I hope it works out best for you and you find someone eventually you can fall in love with and be happy with.

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  • shade_ilmaendu
    11 years ago

    This is typically referred to as "the thrill of the chase" and once that's gone, so is your fun so to speak.

    You'll get over it in time I'm sure, how long were you and your husband together? You're probably fearful of commitment right now because you were married young and may not have had much time to figure out what you really wanted. Just take your time, maybe date casually, get to different kinds of events and get to know different kinds of people. Don't rush it, just take some time to figure yourself out and see what happens. :)

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    • Captain_Kegstand
      11 years ago

      You pretty much covered what I was going to say! Btw, hi... Long time no talk!

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      • shade_ilmaendu
        11 years ago

        Keggers! I was wondering where you wandered off to :D

        How've you been?

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        • Captain_Kegstand
          11 years ago

          Good, just workin and disappearing from the face of iin for a bit lol :)

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Thanks, we were together for 5 years and was married for 3 of them. (got together when I was 15) But yea your right, I have been trying to figure out what I really want and I think I don't want to be in a relationship because then I start wondering, what if someone else I really like comes along?

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Bored i think you are.

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  • hotpinkangel96
    11 years ago

    Same here! I feel the exact same way but you just have to keep the romance alive and dont be to flirty but cute the right guy will come though so dont lose hope!!<3

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