I in to sleep in a different room?

83% Normal
6 Comments

Okay so this woman I am dating has severe allergies and always makes a lot of noises while sleeping. I have trouble with insomnia already and her cacophony makes it impossible for me to sleep so I often go to another bedroom in the middle of the night to sleep.

She gets offended by this like I spited her or something. I just enjoy the little sleep where ever I can find it and remind her going to bed and waking up together is much more important than actually "sleeping together." I run hot and don't cuddle all night anyways so that is off the table from the get go. Cuddling is something to do while awake, sleeping is independent and most healthy self serving.

Voting Results
83% Normal
Based on 6 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • e51pegasi
    6 years ago

    I think separate bedrooms have saved an awful lot of relationships & marriages for many reasons, including the op's comments.

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  • Boojum
    6 years ago

    While I can understand your girlfriend feeling hurt, I think she's being pretty selfish for denying you a good night's sleep. Also, if she's making that much noise, it's possible she's not sleeping that well either.

    What's causing the snuffling and snorting? It's extremely common for mattresses and pillows to be infested with dust-mites, and a lot of people react badly to dust from their feces. Maybe it's time for her to get some new pillows and a hypoallergenic mattress cover?

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  • Hotdogsaregross
    6 years ago

    You're normal for wanting to go to the other room.
    I have a similar problem with my husband. He snores extremely loud and every single night he will stop breathing or something and then once he starts breathing again he will get into a long loud coughing fit that always wakes me up.

    It's frustrating because it hard to actually go to sleep because of the snoring only to be awoken a couple hours later by the coughing episode.

    I have slept in the other room a couple times and he got offended. So now I use ear plugs and they help somewhat. I think one night I'm going to record him snoring and doing the coughing episode so that he can see how bad it is.

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    • Boojum
      6 years ago

      "... every single night he will stop breathing..."

      That's sleep apnea and, depending on the cause, it can have serious consequences, including sudden death. People with apnea also suffer from chronic exhaustion, since they never sleep well, and this can lead to other bad things like dozing off behind the wheel of a car.

      Is your husband overweight? My wife tells me that my snoring reduced a lot when I lost weight.

      In any case, he should talk to a doctor about this, rather than getting annoyed with you.

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      • Hotdogsaregross
        6 years ago

        He has seen a doctor years ago and was diagnosed with sleep apnea before I even met him. He does nothing to help with it and doesn't seem to care to get help even though I told him a lot that it scares me when he stops breathing.

        And yeah he is overweight. He was average weight when I first got with him and he still would snore really loudly. I have noticed when he lays on his side he snores less so I usually turn him on his side when he starts snoring loudly lol.

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  • Justmehere
    6 years ago

    I don't blame you. If she doesn't understand her own problem or noises and what they do to you, boot her ass out. My ex was a chronic, please stop before I kill you, throat=clearer, especially at night or when she had dairy products. I had many evenings of getting out of my own bed and going to either the guest bedroom or couch, just to get away from it and her. Told her why, and it would be an argument. I even tried earplugs, but it wasn't enough.

    When I was with another woman, who was quiet and normal at night in bed, I slept so well I had to remind myself..THIS is how it's supposed to be, not the constant throat clearing lying next to me driving me crazy.

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