I have no respect for my father...

85% Normal
8 Comments

Recently, I have discovered that I really don't have much respect for my father. It's just how he is as a person, a friend, a father, a brother, and a husband. Personally, I don't think he is very good at being either of those...which is quite sad. He always embarrases me (not on purpose), and I'm quite ashamed of him. I always try to hide who he really is from people that matters to me such as my friends, girlfriends, etc. I don't like having him around often, and I sure as hell don't like introducing him to my friends. He's never really did anything extremely terrible or anything... In my eyes, he's just kind of pathetic. He's not a REAL man. At least not under my definition. I feel sorry for him, but I understand why he's in that position, and he does somewhat deserve it. One thing that bothers me the most is the fact that I have inherited some of his personality traits. I hate it. I don't want to be like him at all. I want to be better than him. Also, I would love to have a good and repectful relationship with him, but I find it very difficul. It would be very sad if my father and I go through our entire life like this, that's for sure.

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85% Normal
Based on 324 votes (275 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Jweezee
    12 years ago

    I'm having trouble telling you whether your lack respect is justified with so little information about dear 'ole dad. Does he get shit faced and slap your mom around? Has he made awkward sexual advances to anyone? Did he miss all of your soccer games and school functions? Nasty crack habit?

    Or
    Did he not get you the new i pad for x-mas? Wouldn't loan you that money? Didn't buy you the car you wanted when you turned 16?
    You came,partly, from your dads nutsack. That deserves a little respect there. And if he didn't do some creepy shit and is not a terrible father then cut the old man some slack. Many people would give a lot for a mediocre uninspiring dad.

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  • Dozis
    12 years ago

    one day you will have a son of your own, if you get very unlucky, then you'll be on the other side. And kind of go: What?

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Yep everyone does it

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  • whocares1
    12 years ago

    I just love how us fathers are supposed to work ourselves to death, be poor, neglect our health, neglect our happiness, die young, all to support our kids and yet they could not give a s**t. My kids could care less and at some point why should I?

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    • guest500
      9 years ago

      It is the responsibility of the individual "father" as an adult to not neglect their health, set aside time for socialization and keep themselves healthy and set appropriate boundaries to make sure he gets what he needs. One must take care of himself and love himself in order to take care of others.

      A child cannot be held responsible for being born into the world nor responsible for telling a parent they have to balance their life.

      Judging from the lack of responsibility and blame projected in your response it is evident that a lot of blame is placed on the "kids." And it is not a surprise that this attitude would not be received well.

      If the relationship with your children is based on love and respect rather than blaming and victimization, it is a good chance the dark place you are in would be illuminated. I feel very sorry for the children of parents who have not grown up enough and only want to blame, shame and put in the bare minimum because they see it as everyone else's fault.

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  • KnowYourEnemy
    12 years ago

    For the record, I have unconditional love for him. I mean, he is my father and all. In need, I would be by his side, and I do respect the fact that he supports me/our family and everything. It's just...I don't agree with some of his choices/decisions, and how he acts/behaves. He didn't put much effort into building a relationship with any of us, he still doesn't. He drinks way too much, and goes out of control more than the average person. It's ok every now an then, but not most of the time... He doesn't let alcohol get in the way of his work or anything though. His addiction to alcohol is not extreme, but I would say it's pretty high. He doesn't get physically abusive, but he can be verbally abusive. He doesn't know how to speak to his own family, friends, people in gneral. He yells quite often and he can be pretty offensive. He shows very little class. We're by no means wealthy or anything, and I don't expect him to be really classy and act like if we're rich, but just don't act like a bum. I can go on and on about this... I know you guys won't exactly understand the situation without meeting him.

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    • Shay145
      7 years ago

      Idk if you will reply to this but i COMPLETELY understand what you are going through because i am as well..we can talk about it sometime if you want too..

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  • SpideyBoy
    12 years ago

    I think its normal. I am the same with my birth father and step father. I am more educated then both my fathers and they are both kind of macho. My views on life are so different then theirs so it puts me into a weird situation. I love them both very much and I don't like to think I am better. My advice is try to see the good in your dad. Does he provide for you? Is he good to your mother? if he is responsible and does a decent job providing as a father, respect him for those reasons.

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