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My biggest turn-on is a guy who has seen some shit in life, and has become depressed beyond the point of no return. If I date someone, they have to be generally very sad people. I've always thought this to be a very strange thing about me. Normal?
Well I guess I'm lucky...I tend to hide my shitty feelings about everything behind a pretty face. :D
...Oh shit, what have I done! Get away from me!
I am like that too, I suffer from depression and extremely drawn to sad depressed guys who listen to emo stuff. I find it difficult to maintain an attraction to a normal sane guy. The more negative a guy is the more I want him.
Let's hope that you don't seek to keep them in their depression, and try to help them get better. Otherwise, no, it isn't normal and it's a tad disturbing.
As long as you aren't one of those people who believe that your love and time can fix people. Because the sad truth is that some people can not be fixed, and certainly not just from love.
Guys have grown tired of me because my ADHD and the insecurities, mood-swings and drama that sadly follows in spite of how much I desperately try to work with my issues it will probably always be present.
I just wish that people could either steer clear of me or be ready to support me fully.
I like what Verbalkint said. many women tend to be care givers. Others see depressed men as a wounded bird who needs emotional and healing support until they become well enough to fly away on their own. This makes them feel like some kind of spiritual being as long as they don't fly toward you.
i want to yell and punch things.
but i find it difficult to wanting to be in a relationship with someone who is as depressed as you describe. it will always be, i love you, i don't want to be hurt, or the whole i don't want to hurt you so i think its best we don't see each other any more. constant whining is annoying after so long.
you will be pushed away, but get asked to come over, or can we talk, blah, blah, blah. and in the end its right back where you started. a waste of time. if the person can't get out of their depression and its you doing all the work, its a lost cause.
but they say there is someone for everyone, i guess that's why there are people like you that can be attracted to such a person.
so yes, its normal. it takes all kinds to make the world go round.
It depends on much more than that. People handle depression in different ways. I do like talking to people who have had real problems because they have insight to things many people do not.
Some people are simply mentally ill and I can understand that too, because we do not always get to control our thoughts.
What annoys me is people who allow depression to defeat them and always have something to complain about that are based off typical bullshit problems.
I can say from my own experience I have seen quite a lot of shit in life and I have genetic mental illness as well. I am very aware of how fucked the world can be and have been in many situations involving topics such as suicides, rape, disease, drugs, and many other negative situations. Still I put in a lot of effort even when I have lost much I cared about that I try to prevent. I am prepared to fight these situations again if they occur and when I hear about somebody complaining about little bullshit I cannot help but want to smack them although I try to keep those thoughts to myself.
Despite all this I find it is extremely important to smile and find humor in the irony that is everywhere. Without laughter there is only a wasted life and a smile can be the best weapon against the worst times.
Sounds like you like to be a "saviour" . Takes all kinds. Including ones that adore the broken.