I hate the male gender and i'm ashamed to be a part of it.

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22 Comments

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vT4ZHcF4Ejg

The above YouTube video is the dinner scene from the original film adaptation of A Streetcar Named Desire (the one with Marlon Brando as Stanley).

What Stanley (the dude) does is not without its reality element. This is not an all-too-uncommon scenario, not even today.

Stanley's behavior in that video was:
*Mean
*Misogynistic
*Unfair
*Disgusting
*Abusive
*Cruel
*Violent
*Destructive
*Chauvinistic
*Etc.

Stanley also completely defied the bourgeois conventions of table manners, such as not chewing with your mouth open, Talking with your mouth full, and using cutlery. Not only that, but the bourgeois conventions of being nice to other human beings. He is leaving the basic system of conventional social interaction a ruin with his brute force.

Now this is where the problem comes in. The message I'm getting from society, not least of all the comments on that video, is that the way Stanley behaved was good, acceptable, admirable, even cool and awesome.

"Every skinny emo faggot with skin-tight purple jeans and a low v-neck shirt should watch this video and take notes on what if means to be ALPHA."

"AAAND THAT'S how we remind women of their place."

"Ahahaha! Heads down, and mouths shut. Aahhh, the good old days. Nice. Best movie ever."

YouTube is not a hotbed of intellectuality of course, but that just makes it closer to the baseline of human instinctive opinions.

I don't see how anyone could enjoy being an alpha male. I observe it as being an obscene amount of stress, constantly fighting other people, figuratively and literally, constantly pushing yourself to edge-of-reality levels to prove to your friends you can take it. It's vigilance at every single turn. My dad's an alpha male and his wife and kids hate him.

Now this brings me to my second and final problem. I try and I try as much as I can to defuse alpha-malism through similar mediums and venues to this, but I feel that that hard logic is not enough. I feel that alpha-malism is too powerful to even be swayed by that. The message that masculinity is supreme is fucking everywhere.

I think that masculine males are the reason we can't have nice things as a species. That's why I dislike the male gender. I find that as a rule of thumb, the more masculine, the worse.

Your thoughts? (I would love to hear opinions from "Alpha Males")

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Based on 173 votes (128 yes)
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Comments ( 22 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago | pl

    My father was something like what you're describing. He was strong but not at all intelligent. He didn't know how to focus his anger.

    Unlike you, though, I make a distinction between one failed individual and 50% of humanity.

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  • A-Hor
    11 years ago

    Anyone who tries to act like this type of men is one word: Insecure. We are human beings that have both masculine AND feminine qualities. How so? Because HUMANS create the gender norms. Not god or biology. We did.

    In some societies today, the roles of gender are actually reversed. Women are seen as strong, and men are the caretakers. With that being said, men who live in an andro-centric society are typically misguided. So I can't really "blame" them for being so ignorant. Because let's face it, we are so hypnotized by gender. On the day we are born, the first question asked is always always always, "Is it a boy or a girl?" It's not, "Is the baby healthy?" It's always, "What sex is it?" Because so many people are excited to create yet another gender stereotyped boy or girl.

    So all of these men that try to be "alpha-male" are really just jealous and angry because gender norms do not allow them to show their emotions or express and "feminine" desires they have. The only way for them to prove their manhood and mask their insecurities is to pick on women and gay men. They see feminine as weak, and because of their misguided views, they stereotype that all women and gay men must be effeminate because of how structured they have to be to be men. What better to prove to people you're not a woman or a gay man than by picking on such people?

    I feel it's my duty to tell other guys acting this way, "You know, you don't have to bully others to prove you are a man. You can still be a man without having to be an asshole to everyone." See, some guys just never got the knowledge that it's OKAY to be kind. (Yet another quality seen as feminine.) I used to hate guys like these like you did. But the truth is, now I just feel bad for them. But don't try and stoop to their level. Just try to educate them with a quick little seed of knowledge, and walk away.

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    • SuperBenzid
      11 years ago

      Isn't this poster pretty insecure if he hates men though? Anyone that would hate a whole group of people for a thing they had no choice in, sounds pretty insecure to me.

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      • q25t
        11 years ago

        No. The source of the insecure claim is the fact that the men constantly have to show just how "manly" they are to others simply to prove they are manly. Insecurity has nothing to do with not liking people.

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        • SuperBenzid
          11 years ago

          But this guy says "I hate the male gender", so he hates men and then goes on to complain about misogyny. Which is a joke on its own. It sounds like he is a deeply effeminate male and that has led him to hating men because of his own insecurities.

          There is nothing wrong with being effeminate but there is something wrong with hating the entirety of the male gender.

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          • A-Hor
            11 years ago

            No, SuperBenzid is absolutely right. There is definitely insecurity on both sides. Now mind you, they are for completely different reasons... I grew up a more sensitive boy. And lot of other boys made fun of me. I wasn't educated about gender norms or society back then. We were just children. But I was isolated very quickly. Was I insecure as a result of that? Absolutely!

            I used to hate men. But I was not angry at men because I was *envious* of who they were. I was angry at men because they were rewarded for being who they were, and I wasn't. They had more opportunity and power than I could ever have, and they could use their power without judgement from other men. I've tried to kill myself on three separate occasions. All because I wasn't accepted for what I was. I was taught by our society that the only way to get out of this harassment was to conform; and one day I finally just said, "Why? What is wrong with being a man that is sensitive, effeminate, or gay?"

            Then suddenly I realized: I wasn't angry at men for hating me, I was angry at men because they made me hate myself. I knew if I was ever to going to feel a sense of power, I had to educate and accept myself. So I started to study sexuality, sociology, feminism, philosophy, psychology, etc. And let me tell you: Education = Forgiveness. Now I understand that the men who mistreated me were also victims. The only difference between them and I was that they were successful into conforming at a younger age. So they never had to question that authority telling us to be masculine and "macho men" because their lives weren't really effected by the gender norms. Not to their conscious minds anyway. Why would they need to question authority when they got to be in the "power group?"

            What the asker needs to do is keep educating themselves on everything they can get their hands on and learn to accept yourself, as well as forgive others. You may have already started this process, but it took you a long time to get to where you are with the anger you have boiling inside you. It's going to take a long time to get rid of that all. Honestly, I don't hate men anymore. I just feel sorry for most of them. And I do my best to always educate them when given the chance. So if someone makes fun of you, call them out on it and ask why they do it. You might just make them stop and think for a second. And if they don't listen, remember to never feel ashamed. Because you are smarter than them. They can choose to live in ignorance, but one day it will come back to bite them in the ass. Many men have apologized to me over the years and admitted that they were wrong. But I never could have felt that justice without learning to forgive them first. Just remember to not stoop to their level.

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            • [email protected]
              7 years ago

              Mmmm no there's a conflationism going on here that misunderstands basic theory I think and misunderstands the theorist you're replying to SuperBenzid I do not believe that OP Is insecure because he "Hates the male gender"

              this is one of those things where it would have been better if you had a bit of your background in feminism before starting to really question things.

              See to me when somebody evokes the term "gender" I don't conflate it with "Sex" anymore.

              it's possible to to totally cool with men while hating the masculine gender projections especially of your culture.

              Saying "I hate the male gender." Does not equate to or equal " I hate men"

              they're two different things. People continue to mix these two up.

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  • Darkoil
    11 years ago

    The guy in the video isn't a masculine male, he is just a cunt.

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  • Maya05
    11 years ago

    I don't 'hate' men as a whole. But I definitely often feel disgusted having to be grouped with them. I know there are good guys out there, but all we ever seem to see are the sexist, sex-driven, macho, idiots. And I just can't stand it.

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  • coolio75650932
    11 years ago

    so you hate every man alive? even the polite gentlemen(such as myself) i am offended and demand an apology on behalf of every polite gentleman in the world.

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  • robbieforgotpw
    11 years ago

    Be a female then, I only read the subject line.

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  • Vanguard
    11 years ago

    Most of those "Alpha Males" are just insecure fuckheads and put others down to hide their insecurities.

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  • jeebley
    11 years ago

    I think theres a weird thing going on in our culture atm with this concept of the 'alpha male' becoming popular, misunderstood and young men changing their behaviour to try and fit with what they think being 'alpha' is about. Many people are naturally confident, self-reliant, assertive (and so at ease in their own universe that it tends to dominate other peoples universes). These people Can be arseholes but many are Not. But now that its so important to act Alpha, young men skip the authentic confidence and cover it up by acting like a douchebag, putting other males down to try and raise themselves on their perceived pecking order, as well as objectifying women. cos thats ALPHA! yay!
    In reality you can be respectful of people and keep your masculinity intact.
    Then: "Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
    And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!"

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Does this mean i'm not a man oh my days.

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  • ucipher8
    11 years ago

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oUA6wirNfE

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  • ucipher8
    11 years ago

    Cant you here me yellA? Stella...

    STELLA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • SplinterWingz
    11 years ago

    I think you're one of the few male people i could get along with. I had guys who act like this and they seem to be bloody everywhere now.

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  • hairyfairy
    11 years ago

    I used to wish that I was a man because they seemed to always have everything their own way, better pay,more respect, & of course the freedom to walk the streets without being scared of being pestered by perverts. Now I think that if I was a man, I`d be ashamed of my sex because of all the bad things that men get up to, so I prefer being female now.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    what a play , what an actor

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  • SuperBenzid
    11 years ago

    I'm a masculine male and I'm ashamed that you're part of the male gender too, so I guess it is normal.

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  • Cherrybombpieee
    10 years ago

    Yes u should be ashamed

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  • SuperBenzid
    11 years ago

    So first you say "I hate the male gender" then you go onto to complain about misogyny. What a hypocrite. You hate men and then you go on to complain about people that hate women.
    Both kinds of hatred are stupid.

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