I hate my dad

77% Normal
24 Comments

My dad used to be a drug addict. Whatever money he earned from his job he would immediately spend it on drugs. Some days he would just be gone for days, or even weeks. When he was home though, it was worse. He beat me and my brothers and blamed us for his problems. My childhood was hell, until my mom finally got some courage and left him, taking us with her. 6 years later, my I meet my dad again. He says that he's in rehab now and that he's sorry for what he's done to me in the past. I didn't forgive him, is that okay?

Voting Results
77% Normal
Based on 140 votes (108 yes)
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Comments ( 24 )
  • haylo
    15 years ago

    Please forgive him.

    My Dad has just died, and whatever I wanted to say I can't.

    If it is in the past he is changed, and if he isn't help him.

    It is easier to forgive when he is living.

    Love
    h
    xx

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    • BUA420
      15 years ago

      i agree...my dad died 5 days before my 7th birthday and i have very little memories of him...your dads trying to do his best by forgetting his past and getting over that deadly addiction...he couldnt help it and the drugs were controlling him..i know he loves you deep down inside and really wants to be apart of your life so just give him a chance...forgive and forget everything and just start all over!!! one day you will realize that your glad for forgiving him because im sure hes a great guy/dad!!! if i can have my dad back i will with out hesitation so just think that tomorrow isnt pomised so live life to the fullest with no regrets and dont waste time by being mad at your dad for making a mistake...everyone makes mistakes so everyone should be forgiven! good luck! xoxo

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  • buriedalive
    15 years ago

    You have every right not to want anything to do with your father after that. Don't waste your time hating him though, he's not worth the aggrevation.

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    • blooblaa
      15 years ago

      OMG i had a similar situation! lucky i found this post!
      I didn't forgive my dad either. Don't make the same mistake, bc eventually (okay it took a really long time) i really wanted to get to know him and thought about him a lot and sought him out. I still don't really love him, but I feel better that we're positive parts of each other's lives now.
      Honestly tho, you being nice/close to him is mostly for his benefit, just think of what an amazing thing u're doing and do it and eventually you will feel really good about it and maybe even find that u have a lot in common and perhaps don't hate him so much.

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  • denise1290
    11 years ago

    If he's truly sorry, then you should forgive him. What more can he do?

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  • DavidS.
    12 years ago

    You feel the way you feel..accept it...you probably have evry right to be...however, the fact that he apologizes is a way of validating what you feel..he is admitting that he may have harmed you...this is a big step for him and you...

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  • aminormal999
    12 years ago

    my dad ruined my 11th birthday i did nothing and he was a jerk he did not even say happy birthday i didnt feel any older or anything i wanted the day to be over

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  • lillabillaxx
    14 years ago

    its easy tyo save just forgive him but at the end of the day what he did have scarred you for life so be supportive but i understand if its hard. forgiviness may come in time :) x

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  • johnedwards
    14 years ago

    Yes thats okay. Only you decide when and if you will ever forgive that piece of shit.

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  • marijuana
    14 years ago

    forgive him. he's yo dad...you wont get another one

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  • Lovelickingpussy
    14 years ago

    4 give u r dad he was sick now he is getting better
    i dont have a dad and i wish i do love you dad

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  • Gabriell
    14 years ago

    FORGIVE and forget. Or at least pretend to do so since the guy is in rehab!!

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  • onelove
    14 years ago

    i went through the same thing but he stole from family to feed his addition and wasn't there for me as a child growing up... i still have a pure hatred for the things he did but he is dying and i talk to him and tell him i love him it is hard for me to do but i couldn't let my father die w/his kid hating him i would not want to die that way either so u might wanna atleast try to make the best out of what u can

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  • oquenbe
    14 years ago

    forgive him people do bad things when they are on drugs ive never had the chance to meet my father doesnt bother me i just wish i had the chance to build a relationship with him and know him alittle but hey fuck it

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  • richielarry
    14 years ago

    It is normal not to forgive him. Please try to but if you can't then don't feel bad.

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  • [Old Memory]
    15 years ago

    That is very OK. Did he really expect you to just forgive him? That sounds selfish. If he wants to make amends, he has to give you time and realize that you may never come around to him, nor should you have to nor want to.

    Look - people who abuse & inflict pain on others go too far. If you never find yourself able to forgive him, that is not your fault or weakness. He deserves nothing from you.

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  • fk7inkraginendykott
    15 years ago

    I know it's hard but find a way to forgive him if his ways have changed. It may take time. Just seeing him once every now and then wont work. You need to see him over time and see him as he really is. If you don't give him and yourself that chance you may regret it later.It's hard to forgive abuse. That's burned into your mind and will be there forever. Give him chances to show he's changed. You may be surprised.

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  • bluezebra
    15 years ago

    I honestly don't think you have any good reason to forgive your dad, i hate my dad too, he doesn't use drugs, but he does gamble, and he is uncaring (hehe, my mom kicked him in the nuts, and broke his pinky when he tried to beat my older sister)so, yeah, I'd say it was pretty normal, but then i don't know any one else i know who would agree except my neighbors.

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  • cjwright79
    15 years ago

    Your feelings are not negotiable. If you hate him you hate him.

    Work through the hate and you'll get somewhere better. Don't try to deny or repress it. Embrace the hate. It's there for a reason.

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  • Justanotherdirtyoldman
    15 years ago

    For your sake you should forgive your dad, but you need to release your anger first. I have learned that the best way to vent anger about someone is to write them a honest letter about how you feel. So sit and write "Dear Dad," then tell him in the letter just how much you hate him and how he has effected you life. Now with the finished letter in hand, go burn it and put his foolish actions in your past. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life, live it with joy!

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  • shooterpwns
    15 years ago

    forgive him man...drugs are a serious problem hes in rehab wich means he wants out he wants his past "deleted" he really is sorry i know casue i was simular like him, i was doing things i that even i cant forgive myself doing

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  • ithinkilovemyboyfriend
    15 years ago

    i think you should forgive him, i know it might be really hard for you especially after six years, but try to forgive him parents also make mistakes, if you were in his shoes he would've forgive you emmidiately

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  • oreo4ever
    15 years ago

    i know im just part of the crowd but you have to forgive. for exmple haylo went through the worst thing possible so do what you can, love live. forgive, live, and be happy because one day you will regret it.

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  • GreyScale
    15 years ago

    YOU and HIM would suffer less if you simply forgave him.

    But just because you forgive him, you don't have to stick around him.

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