I hardly ate and yet did a godzilla turd

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13 Comments

I hardly ate anything today just a banana and just now I had two mcdonalds meals. But that was just now like 20 mins ago. Turds take hours to form don't they? I shitted something so humoungous I had to hold onto the bath to brace myself. It hurt too. Then after the goliath something else quite big came out too. I checked the toilet to see it was a-okay. Felt like I shitted a vital organ out there so had to check. When I wiped it was almost totally clear so that was a relief, these brown whales were classy smooth movers.

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84% Normal
Based on 37 votes (31 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    It probably pushed out preexisting waste. Do you suffer from chronic constipation? Eat a banana with every meal. Drink water and eat vegetables. Cut that fast food crap out of your diet.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Thanks for the advice. I don't drink enough water.

      I don't have any constipation problems lol. I hardly ever eat junk food this was a one-off.

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      • Avant-Garde
        9 years ago

        You're welcome. Hmm, perhaps the fast food caused you gastric discomfort? Hence, the pain? What it wide? I know that this is going to sound gross, but I've torn my anus from trying to pass dumps that were too wide. It hurts so bad!

        You should also consider taking/eating probiotics and foods with enzymes. It help you better digest your food and support healthy gut flora. They are some foods that naturally have enzyme properties: Gauva, Papaya, Pineapple, and kiwi.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          9 years ago

          Thanks, I think I will try probiotics.

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          • Avant-Garde
            9 years ago

            Good luck! I recently found a constipation cure in peanuts and black tea.

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    Bananas. Have powerful laxative powers. I used to eat one after ever meal and I would have massive dumps.

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  • Mersaphe
    9 years ago

    that was so poetic you must be a literary genius

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  • cocoapeaches
    9 years ago

    This made my entire night.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Cool, glad you appreciated it. True story too.

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      • cocoapeaches
        9 years ago

        I just lived it. Freaky. Gotta be the McDonalds.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    9 years ago

    Just tells me you are full of crap.

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  • suescribbles
    9 years ago

    its the mcdonalds..

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Not really, shit wouldnt form like that in 20 minutes would it, pinhead?

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