I got mad at my fan and broke it, all over a fart!!

34% Normal
25 Comments

So I'm just sitting there, the fan is on, and I happened to fart.

This fart was no ordinary fart, it stunk so bad!! I had McDonald's yesterday, so that's why it was so ripe.

I wanted to savor it, to inhale it over and over, to feel the hotness of it for as long as possible.

Well I didn't get to, the fucking fan saw to that!! This stupid fan, spinning it's blades, chopping the air, and dissipating my epic fart almost instantly!!

I got one sweet second to know this beautiful fart before it was so cruelly ripped away from me by this evil fan.

The fan had to die. Period. I choked it's stupid pedestal 'neck', punched it about it's 'face' several times and ripped it's cord off and gave it a whipping with it. Yeah, that's right, fan. I'm beating you with your own fucking cord.

But now I'm hot and sweaty. Fuck.

is it normal to break an object when it pisses you off, then you kind of regret it afterwards?

Voting Results
34% Normal
Based on 101 votes (34 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • FrancoisDillinger
    11 years ago | pl

    Let us have a moment of silence for this fart.

    It was removed from this earth far too soon.
    :/

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    • flutterhigh
      11 years ago | pl

      Nobody fart during the moment of silence. That would just be rude.

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      • Anonymous Post Author
        11 years ago

        A silent-but-deadly fart during the moment of silence would be awesome tho.

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      • FrancoisDillinger
        11 years ago

        Ahahaha nice

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        • flutterhigh
          11 years ago

          Shhhhh!

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  • Jweezee
    11 years ago | pl

    You don't feel bad that just lost your #1 fan? :/

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  • RubyCane
    11 years ago

    YOU-TOTALLY-ARE-MY-ABSOLUTE-FUCKING-HERO!!! Epic story, it had everything; creation, passion, betrayal, loss, rage, violence, justice, regret, questioning... Should be nominated for the "Troll of the Year 2012" Awards!!!

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I destroy enough things by accident, I don't need to set out to do it on purpose.

    Sorry to hear about your fart, I'm sure there will be others. Don't give up.

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  • alv1592
    11 years ago

    Someone once stole my funnel cake and I kicked their eyes into the back of their head.

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  • Captain_Kegstand
    11 years ago

    I can't believe I took the time to read a whole story about you raging a fan for not letting you sniff your own ass funk! You have to know that isn't normal! lolz

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Ah but it's about so much more than a fart. The fart was the inspiration that allowed this beautiful retelling of events to be. Can you say you've ever read a better story about a mere fart? (please say no or I'll be crushed) The best part is that it's all true. And you know what else?? I found that the smiles and laughter I was able to bring to people by telling this story was worth the stupid $15 I had to spend on a new fan.

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      • Captain_Kegstand
        11 years ago

        I will agree that was the most well written, and funniest story I have ever read about a fart, no arguments there! My question, is $15 bucks worth replacing a rage destroyed fan? haha I guess I'm just to poor to see it lolz.

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  • ladyluck31
    11 years ago

    Don't worry, if the fart loves you it'll come back, but the fan got the last laugh, now you're hot and need a cool off but you killed your only means to air over a fart, lol :-)

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  • NocturnePonyFan
    11 years ago

    That story made me cry with grief. How fucking DARE that fan dissipate your precious gas!!!

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    Next time, either turn off the fan or run to tight little room, like a closet, and let it out. You can savour it until it naturally dissipates. Don't beat the poor fan, it was just doing its job.

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  • Parky_Parker
    9 years ago

    The fan dieded? The fan dieded.
    :(

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  • fartonmyface
    11 years ago

    Not normal but epic.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    You sir are insane .

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  • jesusj
    11 years ago

    No. Favorited. Farted.

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  • Myisitnormal
    11 years ago

    This is going on unfriendable. Now.

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  • MoeLester
    11 years ago

    That'll get you laid.
    Really.
    I'm having this fantasy about sex with you..your Mickey D's flatulence filling my nostrils right before we climax...mmm. Kinky shit.

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  • Justs0meguy
    11 years ago

    This story needs a movie!

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  • jess714
    11 years ago

    Hahahaha ha I love you

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  • Who_Fan4Life
    11 years ago

    I am truly honored that you would call me ''your fan.''

    Am I your Fan4Life?

    You know you could always take me back!

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I guess he wasnt a FAN OF YOU ! XD OH YEEEEEEAH !

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