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My life has gone downhill so much in the past several months and I feel like there is no hope for me. I just exist, and seemingly for no reason. I am so sad and disillusioned that I dont know how Ill ever feel hopeful again. Is it normal to sink this low?
Damn. I feel very similiar to you. I guess I'm a little bit different though.
I yearn for a better life on a different planet and I'm only here because there are still things I got to do. It's just that feeling of never feeling like you belong, you know? I feel alienated to everyone else. It's like I'll never be the same as them as I feel like I was never meant to.
I feel the same about not belonging, but maybe for a different reason. I try to relate to people, but usually everytime it just reminds me how I don't belong. It's a very very shitty feeling! You could look all your life and never really find where you're happy. Then again, if you quit trying you're never gonna know. In spite of everything I keep trying to remind myself, giving up is not an option until this hour glass drains to empty.
But really, it isn't just feeling like I don't belong here. I also feel cheated and betrayed. I could've actually had a loving dad in my life and I could still have my childhood friends in my life instead of still feeling as if I'm still being punished. I could've even had a older sister.
We are all cheated on and betrayed, that's just how life is, and we all need to learn to deal with disappointments and emotional pain and still have a good life. Can I offer you my favourite quote slightly paraphrased as I don't have the book handy right now:
NO ONE CAN TAKE AWAY FROM YOU THE FINAL FREEDOM: THE FREEDOM TO DECIDE HOW TO RESPOND TO ANY GIVEN SET OF CIRCUMSTANCES
from "Man's Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl, a concentration camp survivor who was also a psychiatrist.
I think you're depressed and although you may need therapy or some other treatment, you could start to heal by yourself by not focussing on what you don't have in your life and being grateful for what you do have.
I would offer you a hug but I don't like touching people.
Stop hating yourself and/or your situation and find a way to dig a hole that leads you out of this place.
U know one of the most important things that gaming taught me...
Is the fact that if u fucked a game up, u try again, restart the level.
But...
If the game is too fucked up to begin with, u stop playing, quit the game.
And that's it for me, I Quit.
If you have other games to play, then maybe you quit that easy, but when it comes to life this is your only game you have so you try harder! If it's too fucked up usually you haven't figured it out yet. So you keep trying until you figure something out. If you've tried everything you know of, but it's still fucked up, then you have to look for some help along the way. Sure you can quit, but it's not like you can go find another game. That's it! So quitting does you no good.
You mean that's what YOU do. No one is obliged to "try harder!" That's an imperative you've imposed, not nature. And how insulting: "If it's too fucked up usually you haven't figured it out yet." Tell that to the millions of people whose lives are shredded due to wars in their regions, government corruption that facilitates lack of food and potable water, rapes and brutalities from wandering gangs, abandonment after the death of parents...
And what evidence do you have that quitting does people no good? If the alternatives are sticking around and definitely experiencing pain, or quitting and possibly experiencing nothing--including pain, then quitting may indeed do someone good.
"Tell that to the millions of people whose lives are shredded due to wars in their regions, government corruption that facilitates lack of food and potable water, rapes and brutalities from wandering gangs, abandonment after the death of parents..." Well first off, you're taking it to an extreme because I don't get the feeling Ace09 was speaking in the same context. I do see what you're saying though and you are correct. Of course there will always be exceptions to the rule. Circumstances will always change based on the situation. For example, if somebody is terminally ill with Cancer with no chance to survive, then yes, I agree quitting would be a good thing to do rather than causing unnecessary suffering.
It sounds like you're depressed. You should should see a therapist and don't listen to the person above that says no doctor or medication will do it for you. Sometimes it takes a while to find the right med or the right talk therapist or both, but one or both of these things can make a difference. I'm on meds. My depression is neuro-chemical. The meds work well. I feel very good and not depressed. Also, there have been numerous times where talk therapy has helped as well for me.
I'm sorry to hear that you feel as shitty as me. Wouldn't wish that upon anybody. I live a pathetic life, and in the last few years it has progressively gotten worse. I've reached my all time low and it has started to affect my health. Lately the days have been tough. Although, what keeps me going is the thought that there always HAS to be some hope because there's no way to tell what the future holds.
This person's problem is as valid as anyone else. You're being dismissive... you have no clue what it's like for this person to feel how he/she feels. You also have no clue of this person's socio-economic status, their history, if they were abused, raped, tutored or even if they're from the 1st world. Even if none of these things have happened... depression is so painful. You seem to lack compassion.
It shocks me that far, far, far more people don't feel as you do. I mean, in the privacy of their own heads as they lie there in their beds, the house quiet and dark, thinking over their lives, people really find "hope"? In what? They have to know they're dying, and that soon it will be as if they hadn't even existed. And let's not talk about the living hell we humans inflict on each other and on just about all other living beings on this planet.
So what is there to hope in objectively? A few temporary pleasures? Getting through the next few decades without a world war or economic perils or environmental collapse? And if we do, then what? In a culture that hates people over 30, if we survive we'll be ostracized for having had the temerity to live beyond the age of peak sexual attractiveness. And "god" help you if you live to 40 or 50. Most people will either wholly disregard you (unless you have a lot of money to give them) or will even openly wish you'd just hurry-up-and-die.
And the consolation of family is a thing of the past. People marry and get divorced almost like choosing a restaurant to eat out at. Parents grow old and slip slowly into senescence, off the radar of kids far, far away, lucky just to find a relatively physically pain-free death.
Not to sound morbid or dark, but objectively speaking, what the hell is there to have "hope" in?
What seems to be bothering you?! Care to elaborate on it? Do not be with out hope
You are not alone.
Everything is convoluted and corrupt in the world, presently.
There are many, many people who are no longer reasoning or rationalizing properly. This is due to a significant series of astronomical events, of historical proportions.
Keep yourself safe, and hang in there! We need you!
Many, many people will die soon, and they don't realize it.
Hahahaha, "Many, many people will die soon, and they don't realize it." Isn't this just business as usually? Pretty sure a lot of people die everyday that don't see it coming. Sorry but I kinda doubt anything happening on our tiny little rock in this giant universe could be considered significant in the grand scheme of things.
EVERYTHING is corrupt and convoluted? Not in my world.
Many people not using their reason isn't new and it's not due to anything astronomical.
When have there not been many many people about to die and who don't realise it?
A final question for you: what help to a troubled person are vague and meaningless newage (rhymes with sewage) generalisations?
You may be getting depressed, try and do something productive that you like before resorting to meds. Sometimes these stages are just transitory.
You will eventually feel better if you keep trying to.
"If you're going through hell, keep going."
The difference between can and can not is only 3 letters, and those 3 letters determine your life's direction.
You can have a life, if you choose to. You can not if you so choose.
Your choice.
While I do agree with you at some extent, this mentality is incredibly hard to see from the perspective of a depressed person. In my opinion,to be able to choose to go ahead in life one must have hope.
I spent many years alone and at survival level; day to day. One day I tired of it and got off my ass and refused to allow the depression to rule me any longer.
No doctor or medication can do it for someone.
As I said, "The difference between can and can not is only 3 letters, and those 3 letters determine your life's direction." Three silly little letters. To wake one morning and not allow those three letters to rule one any longer. It's not easy, but life was never guarantied to be easy.
You really don't understand the nature of depression in my opinion. Both meds and therapy have helped me come back to who I am... happy and hopeful. You certainly shouldn't be discouraging someone who says they feel hopeless from getting help. We all need help sometimes and we can't always help ourselves.
18 years of depression and I don't understand it?
That's quite a statement.
But hey, whatever works for you, right. But the meds and doctors can not make yo change; only you can choose to do it.
Most often the meds only cover up the symptoms; they certainly are not a cure, even you must understand that.
I don't doubt that you'd understand your own depression after 18 years of it, but that doesn't mean you understand anyone else's.
I've had depression off and on for most of my life and have learnt that sometimes I just CAN'T move out of it and need some therapy type help, but never medication as I hate being more lethargic and apathetic than I already am.
It's taken me years to get to a point where I can tell myself "this will pass" because it always has, and to know that I will get so bored with being miserable I'll find some tiny way out of it and then built on that.
I have been very lucky in my life to have found good counsellors at different times when I needed them, and learned a long time ago to avoid the pill pushers and the quick fix therapists.
I wish OP luck in whatever search h/she undertakes to move out of depression, because it's a boring and pointless waste of what I believe is our only life.
I agree with Ellenna. You can't generalize your experiences with others and many people do benefit from help. Who are you to suggest the OP doesn't try to get it?
Lots of truth in this statement. While everyone's situation is different, in the end no one can save you except you. People who say they have no control over their depression might be right, but that's only because they truly believe that. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. "The person who says they can, and the person who says they can't, are both usually right."