I feel like i have to walk on eggshells with my online friend

There's a long story that goes with this, but I honestly don't feel like typing it all, so I'm just gonna get to the point... I've had some fights before with one of my online friends, and I've always taken partial responsibility of it. But this time, he got mad because not only did I not send him an e-card for Valentine's Day, I didn't respond soon enough when I got his. When it comes to e-cards for Valentine's Day, I think of the overly romantic, sappy ones that you give to someone you like, not a friend. Besides, I don't even think about e-cards. I've only been sent a few throughout the years, so they aren't at the forefront of my mind.

When we met in a chatroom a few days ago, he almost immediately got angry at me because of it, and honestly, I had it. I realized that I have to walk on eggshells with him, and that I've been doing that for a while, and honestly, it's ticking me off. I accused him of this, but he just said that I wasn't being "caring" or whatever, and I was just completely flabbergasted- because not only was he accusing me of these things over something like this, just the fact that he said that I wasn't caring, or even suggested that I was a terrible friend to my other friends in general proved to me that he didn't know me as well as he thinks he does.

Like I said before, I feel like I have to walk on eggshells with him now, because I have no idea what can set him off, or what makes him angry. I now feel like I can't be myself around him without thinking constantly that I might hurt his feelings.

I have no idea what to do about him. I don't really know what to do in general. I guess I should ask is it normal that I feel like I now have to constantly be wary of what I say, but what I really, honestly want to know is how I should deal with this situation.

Voting Results
12% Normal
Based on 42 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • Jweezee

    Do they make a "fuck off" e-card? Give em' that.

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  • kellstar79

    Well I'm glad you didn't give us the long version!! Haha no only jokes, I'm confused though... You say you only met a couple of days ago? Is that right? And if so then that's far to early to be feeling like this

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    • Ono

      I think when the op says they met a few days ago they don't mean met for the first time, just caught up with again.

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      • Yeah, that's what I met- sorry for the confusion :(

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress

    it might be time to distance yourself from him.

    it sounds rather controlling what he's doing and you don't even know him in real life.

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  • Ono

    You should be free to be reasonably open with someone you consider a friend, online or offline. Why are you still friends with him? He sounds like a petulant jerk to me. Do you get anything positive out if the relationship?

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    • Alison89

      I agree. I'd cut him loose. Maintaining friendships shouldn't be this dramatic. I also don't keep friends who place unreasonable demand on me.

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  • pandabear1209

    Who cares about someone you met a few days ago on the internet lol just don't talk to him anymore, its not like you know him in real life -.-

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  • Try making an offline friend

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  • Energy

    Get rid of him. I've been in your shoes before. There's plenty of people online who aren't like this. It sounds like you're not getting anything good but stress out of this relationship. Just ignore him.

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  • rin

    Maybe he has a crush on you.

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    • He does, actually. That's part of the reason why I didn't send him an e-card, because I didn't want to give him the wrong impression that I liked him, even though I told him countless times that I don't. I told him exactly that, but he was still mad at me.

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      • rin

        Yeah I'm 90% sure this is why he's angry with you. I say you just ignore him and forget about him. If you've been friends for awhile then maybe send him a goodbye message and don't give him a chance to reply, and if he does then just delete it.

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  • lufa

    The friends you make online mean nothing-there are millions of losers and idiots on the internet-never try to treat it as a real relationship until you've known them IRL for at least a few months.

    I was about to say it's ridiculous to even do that-but that's because I learned my lesson when I was younger and got to know a girl online who I was planning on dating.

    I had thought she and I might develop a real relationship but then I quickly realized how shallow our feelings were for each other-so I learned my lesson from then on. (She and I had a silly argument and things fizzled out from there.)

    Now I never take any online relationship seriously until I've actually met the person IRL a few times and can treat them as a real friend.

    Don't get me wrong there are some wonderful people who use the internet, like myself (hehe)-but always practice caution, don't get emotionally wrapped up with anyone until you've vetted them thoroughly first.

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    • I HAVE known him for a few months. Five or six months actually. Because he was an online friend, I never tried to take it as seriously as I would a friend in real life. He, apparently, did.

      Even if I did ever had wanted to meet him in real life, there's no way it could have ever happened- we live on two separate sides of the country. There's a few reasons I never took our friendship as seriously as he did, and the physical distance between them was one of them. If I knew we would never meet in real life, why would I take it as seriously as a real friendship?

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  • ohplease

    He's nuts and probably emotionally abusive; get away, keep away.

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  • Just_feed_me_Troll_Meat

    Cmon really? An online friend? And this is your dilemma?

    Man I feel for you younger kids when you actually realize what the really real world is like. And I am not talking about college.

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  • xXScYtHeXx

    I'd cut him off, I've played habbo for years and I've learned reasoning with these people doesn't work and cutting them off hurts you and them less.

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  • alv1592

    To anybody saying online friends aren't real friends, that's NOT true! OP's "friend" isn't a true friend simply because of the way he acts. Just saying.

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  • Avant-Garde

    That doesn't sound like a good relationship. I would try to avoid him if I were you. He seems a bit controlling and that's never good in a relationship. The fact that you must walk on egg shells around him is even worse. Either tell him how you feel or tell him to bugger off.

    Good Luck!

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  • perhaps tell him that he is annoying you and give him a chance, he might not know

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  • alv1592

    He sounds pushy and kinda rude. And if you've only known each other a couple days so you're not hardly "besties" yet. Whether you know someone online or in real life, you shouldn't let them be pushy. Either tell him how you feel or just avoid him, whatever feels right.

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  • joybird

    Why do you bother?

    If he's not making you happy, dump his sorry @ss.

    You are a fool to let anyone control you - online or in real life!!

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  • RavagedSoul

    I'm not sure what to vote the IIN for. That your friend is a whiny ass pussy or that you feel like you're sailing on choppy, uncharted waters?

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    • Alison89

      Yeah, a lot of the posts are like this where it's hard to tell what's being asked.

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