I don't know what is happening to me

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4 Comments

I'm 17 years old and i'm too nervous about school this year, because i have my finals. I study all day (most of times), teachers say that i'm too good than the other kids, and that i'll do well. But i'm still too nervous. I also had some panic attacks lately. 2 years ago, lots of things happened in my family (dad cheated, mom got crazy and depressed, sister got depressed and then a little bit crazy) and now things are calming down (somehow okay) it's just sister is a bit crazy (have said that she wants to kill herself) and i feel insecure and scared all the time, that i might lose people i love, or that she will may hurt me (she has tried). I even had problems at school with the kids some years ago. They were all making fun of me and i totally felt all alone all this time (wanted to kill myself too).
And this year, i was all perfect (except from scared). Everyone was telling me that i have been too good and that i have changed, it seems like i finally love my self,

but yesterday something happened. I suddenly felt like everything around me is fake. Like i'm alone in a dark place, and everything (people, things) around me are illusions, they don't exist. Their voices were getting louder and i was feeling all alone. But it felt like a dream (nightmare actually) and i got more scared than i have ever felt. It's like i'm dead or something, everything feels like they don't exist in reality. I feel too empty. I don't know what happened. I told my parents about this and they got really worried. I also had too many headaches and i was feeling too dizzy this weekend. I don't know what's going on. I know, i sound like a freak, i maybe am, but i feel too scared right now, and i don't know where to turn to.

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 14 votes (7 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • Koda
    9 years ago

    It sounds like you might have a panic disorder with dissociative events. I, too, have anxiety and dissociation problems. Whenever you feel separate from reality, like you're living in a dream or outside your body somehow, that's dissociation. It doesn't mean you're psychotic or hallucinating, it's sort of a coping mechanism that back-fired.

    You'll need to talk to someone about ways to handle your stress so that it doesn't take you to that dark place. I don't know if you've ever had a very severe panic attack, but it's not a fun time. Panic attacks can trigger dangerous physical side effects such as fainting/sudden drop in blood pressure, heart attacks, strokes, vasovagal attacks, dangerous immune responses that mimic going into shock, etc.

    If you ever start panicking and feeling like you can't breathe, or feel light headed, tingly in your temples, dizzy, or start to hallucinate, tell someone immediately and focus on slow deep breathing until it passes.

    Meanwhile, try to put things into perspective and focus on the things you're grateful for and realize that even if you failed, it's not the end of the world, and that you always have a second chance. (:

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  • suckonthis9
    9 years ago

    Yes, they are doing this to us, you are not alone.

    I do not know exactly what the cause is, but it is like a drug addiction that causes a Mass Attention Deficit Disorder.

    Please keep in touch with me.

    Please reply and let me know where you are (generally).

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  • WhiteStallion
    9 years ago

    I was also shit nervous in my last year...especially when it came to the latter part of the year but when the year finished I felt like it was all a breeze. You should try some calming medication for the nerves and just learn to trust yourself and be confident because at that stage of your life with all the unnecessary hype you need to take everything in calmly. You say your family problems are settling down so use that to your advantage. Forget your past problems, insecurities and focus on what you're gonna do to succeed or this panic attack cycle is just going to renew itself.

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  • ucipher8
    9 years ago

    When i was in high school, i wanted to be one of the cool kids. Latest fashions, slang... And then i got high for the first time, with marijuana.

    Being an introvert, marijuana gave me and myself a companion to listen to.

    A logical conscience that wasn't just "my conscience".

    High school is a rough period for anyone. What happens in your life, my life or anyone else's for that matter is really just, life in general.

    I don't know whats going on with you, i dont want to tell you to be optimistic and (although i am) i dont want you to be pessimistic.

    Hopefully you can make it past high school. Afterwards, life gets better ONLY because life after high school can still be like high school...

    It's just the experience that you personally have had and the actions you take as an adult under the law.

    I wont wish you luck on your life, and i apologize for not really offering any kind of helpful advice.

    If anything, after high school. I personally decided not to "grow up". I still believe in righteousness and social justice. and i live check to check (and i dont have a college education). I enjoy my life by fraternizing with the people i work with as best i can. I try not to involve myself in things that are beyond my attention and i try not to embarrass myself in public (even though i do)

    Im just grateful that im not homeless and that i have beer, cigarettes and food tonight. That i may occasionally puff that magic dragon and shake hands with my logical self. Catch up on my favorite television shows, or find new ones. Find new music.

    Enjoy the cards i've been dealt, without having to feel like i absolutely lost it all in a single hand.

    Actually i know whats happening to you and it happened to me to.

    Life caught up with you and now, you can either keep up with your life or, keep up with life itself.

    Its not easy. It has its moments though. It really does.

    Thats it.

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