I don't care about anybody unless they are beneficial to me?

43% Normal
5 Comments

It just occurred to me, after years of wondering what I was thinking, I really don't care about anybody unless they're beneficial to me in some way. It sounds selfish and horrible, and it is, but I don't know who to talk to about it without being judged.
I've always had a problem with wanting to control people and be a bossy cow, and I've kept it to myself for so long that thoughts about chucking someone to the side because they don't want to help me with something or whatever, are completely natural now. Everyone thinks I'm this lovely person but I'm not, because in extreme circumstances, I don't care if my friends die, as long as I'm still okay. I'm not 'selfish', because I love giving people gifts and making them happy. But, then I get into the moods where I just don't care. And that's almost every minute of every day. I just don't care about anybody.
After my mum died 4 years ago, I just gave up with education and a lot of people. Could this be related? I feel like I've become cold after my mum died?
Is this normal? Please help.

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43% Normal
Based on 47 votes (20 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    "But, then I get into the moods where I just don't care. And that's almost every minute of every day. I just don't care about anybody."

    If it's not a constant thing as you implied, then I would guess it could be depression over your mother dying. Just an assumption.

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  • AB1234
    8 years ago

    I think your feelings are far more common than most will admit.

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  • Scullymsw
    9 years ago

    Besides having depression, it sounds like, you seem to be suffering from some very normal feelings. As human beings, we do things only because we get something out of it (good or bad). So we are hard-wired to repeat things that do something for us. And given these times where everyone texts or uses Facebook, it's very hard to feel connected with people. I also feel that society is getting more and more disconnected, so people do things to us just because they need something. It's a vicious cycle.

    Experts say that the best way to counteract these feelings is to give to others. I know... Just exactly what you are tired of doing! Try to selflessly give to others. And then think about the good you do. Focus your anger toward doing something positive. It will help! It's hard but it will help.

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  • mouznahh
    9 years ago

    It makes sense really, it's so hard to be selfless with relationships. People can fall in love because his/her partner makes them feel good about themselves; make friendships only because he/she wants someone to spend time with. Selfish maybe, but normal.

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  • peaceandlovebro
    9 years ago

    Well I certainly don't make relationships with others unless I like them which means they are beneficial to me.

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