I cut myself for no reason
In sixth grade, when I first started to cut myself, I was really depressed and hated my life. You know how middle school is. It's all dramatic crap that's really really stupid, and you look back and are like "wtf? that's wasn't tht bad.."
Well, I cut myself a lot, and my mom found out and took me to a counselor. That never helped but I stopped cutting for about two years.
When highschool started up, I started cutting again. At first I had a reason. My grandma got cancer and it was very heartbreaking to me. And my grandpa's heart condition was confirmed and the doctor said he only had 6 months to live. That's why I started again. They're my favorite grandparents, and it hurt me so bad to hear all of the information. So I cut. ALOT.
My best friend tried to help me and made me promise I wouldn't cut anymore. He meant the world to me at the time, so I stopped. for him.
about 8 months later our friendship had an extreme change and broke apart and he turned into an ass. Long story short, I started cutting again.
Luckily, about a year after, my grandma's cancer went away and my grandpa is still living, and it's been more than a year since they diagnosed he would die in 6 months :p
But now...I still cut. I think it's turned into a habit. I won't even be upset, but I'll cut anyways. Sometimes i even cut for fun. It's like my drug. I'm addicted, and I can't get it out of my system. But just like anyone else with an addiction; I don't WANT to stop.
I think I've gotten even worse now.
I like The Nightmare Before Christmas. You know how sally has all those seams and stitches that hold her together?
Well, I've gathered all these pictures and drawn a full body picture of exactly where all her scars are. Now, I've started to cut all along those places, so in the end, I'll have all of Sally's scars. Some scars don't really show up well, so I'll cut over them over and over until they do. I already have my knees and down done.
Am I becoming too obsessed?
It's like I want to stop, but I don't. Help!?!?