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Okay, I think I have a problem. I think I'm too passive. I don't seem to have a backbone. I can't stand up for myself at all, and I normally rely on others to make decisions for me. I feel like I will make the wrong one, if I try to do it myself. I can't even stand up to the kids who bike through our lawn every day. It's so annoying! Is it normal to be this passive?
What is normal? Is it what society says? I too ma passive and I am working on it. I have some controlling friends and my daughter is controlling so I have a lot of opportunity to work on it.
Passive people have a gift and that is the gift of love for others. That is a good quality. We need to learn to stand up for ourselves because we are just as important as that other person.
Take small steps. What works for me is talking to people out of love. LOVE CONQUERS ALL! Bottomline, it's God's greatest gift...So talk to that person that talks down to you or is harsh in their tone and tell them how you feel. It works for me. It may not work in all instances but you can pat yourself on the back because you did the right thing.
All we have is today! So do the best you can for today and put God first and you will see that it will all work out.
Good luck my friend and God speed!
Ugh me too. Im too passive and too nice. I have trouble saying no to people. I know how you feel and I wish I knew the answer but you have to force yourself to just not take crap anymore I guess it may get easier over time.
It's about speaking the truth that will bring you confidence. Just do it. Wants you're in the door you can always be confident. Just tell em! They'll listen! You're a person too! Try not to be a dick and they'll listen.
It's good.
Go with the flow, dude. It's an ancient Zen wonder. Go with the flow. I'm fairly passive, too. I'm the same--don't like to be the leader, kind of hang low most of the time, very laid back and usually people don't get to me.
I had to work on passivity, too. My mother allowed my dad to push her around unmercifully. I decided I wasn't going allow that to happen to me. It's hard to change your nature but necessary.
Learn to from passive to aggressive in a split second 'cause sometimes it's neccesary.
Kenpo, xing yi, kara te, etc will teach you this.
I disagree with the previous comment, I think it's healthy to at least know how to be more assertive. Female or male. I think you should give it a try even if it's a bit unnatural, because it sounds like you aren't happy or confident with yourself this way. If you're afraid of making decisions, you'll never get a feel of it if you never try it!
aka submissive... Just try to be happy until you meet someone who will take care of you and tell you what to do.
If you are girl, just be sweet and kind to others. Submissiveness is relatively normal, and widely acceptable. For guys, a little less so.
What? So just because I'm a girl I should be submissive! Hell no, I'll do what I want. Don't listen to this guy, I am like you. But it's not good. I have been slowly learning to stand up for myself. If you let people push you around they will have no respect for you and you will end up being like my father, who told me he wishes he would have been less passive and taken more action. I will not follow in the same footsteps. You shouldn't either.