Huge age-gap

42% Normal
18 Comments

I'm 19, he's 37 and we're working at the same company. He likes me and he makes it incredibly obvious (he has almost told me) but yet he has a 9-year-old daughter with whose mother he's got a divorce since 2012. I cannot lie, sometimes it feels good to be around, some others it can be awkward without end. At first I didn't like it at all. He has a high place in the company, so whenever he was saying something I didn't like, I pretended that I didn't hear him for no troubles to be caused (I was also afraid to tell someone from the company or my family). Now that I see that he's really trying for some reason -although I can't get this reason- I felt... flattered(?) let's say... and I smile to him a little bit more, but no, I can't be with him. I'm not even attracted by his looks, even if I tried to overlook the huge age-gap between us and the fact that he has a child. What do you think guys?

Voting Results
42% Normal
Based on 38 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 18 )
  • riffraffy
    7 years ago

    Attraction is non-negotiable. Everything else might as well be an excuse to either confirm or deny it. It's why so many women stay with abusive husbands that to them seem like great guys. They stay because they're attracted.

    And so concerns about age just stem from the lack of attraction you feel. It's definitely fine, and it's normal to feel flattered.

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    • Earthy
      7 years ago

      That was actually very helpful and nicely composed. Thank you!

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  • yesnomaybeso
    7 years ago

    Although my friend's parents are 72 and 51 (the mum is younge, they got married when he had three kids already; and they are very much in love), so I don't think that's the most important thing, but you don't seem to like him!!!

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    • Earthy
      7 years ago

      I'm by all means flattered, but that's it that's all! We talked about it, I thought I had made myself crystal clear, but he keeps on trying and these days the problem has grown even bigger... he tried to get closer and I can't tell anyone because I'm afraid, but at the same time he leaves me with no other option...

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      • yesnomaybeso
        7 years ago

        Oh I understand. So it's more like you dont know how to say no, right?

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        • Earthy
          7 years ago

          I've told him straightforward that he can't expect anything from me. He knows that as well, but yet he keeps on trying... so what is there left to do?

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          • yesnomaybeso
            7 years ago

            Isn't that kind of harassing though? You could get him in trouble

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            • Earthy
              7 years ago

              Yes indeed, that's why I said that I tried to ignore it at first...

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  • Dreamsao
    7 years ago

    If you don't like him like that and you don't want to use his position in your company, don't date him. Simple.

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  • DaddyLovesHisPussyYoungNHairy
    7 years ago

    You should do what your heart tells you to do

    but here is few things you gotta consider

    1.) You seem not to like him cause of the age gap

    2.) You seem not to be attracted to him

    3.) You seem too picky and it might be mistake

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    • Earthy
      7 years ago

      I am picky in general, but why might that be a mistake?

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      • DaddyLovesHisPussyYoungNHairy
        7 years ago

        One thing might make you seem picky and you quote

        "I smile to him a little bit more, but no, I can't be with him. I'm not even attracted by his looks"

        If a girl would tell me this, i would run and stay
        away from her.

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        • Earthy
          7 years ago

          Yes, I also mention that sometimes it feels good to be around. That's because after all this effort I can see that he's making I felt flattered. I still don't understand why's that a mistake.

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  • Kookulainamus
    7 years ago

    Perhaps a token boyfriend your own age will shield you from his advances. Perhaps a hot boyfriend your own age will make you feel happier.

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  • BlackyHancock
    7 years ago

    If you are asking about it you must have some level of attraction to him, even though you say, "I can't be with him" and you also say "I'm not even attracted by his looks".

    Sounds like there's something there. If you like him, go for it. If you don't, then don't. Simple.

    My last relationship I was 41 and she was 22 years old. Same kind of age difference.

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  • B-NASTY
    7 years ago

    u should totally bang him for a promotion

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    • Earthy
      7 years ago

      That's using. I don't want to use anyone.

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      • B-NASTY
        7 years ago

        U are not using someone u are using yourself for your own interest

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