How important is it to tell my partners about this?

Quick poll here for all my chiefs.

If I'm dating someone, under what circumstances or how far into the relationship should I reveal that I have/am using performance enhancing drugs/steriods?

Is this something more to not being up or is it something I should be more open about for her sake.

To clarify, yes, they are illegal where I live. Not everything I take/taken is illegal but some is.

Next, they have a rather minimal effect on sexual performance. Its unlikely she would even notice something is different although maybe my drive would be a little different.

Now the one thing that might matter is fertility, it's likely I would be infertile on cycle but not permanently depending what I take.

Right away. (Hi! I'm on steriods btw)	3
First date or within a few hours	3
10+ dates or so when we have became more established	4
Until it somehow becomes relavant	4
Marriage or multiple years of serious relationship	2
Absolutely never	1

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Comments ( 44 )

Nikclaire

4 years ago

Right away. People on steroids are unbalanced and they deserve to know you could fly off into a rage at any point in time. Regardless of where you think you are in your cycles.

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  That is a very uninformed answer. Steriods have not affected my mode noticeably. If my parents who lived with me for 18 years don't fucking notice a girl I just met certainly will not. Effects on mood are something only a small percentage of users report.
  
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  - Nikclaire
    
    4 years ago
    
    I don't care what users report. I won't be around some roided out neck juicer.
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      This question wasn't aimed at you. Does that title say "would you date a roid user?" No. It doesn't. That's not my mf question.
      
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      - Nikclaire
        
        4 years ago
        
        My first response answered your "mf question". You weren't happy with it.
        
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        d0esnormalmatter
        
        4 years ago
        
        And that response was based on the false information that steriods significantly impact my mood.
        
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Tealights

4 years ago

"Eh baby, you like those terminator movies? Let's just say I'm following in Arnold's footsteps and I'm gonna be a star! Maybe governor, but no maids though. What do ya say?"

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Haha funny. Not gonna be nearly that big or be on that much juice.
  
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  - Tealights
    
    4 years ago
    
    You do you. Be sure your doctor knows though, especially when you do decide to stop using it, because he/she can help with the withdraw symptoms if present.
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      Chief, I can't tell my doc everything bc some of this shits illegal. There will always be some withdrawal symptoms but there is some drugs you can take to mitigate them..
      
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KholatKhult

4 years ago

Considering working out is such a big part of your life and you seem to take steroids pretty seriously, I figure it would come up pretty quickly.

You also don’t owe an explanation, but lying or sneaking around it is disrespectful to a partner.

If your fertility is affected it’s a much bigger deal to let them know. If you ever decide to take a relationship seriously and they are hoping for children, going through the extra steps for pregnancy is a huge thing.

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  If you mean "take seriously" as in take a lot, you would be wrong. I have used very little so far compared to most who use.
  
  If I am ever even considering having kids with someone, I would be close enough with them that they would already know. I would never have kids with someone while still hiding something like that.
  
  I know that in general people think you should tell your significant other everything but I do think there are exceptions. The question really is would they care? Like is it harmful to the relationship if they don't know? That's what I'm really debating with this. I'm sure some women would be really turned off by this but yet out of all the ones that know that I have dated before, none of them cared.
  
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  - KholatKhult
    
    4 years ago
    
    No I apologize I knew I shouldn’t adjusted how I said that right after I wrote it out cause I knew it’d get confused. I mean that you’re serious about it like you take time to actually think it out and know your stuff.
    
    I think steroids have a negative enough stereotype that anybody would meet it with discontent. And it can be seen as a little demasculating or a “cheat”
    
    And it can be scary, it’s like being with someone who messes with illegal drugs, you don’t really know what could happen to them
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      Well yes I'm serious in that I make sure to be as safe as I reasonably can.
      
      I think you touched on the main problem though, 99.9% of people think steriods are worse for you than they are. It's really sad. If I tell a friend of mine they say "have fun getting a heart attack at 40 and having your dick never work again. Loser!" and its just not true.
      
      And it's kind of a can of worms if I bring it up to a gf cause then I'll probably have to spend 20 minutes dispelling all the misconceptions she has about steriods and how they aren't actually THAT bad, although ya, still bad.
      
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      - Nikclaire
        
        4 years ago
        
        If you are not responsible enough to tell the truth, and "20 minutes" of your time is too much hassel for being honest, kid you aren't even mature enough to have sex, let alone a relationship.
        
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        d0esnormalmatter
        
        4 years ago
        
        Kid, I have told at least five mf girls. Every single girl I have told cared zeeeero. To them that 20 minutes was a waste of time.
        
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olderdude-xx

4 years ago

You should let her know that you are taking illegal drugs before you get intimate or by the 3rd date (and anything else you are doing that is not legal other than minor speeding and traffic violations - which almost everyone does).

Is she even interested in someone taking illegal drugs? Let her decide.

Perhaps with extenuating circumstances.

This is an issue about trust and openness. Long term relationships are built upon those.

Steroids taken properly do not adversely effect emotional stability. That is why Dr's are allowed to prescribe them to so many people.

However, if you are taking Testosterone you are almost certainly sterile at this point as your testicles need a very high level of testosterone to be able to produce viable sperm (much higher than what is in the rest of the body); and taking testosterone shuts down the body's natural testosterone production which reduces the testosertone level in the testicles to just the body level; which is too low to produce viable sperm. Normal testosterone and sperm production usually returns after you discontinue artificial testosterone (often takes months). Also, long term T use reduces the size of your testicles... which may be permanent. I know these things because I have been on medically prescribed Testosterone for years.

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Incorrect. Permanent sterility from steriods is incredibly rare and considering what I have taken there is about 0.001 percent chance.
  
  All the girls that have found out so far haven't cared. Only a handful and none of them were very "serious" partners but that's there for what its worth.
  
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Aethylfritha

4 years ago

Only if it becomes relevant or is brought up. Personally i don't think its their business.

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Yeah I mean it's their business if I'm infertile because of it but in general I agree. I don't care what supplmembts they take unless it affects me.
  
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  - Aethylfritha
    
    4 years ago
    
    Thats fair
    
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Sad18yo

4 years ago

I’m just curious what you look like? Obviously you work out a lot, and you’re on steroids. Are we talking toned young dude, muscular guy, or full on Schwarzenegger?

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Lol I mean it's kind of difficult to explain. 6'4" 265 at maybe 18-20 percent bodyfat.
  
  https://images.app.goo.gl/ebrhgUfwwyKECAuX8
  
  Closest guy that comes to mind is this mf. I think hes 6'4" 250 or somewhere around there. He is a good deal leaner than me and has more muscle but in terms of size were close. Hes probably 13 percent bodyfat and has idk maybe 10 pounds of muscle on me. It's just to give you a rough idea. Yes hes also juicing. No hes not nearly as big as arnold and neither am I.
  
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Fugazi,again

4 years ago

Just tell them and if they don't like it they can fuck off

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Of course. But how far in, is the question.
  
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  - Fugazi,again
    
    4 years ago
    
    As soon as it comes up. If she doesn't mention it, just shoot up in front of her like it's nothing
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      Oh hey that's a good idea actually lol.
      
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howaminotmyself

4 years ago

I don't understand why you would do this in the first place, but that aside, it will be about trust. Sometimes it comes quickly, sometimes not. How long you wait will be determined on how quickly the relationship advances to an intimate level and you feel compelled to be open about such things. Some may not understand but if you want a serious relationship, you need to be honest about this and also prepared for a bad reaction. And when that happens, keep calm about it.

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  1. Because I wanna be a big, strong mf
  
  2. I agree with the rest. If it gets very serious she will know. I would never hide something like this from someone who really cared about me on a deep level like that. Exactly when is tough to decide by for sure by that point.
  
  One of the main reasons I don't wanna wait too long is in case it's a deal breaker for her. Its unlikely it would be, but if it is I wanna know. Because if she finds out 10 years later on accident I'd be fucked. Nobody wants that.
  
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  - Aethylfritha
    
    4 years ago
    
    Honestly i dont see it the same way as some.
    Its not cheating anymore that getting boob job/ plastic surgery is cheating. We all have goals and if thats what you want.
    My concern would be side effects or harming your heath. But im sure you know/ consider that right?
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      If my wife got a boob job without talking to me first I would have a problem with that.
      
      I would never get really close to someone who didn't approve of me using steroids.
      
      Yes I have considered the health risks and yes there are some. Steirods when reasonable doses in healthy populations are really not as bad for you as most people think. The only noticable side effects my first cycle were acne got worse and so did my anxiety a little bit but that might have been placebo.
      
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      - Aethylfritha
        
        4 years ago
        
        I have to take synthetic hormones for a condition so im not too judgy. Without them id be an unbalanced bitch with hot flashes .
        
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        d0esnormalmatter
        
        4 years ago
        
        If you have a condition that's a total different story. Still if it effects me I'd probably want to at least know about something like that but idk.
        
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  - howaminotmyself
    
    4 years ago
    
    I can't tell you how long is too long to wait. Usually within a year you will know if it's long term or not. The rest is just a matter of how quickly things proceed.
    
    A strong mf.....lol. What does strong mean to you? And by whose standards? Never will I understand that need for chronic growth on a physical level. But I don't need to. I just hope your idea of "safe" is well researched and not made by those trying to sell you something. Or made by insecurity.
    
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    - d0esnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      Yes I know nobody can say exactly I just want some folks to weigh in as I'm considering this.
      
      Like I said on other threads, I have told several casual partners of mine and nobody has cared so far. But still it's very possible that if they were more serious with me they would care but idk.
      
      You don't need to understand that part. Most people don't and that's fine. It's just my passion to get bigger and stronger and I have been focused on it for a long time. Big and strong compared to who, is compared to fellow lifters. I want to show up at the gym and be the biggest and strongest fucking dude. I also have competed in powerlifting before and probably will again, but not a lot, mainly because of steriods. Anyways, its complicated and you probably don't care. This post wasn't called "do you agree with steriods?" for a reason. Anyways, thanks for weighing in :)
      
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      - howaminotmyself
        
        4 years ago
        
        Lol. No. I get that you don't care if I agree. And honestly, I don't have a strong opinion on the subject as it is really far outside my norm. I fucking hate the gym. But I try to be open minded about such things so it's interesting to learn more about the drive itself.
        
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Mammal-lover

4 years ago

Haha. Dnm this is almost cute. Follow the rule we follow. When it becomes apparent it could be something more. Something real you let them know

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- d0esnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  Something more as in commited relationship?
  
  Cause they would definitely know by then.
  
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How important is it to tell my partners about this?