How do you tell someone you're not ready to commit?

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This year I have seen I am not for a relationship my mental health has declined so much from 2020. I regained contact with a guy I went on 2 dates long ago so unexpected.
he's unsure he's ready because he's gotten dumped but we've talked and all of a sudden he admitted he still has feelings for me now he's travelling here for work.He asked me if I would be interested in catching up if he gets time over while he's here and I didnt wanna be rude so I said sure


I feel very anxious... First because of the pandemic but we'll probably stay outdoors secondl because he said he's not ready to start a relationship but I remember he was a relationship type very serious I feel like he's expecting to go in that direction and I have things to figure out I dont want to meet soo soon I dont know how to say that without sounding disinterested I mean it's not like he's round often and I havent said anything about being interested in return maybe I should but that would send mixed signals no.?I dont even have job,nothing. I need to focus on these things first.I cant be distracted by a men and I dont want to because dont have energy to put effort theere.Heeelp meeee

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Comments ( 4 )
  • mouldiwarp
    3 years ago

    You just say it: “I’m not ready to commit” or “I’m not ready for a relationship”, the last phrase is literally what I used. Tell him that you are at a difficult point where you don’t have energy or time or whatever it is from battling personal issues and your decision isn’t because of him, that way it won’t seem like it’s his fault.

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  • russellnb
    3 years ago

    Truth is always the best policy. If he cares about you he will respect your feelings.

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  • Somenormie
    3 years ago

    If you know fully that you aren't ready yet to commit, just like how mouldiwarp and like how RoseIsabella has mentioned just take things slowly remember and keep in mind that this is totally normal for you to have that thought in your head and you may be wondering things like " How will I be approaching this? " and the simple answer is the least you can do is to start some conversation and maybe be open about how you feel for him to understand. For example me I am currently in a relationship for about 2 months, from over time I felt like I am getting there to go commit into that relationship and try to go with the flow, coming from the quote that says that you need to make sure that you flow like water like as of how water flows on the floor slowly. Therefore I conclude this as being a normal.

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  • RoseIsabella
    3 years ago

    Just tell him you like to take things slowly.

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