How do you get the last of the condiments out of the container?

13 Comments
Turn it upside down and shake it. 7
Turn it upside down and just wait patiently. 2
The "windmill" technique (hold it in your hand and windmill your arm) 1
Turn it upside down and tap it. 3
Cut it open and scoop out the remnants with a utensil. 0
Scrape it out with a spatula. 0
Vacuum it out and harvest it from the vacuum bag. 1
Shrink yourself down and scrape it out like a high-rise window washer. 1
Use a syringe. 1
Hire a hobo to do it. 3
Put it upside down in the washing machine and turn on the spin cycle. 0
With the power of sonic waves. 0
Scrape it out with fingers/fingernails. 0
Run over it with a steamroller. 2
Take it on some carnival rides that pull G's. 0
Train a mouse equipped with a tiny squeegee to go in there and get it. 1
Holster it upside down in your waistband and go for a jog. 0
Liquefy container and contents, separate the material as it cools. 0
Return it to the store claiming it had a hole in it, get new one. 0
Use compressed air to blow it out. 0
Threaten to burn the jar down unless the condiment comes out promptly. 3
Other method (please describe!) 3
I don't bother with this. 0
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Comments ( 13 )
  • RyanDeao
    9 years ago

    keep the container upside down from the start and if none of the condiments stick it should be pretty straight forward with the exception of gravity possibly causing it to have too much pressure applied

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  • alextsang08
    9 years ago

    Put it on the floor, and body slam it with the plate right beside. It works!

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    I make my condiments at home and in pots. I've found that its practically impossible to get every single bit out even if I try to scrape it out with a spoon or a fork.

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  • Justsomejerk
    11 years ago

    Skilled knife work or gravity, heat and time.

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  • howaminotmyself
    11 years ago

    I get a really sharp blade and cut the plastic in a fun spiral pattern to get to the goods. Then I hang the dismantled jar from a tree. If it's made of glass, I throw it against the wall and curse at the shattered remains.

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    • dappled
      11 years ago

      Like howaminotmyselflyingsquirrel, I have some very, very sharp knives. No real need for them as I don't know many vegetables with bones but I do like sadistically running through a swede (the vegetable, not the nationality) as if they're butter.

      Same goes for plastic containers of anything I want the dregs from. For glass containers, I let howaminotmyself throw them at the wall because I like to hear her curse. Which, if I know her at all, she'll now commence with.

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      • howaminotmyself
        11 years ago

        Don't be a fuckin prat Mr. Dandypants. Someone might mistake you for a teething cunt.

        Fucking fuck...

        :P

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        • dappled
          11 years ago

          *tickles you behind the ears*

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          • howaminotmyself
            11 years ago

            *falls asleep in your lap*

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            • dappled
              11 years ago

              I hope you took that knife out of your pocket first. Otherwise your nap could become nip and tuck for me. And there are things I don't want nipped or tucked.

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