How do i distance a 15 year old friend without making her feel bad?

68% Normal
6 Comments

Over the years I have turned into a loner. I have this friend who lives in canada I have known her since 15 years and she is super sweet and honest. She was an internet friend who turned into long distance text, call, email pal. During those years there were a few years where we barely talked and at least 3 different instances where I just grew indifferent and didnt talk to her as much or barely reply to her texts. She accuses me of cutting her off in the past and I dont deny that. It is what I did. It is what I do I push people away

I have told her I am a loner and barely interact with people but she doesnt believe it. I have spoiled her with me being a chatterbox in the past. She even once had an epiphany that I must suffer from committment issues but she still contacts me every other day. I think she has a crush on me from the way she talks to me and even said one night she gets the same funny feelings talking to me now that she used to get ages ago. She often wants to talk on the phone but I hate phone calls and tell her not to call or not receive if she calls. She also doesnt believe I hate phone calls because whneever we have talked I have faked being excited and a good listener on the phone

I like her. I dont want her to completely go away. I value our 15 year friendship. But is it really a friendship if I want someone to contact me once a month? Please help

Voting Results
68% Normal
Based on 25 votes (17 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 6 )
  • kelili
    9 years ago

    I have difficulties keeping in touch too. I think that there are friends that you don't need to call/text everyday and where nothing changes,

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    3
    3
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    I think it is good to stay in contact with friends even if you are an introvert. Friendships are a give and take relationship, which you give by being someone to listen. It can't be that hard.

    If you completely isolate yourself you may get bored and therefore depressed. I don't like talking on the phone all the time either but I do get bored if I lose all social interaction. Everybody is different though, but you should really consider if being alone is worth not having friends and ask yourself why you want to be alone so badly.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
  • FireFlower
    9 years ago

    It really hurts to be distanced. And especially if the one who is doing it is not honest, and makes the other feel as if there is something wrong with them.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • Nokiot9
    9 years ago

    I thought u were hanging out with 15 year olds for a second there... lol

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • KeepsakeDoll
    9 years ago

    Just be blunt. Although, I feel as if you've been pretty clear already but she's just not listening...

    You could go to the extremes of changing your number and giving her only your email address. Or you can lie and tell her that you found someone and her constant calling is too suspicious, so she should limit the calls.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • handsignals
    9 years ago

    try...MAKING AN EFFORT!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    -1
    -1