How can this be?

58% Normal

Two weeks ago I started talking to my ex wife. First by phone then in person. She came over to see me. We've been divorced 20 years. She was in my house less than one hour and we're in bed together. We did a lot of the old moves but the sex was good. She moved in earlier today. She's serious about a commitment again but I don't know if I can do this. I got over her once, and that old flame flared up but is flickering like it is about to go out again. Anybody, male or female, who could shed some light on my situation based on your own experience would be greatly appreciated. Is getting back with my ex after so many years normal?

Voting Results

58% Normal

Based on 43 votes (25 yes)

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Comments ( 19 )

anti-hero

8 years ago

She wants something. Probably a place to live since she moved in so quick. Let me guess, she is unemployed and you make good money?

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- Steve2
  
  8 years ago
  
  Hey, anti-hero! How's our good ol' amputated leg doing?
  
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  - anti-hero
    
    8 years ago
    
    Better than your personality.
    
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BlackyHancock

8 years ago

It does happen but it's usually not a good idea. Why rush into living together anyway?

Shouldn't you both take the time and work out if the dynamic that caused you to break up 20 yrs ago is still there?

I have done it a few times but not to rekindle a relationship, it was more about having sex.

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- LittleGirlGagedAndRaped
  
  8 years ago
  
  Exactly. But the merge between former lovers and current fucks will get a womans emotions confused. When this happens there must be an immediate cut off. Your cock is her Crack and it will be fed according on her behavior, did she not come to you?
  
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theseeker

8 years ago

The safer thing to do would be get out before you're in deep shit again. However, you have to decide if that's a risk you're willing to take, and if so hopefully it's worth it. Being that you've been divorced, I'm not sure how you can trust her.

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thegypsysailor

8 years ago

Perhaps you both have matured enough and had enough relationships to manage the pitfalls before they become craters, but I'd certainly go very, very slowly.
I have no idea if the first break up was painful or mutually consensual, but most of us only remember the better things from long ago. Caution, Will Robinson, caution.

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- Steven_Glansberg
  
  8 years ago
  
  Its "DANGER will robinson, DANGER" not caution
  
  Moron as usual
  
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  - thegypsysailor
    
    8 years ago
    
    Why do you have to be such a fucking asshole?
    
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    - Steven_Glansberg
      
      8 years ago
      
      Because you're so unbelievably STUPID that you're actually harmful to society even when you're floating hundreds of miles away from civilization
      
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      - thegypsysailor
        
        8 years ago
        
        If I choose to say caution instead of danger, how is that stupid?
        What fucking business is it of yours how stupid I am? Mind your own damn business. You are no shining example of intelligence, if your posts are any representation of YOUR meager intelligence.
        
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        Steven_Glansberg
        
        8 years ago
        
        Says the hypocrite who criticizes others for "name calling".
        
        you're stupid because we both know you meant to say danger, not caution. You would be a whole lot cooler if you just replied "haha yeah i meant to say danger, oops" but you're not cool enough to say that
        
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Steve2

8 years ago

That is a perfect recipe for domestic abuse and disaster.

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RamennoodleMaster

8 years ago

You should take this chance. Just be aware that the first flame that burned out should not be continued in this next spark. Travel, make different friends, and redo your house, this love is spontaneous and should be treated as such. It will only last if you live with this romance in the same spontaneous fashion as it begun. Take this chance, so long as she isn't abusive or draining psychologically i see no harm in building on this flame.

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Steven_Glansberg

8 years ago

Don't do it. Don't ever go back to past girlfriends. It will end just like the first time.

She only ran back to you now because she made stupid decisions and wants an easy escape from her problems. But your job is to remind her that this door is closed. Thank her for the sex and kick her out. If she was the one who originally dumped you, then rub it in her face now as well.

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LittleGirlInexorablySodomized

8 years ago

You can't get back with your ex like that when it's over its over. It's only a matter of time when the same problems that caused the separation come back. Same shit different century.

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ThingOne

8 years ago

I had a girl friend once. We were both 16 and we had an incredible amount of fun for 1½ years. By age 19, the fun had evaporated, and she dumped me. Thirty years later we met by chance. We were both unattached, and began dating again.

This time, we were both mature and different people than we were in our teens. The relationship deepened, but seemed to follow the same timetable. An incredible amount of fun for 1½ years. Then the fun slowly evaporated and we split up at the three year mark just like the first time.

The rhythms of life are more predictable than you would think.

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