Having an ex as a friend?

Ultimate poll. Is it Ok to be friends with your Ex partner(s)?

also in the Comment section. please consider these factors;
>How long were you together with your ex?
>Does you current partner know about the friendship?
>How friendly are you to your ex?
>Are you frequently alone with your ex?

And WHY are you still friends with your ex?

It's fine to have an ex as a friend(s)	26
my current bf/gf is against. but I'm friends with my ex(s)	4
my ex is more of an acquaintance(s)	12
I do not keep in contact with my ex(s)	20
My ex(s) broke contact with me	3
Other (comment)	6

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Comments ( 23 )

DayTimeLover

11 years ago

I don't have an ex.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  with a name like DayTimeLover. im surprised
  
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  - DayTimeLover
    
    11 years ago | pl
    
    No, no, no. You misunderstand. My name is DayTimeLover because I love daytime. It's not associated with being a lover plus I'm single.
    
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BurnaBaby27

11 years ago

I'm friends with my most recent ex. As crazy as it sounds, I believe he's my soul-mate. We were together for a few months when we were younger and reconnected in August. Things were rocky between us because neither of us was happy with the hand life dealt us, so we called it off. We're both doing a lot better. We still talk daily and have fulfilled our "humanly needs" with others (with a male bestfriend on my end, him with a few different females), but I'm sure in the future if things work out, we'll be together. If not, we'll always be in each others lives.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  some would say that's sweet however. Don't you think it's unfair on him and yourself? Because if you keep holding on the dream of "being together".. you will always compare new love interests with him.
  
  Sounds like your scared of the future. Don't hold on the past for comfort, you need to move forward. Because if you meant to be together, then it would of already happened by now.
  
  if anything you are in what many males would consider the friend zone.
  
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  - BurnaBaby27
    
    11 years ago
    
    I'm cool with the way things are. I'm not necessarily holding on to the fact that I think we'll be together in the future, it's definitely a possibility if we continue to straighten out our lives.
    
    My ex wants to be with me, but he is a bit of a pathological liar. Lies for no reason at all, and I find it hard to believe him at times. He also suffers from bipolar disorder so I find that I'm very lenient with him when maybe I shouldn't be. So I'm kind of the one who's friendzoning him.
    
    I'm actually in the process of pursuing my male best friend. I friendzoned him in the past, and we grew very close and only started sleeping together recently. He doesn't know that I have developed deep feelings for him though. They both know about each other.
    
    This sounds like a therapy session lol, all in all, it's probably best that I just remain single for now and just go with the flow and not force anything.
    
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Jeaneathean

11 years ago

Gladly be friends with any of my exes (bar one. She knows who she is, and why....) In touch with most of them on Facebook, see one regularly and another one seldom.

My present lady has no problem with this.

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kingofcarrotflowers

10 years ago

It might work for some but not for me. I stayed friends with my ex despite everything she did and even though she broke uo by text because I'd lost the relationship but I didn't want to loose her completely. I had to see her everyday at college and It killed me, she was still being extremely flirtatious with me which made me think we would get back together several times. When I met her she had little belief or pride in herself but as soon as I called her beautiful she changed. For the rest of the year after the break up I was wrapped round her finger. Not only that but it's heartbreaking to see the person you love getting over you while your still madly in love with her hoping things will go back to the way they were before

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  10 years ago
  
  dude i know that feel. Some bitches lack empathy and think guys are just walking penises without emotion and heart.
  
  girls like that end up fat @ age 18+
  
  situations like that, normally make your skin thicker, and hopefully you won't fall for the same trap again.
  
  So in a way you can thank her for teaching you a valuable lesson
  
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Caryopteris

9 years ago

I want to be friends with my exes, but they literally keep trying to initiate sex. It is very disappointing because as a woman, I could be perfectly happy being friends. I could enjoy feeling sexy without taking action on it, but guys don't enjoy that feeling.
I don't need sex with them because I have a boyfriend, but I would enjoy more friends. I guess guys are nice because they hope to get sex. It's disappointing.

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ScooterNyne

10 years ago

I don't have any ex's but my parents divorced awhile back and they are still friends. To me that seems like a really nice way to go about things. When two people understand that they aren't meant to be with each other but still realize they are good people, to me it's just a really great way to go about it. The more people you can keep in your life the better is what I say.

So despite not having the experience myself id still say it's a cool thing to be friends with an ex.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  10 years ago
  
  I respect that (same situation with me) . But do you think your parents would of still stayed friends, if children weren't involved?
  
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  - ScooterNyne
    
    10 years ago
    
    It's hard to say. It's impossible for me to predict an alternate outcome where i don't exist. I would lean toward saying yes though.
    
    Plenty of Ex parents can't stand talking to each other even though they must in order to communicate child care an all that stuff. On top of that, they let the courts decide basically how the families lives are going to be lived from then on.
    
    With my parents, they just split up peacefully, let me and my brother choose where to go, then agreed on child support terms based on that. It's been almost 7 years of that and they still manage to laugh on the phone whenever they talk about arranging stuff for me or my brother and there is plenty of small talk in between.
    
    That's a very good question though. There are people out there who have just agreed to be friendly for the sake of others around them, like children. And that is just as admirable as those who would be naturally friendly to an Ex. It all depends on the situation you're in but doing what will bring the most happiness to you and the people around you seems like the way to go.
    
    And there will be certain situations where never communicating with someone ever again IS the best way to achieve the most happiness. But let that be your last option not your first. I would ensure that a regular friendship couldn't be established first before I shut someone out for good.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      10 years ago
      
      i agree with you so much.
      
      being friends with an ex in a situation involving kids. is a real mature and respectful thing do to. However i suspect there are many situations where guys/girls have ex(s) as friends as a 'rebound' if their current relationship doesn't work out.
      
      i guess it depends on the maturity of the people and their loyalty
      
      thank you for opening up on here.
      
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lemonsilly

11 years ago

I lived with my ex for two years. We remain friends and talk a couple times a month. My new boyfriend has no issue with my friendship but my ex's girlfriend is somewhat jealous and complains when he spends time with me. A friend is a friend and an ex is an ex for a reason.

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NeuroNeptunian

11 years ago

So... I have around 10+ exes. This is gonna get difficult. I can't even remember them all.

The ones that broke up with me (all 2 of them) I hardly speak to. One is angry at me for figuring out he had call forwarding (strange story) and the other I'm on good terms with but we don't hang out or anything. Dated both for about 6 months.

My first ex I dated for 8 months. I broke up with him due to him beginning to use drugs and his gang affiliation. We no longer speak. I don't care for him. The guy after that broke up with me. Broke up with the guy after him, we remained friends for years til he got crazy with my.friends/ his friends and family. Wasn't having that.

After him, 1 month, still friends. After him, less time, still friends. After him, 1 year, he went crazy and assaulted a teacher. We speak every now and then but I broke up with him for a reason. He's crazy. After him, 1 year, still friends. After him, 6 months, broke up with me. After him, around a year, he cheated on me (so did the first one) so I left him. After him, my husband and we're still married. There are a few I forgot to add, I'm realizing now.

Staying friends is cool, just so long as you remember why you two broke up in the first place.

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SangoNyappy

11 years ago

My ex and I are good friends now. Actually I'd say we talk more now than we have talked as a couple.

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myboyfriendsbitch

11 years ago

My boyfriend is slightly bothered that my best friend is technically my ex-girlfriend. But, since we only dated for 2 months in middle school, she turned out to be lesbian and I straight.. he is ok with it.

So, I guess there are exceptions, but I typically would not want to be in contact with any other exes, nor would I want him to be in contact with any of his.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  hahah i guess it's an exception most guys are fine with :p
  
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Darkoil

11 years ago

I've got one ex who I am friends with and we actually carried on shagging for about a year until I got a new girlfriend. I've got another ex who was my first proper relationship and I haven't seen her since we split up, one of her best friends drunkenly told me that her boyfriend won't let her talk to me or go out incase she bumps into me.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  if you ever had a daughter. Would you let her date a guy like you?
  
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  - Darkoil
    
    11 years ago
    
    In real life I'm well spoken and educated with good prospects so why the hell not. :-)
    
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  - squeallikeasacofpigs
    
    11 years ago
    
    "A guy like you". What the fuck
    
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Are You Normal?

Having an ex as a friend?