Hard time during my first semester of college

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6 Comments

Hey everyone, so I'm really having a hard time right now. I just started my freshman year of college at the end of August and I'm living 4.5 hours away from home in the college dorms here. I have 2 Roomates who I do not click with at all and we all barely speak. One of them I do stuff with occasionally and hang out with the same people mostly but now she has been going places and not inviting me. I have no idea what I did to become excluded like this. Also, I haven't made any other friends besides my ROOMATE and a few of the girls she knows. No one ever tries to talk me or ask me to sit with them while I eat lunch alone. I am a fairly shy girl but I'm by no means rude or stuck up. I am a very caring person always looking to help others. I try not to feel so sad all the time but I'm just having an awful time here. I couldn't wait to go to college and live away and now I just want to go home. I even joined a bunch or clubs hoping I'd make friends but everyone keeps to themselves or only talks to the people they know. Can someone please help me come up with some changes I can make to make my time here eaiser for me? Maybe it's me that's the problem? Is my shyness holding me back? There are just no opportunities for me to meet people I can be friends with. I would appreciate anyone who helps so much! Thank you :)

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96% Normal
Based on 24 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • themoonmelts
    8 years ago

    This sounds literally just like my story! I am a sophomore now, but my first semester, I was placed with two roommates who were friendly at first, but gradually became extremely exclusive and snooty. I was a bit shy and didn't gain many real friends in my first semester. In my second semester of my freshman year, I got to know my now best friend and roommate (who had been in my history class and lived on my hall) and my boyfriend (who I met through mutual acquaintances and attending the same club on campus), both of whom I wouldn't give up for 100s of superficial friends! So don't give up, lovely, and teach yourself to keep reaching out! You truly only need a few good friends to make it through college (and that's all you'll have time for, really). Hey, if all else fails, befriend the incoming freshmen during your sophomore year. :) Heaven knows some of them will need friends and direction as much as you do now! Use your experience to help the newcomers have a better first year. Good luck. :)

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  • green_boogers
    8 years ago

    Parties are the answer. People are more open to suggestion after a beer or two. (Stay away from drugs.) You won't make close friends, but you will feel upbeat and humored after mingling with the animals.

    Go to the library by yourself week day nights and study your ass off. Good GPAs get respect. College seems like a long road. But if you are successful, you will be sad in 4 years when it is over too soon.

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  • CountessDouche
    8 years ago

    Awww don't feel bad, OP. The first semester of college is always difficult, and it's that way for most people. On top of making the huge adjustment of being in a new place, and meeting new people, and not having a network of friends and family there to support you, you have no control over your living situation.

    You've done good by trying to be proactive and joining clubs...you might want to try some activities specifically geared at meeting new people, where everyone there is trying to make new friends, not just socialize with those they already have. Try meetup.com

    Also, you might want to look into doing some volunteer work. I know it sounds silly, but helping other people (or fuzzy animals) can do wonders to make you feel good about yourself and proud of the way your spending your time. It's also a good way to make friends.

    Hang in there...it will get better. College can be an amazing experience, but it's only as good as you make it.

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  • FJK_frm_AK25
    8 years ago

    U gotta b the one to go up n talk to them.idk how to explain how its done u jus gotta put urself out there,I never been a shy person so I'm not sure what ur feeling inside,keep ur ears open n if u over hear anyone talking about something u enjoy or know something about kind of jump in there convo in a non creepy or invasive way,so kind of naturally.idk if I'm making any sense.

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    It sounds to me like this is all way too important to you, at this point in time.
    You came to college for an education, did you not? Concentrate on that and worry less about the social aspects of college.
    Freshman year is ALWAYS the hardest. Smile and don't avoid others, but there's nothing wrong with not having a bunch of friends this soon.
    By next year, you will look back on this time wondering if it really happened, or if it was just a bad dream.

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  • Stand2260by
    8 years ago

    I have the same problem but I am okay with it people are stupid (most of people)
    You won't get friends if you don't talk

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