Giving gifts to non christian family members?

88% Normal

I'm caught in a quagmire. Do I give gifts/money to my children and grandchildren that don't believe in christ. My family for at least 5 generations have been raised as Christian's and have always celebrated Christmas in a pretty big way.
The problem comes in with my kids, all millennials one has said he is atheist and his family doesn't believe in Christ, family of 6, another has left the church doesn't see a need for Christ in her life but hasn't renounce Christ and Christianity. They both are pretty far left on their beliefs. Sexually gender fluid, gay, or bi and pushy that christians are wrong or bad. The other 3 kids and their families follow a somewhat typical Christian lifestyle. Not necessarily bible thumpers but believers and go to church irregularly.

The problem is they all still celebrate Christmas, the first two "just like the season and gifting", however gifting for them evidently means friends they like a lot or their own kids, spouse, bf, or gf. They seldom if ever have bought gifts for grandparents, parents, or siblings, much less any extended family.

Should we as parents still give them gifts since our reason for gifting is to celebrate the gift that God gave us, Christ birth. Should we still gift but trim the amount we spend.

Question is it normal to continue giving gifts to family members that don't believe the reason you celebrate.

Voting Results

88% Normal

Based on 8 votes (7 yes)

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Comments ( 23 )

MonteMetcalfe

1 year ago

If your kids aren't giving you gifts I wouldn't give them gifts but I would give their children gifts as 1Weird Guy said they wouldn't understand.

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1WeirdGuy

1 year ago

I think whatever you decide to do is fair. But id give the grandkids something because they arent gonna understand.

How did they become pro LGBT lefties if they were raised christian? What do you think went wrong from your perspective? I have young kids and I worry a lot about the stuff they are taught in schools and cartoons even. My kid was watching blue clues and all of a sudden a transgender appeared on screen with the gay flags and all. Its like theyre targeting kids and trying to turn them into lefties.

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- LloydAsher
  
  1 year ago
  
  That and schooling. Also kids start out on the more liberal side of the coin so there might be some integrated leanings from the get go.
  
  I was lefty for a bit then moved back right.
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  1 year ago
  
  First answer is college and peer pressure. Both changed as adults, son was going to church almost every week but got hooked up with a muslim Prof and non believe wife matter of fact a teacher at a very progressive school who, when one child at age 8 said they wanted to be the opposite gender she jumped at the chance to put them on hormones and now they have two out of three transgender children all under age 13. The second was also very involved in church, but she ended up in an abusive relationship, she always had some bi tendencies and unfortunately the church people she was hanging with were very judgemental and hurtful. I always try to accept the person, I don't necessarily support the acts but I understand it's not my place to judge. Social acceptance has also taught them the bible is wrong or out dated. Short answer to your question, how did it happen ? Schooling and media!
  
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  - 1WeirdGuy
    
    1 year ago
    
    At this point im going to strongly encourage my kids not to go to college. I feel its a scam unless you're going to be a doctor or something. I make more than double the wage of the average college graduate (as a truck driver) and I dropped out of highschool and got a GED. Theyre liberal training camps now. You leave in debt and settle for a average paying job.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      1 year ago
      
      Got my degree and never really used it. Made high 5 or low 6 figures for the last 20 years. The degrees were actually detrimental at points because when asked for advice or input on a project, a couple people would say, oh you just think you are smarter or better than us because you have those degrees. It's not just college anymore they're bringing all the brainwashing and indoctrination stuff into high schools and through social media, coupled with censorship.
      
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- Anonnet
  
  1 year ago
  
  I had to look up the Blues Clues thing to see if that was real.
  Wtf.
  
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howaminotmyself

1 year ago

I am not Christian but I still celebrate with Christians and give and receive gifts because it is the season of giving. I just don't remind them they borrowed the idea from my ancestors. I like trees too so it's nice they borrowed that tradition too. You don't have to believe in the same things to celebrate with each other in whatever way is meaningful for you.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  1 year ago
  
  They don't really celebrate with us or extended family members. As I said they want gifts/money but they only give to their immediate family and friends. One stopped by to get gifts and pick up a couple plates of food to go and said Merry Christmas then left.
  
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Cuntsiclestick

1 year ago

Give the grandkids gifts. The grandkids shouldn't have to suffer just because you don't like their parents.

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my_life_my_way

1 year ago

I found Jesus recently and it’s good to know that the god hand protects me no matter where I go, almost a feeling of invincibility. I’d still give them gifts though

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  1 year ago
  
  I probably will just feeling used at this point.
  
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darefu

1 year ago

They're going to get your money now or when you die. So if you get enjoyment out of giving them gifts then continue and just pray for them. I appreciate your acceptance of the preferences and not your place to judge. As a bi Christian, I struggle with this everyday outwardly judged and even internally. It just seems right for me and I ask for forgiveness everyday if it is wrong in god's eyes. I believe a lot of straight people should also be asking for forgiveness everyday, for either the lust or so many other sins and temptations we do or give into.

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Anonnet

1 year ago

Normally I'd say yes, there's more to Christmas than christianity. If they're adults, though, never gift anything back, and are actually pushy with their atheism, then no. If you can't even get the "family togetherness" thing working, then there's no point.

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JellyBeanBandit

1 year ago

I don't see why their religion or lack of should be a factor in your decision. If you don't want to get them gifts because they don't get you gifts, then fair enough. You should still give the kids gifts though.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  1 year ago
  
  I give gifts to quite a few people without expectations of return gifts. Including at least four major charities that I give Christmas donations to. So it's not about the return, it's more the hypocrisy. It feels as if they are saying, give me gifts because you're a sucker and believe that crap.
  
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  - JellyBeanBandit
    
    1 year ago
    
    Well I don't know your kids so I don't know whether they'd think that or not. But they wouldn't think that just because they're atheist, only if they were just really mean.
    
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Iambillythemenacetosociety

1 year ago

Sarcastic comment. They're making fun of Weirdguy.

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raisinbran

1 year ago

Yes, you should give them all the same amount regardless of what they believe. Don't create problems because you're petty.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  1 year ago
  
  Wow, their greedy give me,give me, attitude makes me petty.
  Maybe you are right, not receiving anything from them except how stupid religion is hasn't stopped me from loving them. So maybe I'll just stop giving to all my children and just make bigger charity donations.
  
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  - raisinbran
    
    1 year ago
    
    It means you didn't raise them right, sorry.
    
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Anonymous Post Author

1 year ago

So far, always!

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noid

1 year ago

I just want to say that gift is a noun and the verb should be give.

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Are You Normal?

Giving gifts to non christian family members?