Girls: reaction to unattractive male's moves on you?

Confidence doesn't come easily for everyone. When you suffer from social anxiety, developing confidence may be as hard as a dyslexic person studying shakespeare, for example. Or, if you've been rejected a lot, it's hard to feel comfortable reaching out to a girl you don't know real well. And, of course the media doesn't help either. But, thank you for giving an honest and thorough answer. Hopefully, I'm in the minority here.

The trouble is, your last statement "ladies: give the underdog a chance." I've never heard the reverse-"Guys, give unattractive girls a chance." Though it's good that you're happy with your personal relationship. But the pressure to see past someone's looks, seems to be mostly on women. Which you reflect by directing your comment toward ladies.

I think people enjoy it both ways: Sometimes we enjoy our desire of a person's looks (along with his/her personality). And sometimes, we enjoy seeing past the looks, enjoying other things about a person.
----Some people enjoy the prior, more than the latter (and vice versa). Perhaps many folk want to experience both... and explore/ experiment.

It's unfair to women, to cut off half their experience, and expect them to rarely/never enjoy male beauty (visual)- while men are free to enjoy their sexuality either way.... Even if an agreed-on morale is posed as the reason; that it's honorable to see past a person's looks.

Also, society cultures women to appeal to men, visually. But not vice versa. Most men are not attractive (they cut their hair too short, grow lots of facial hair, etc). So there's an imbalance that forces women to settle for less. (I can rarely find a guy I'm attracted to, no matter how often I search). Whether we're attracted more to personality, looks, or both-- is more about each person exploring what they enjoy. Rather than a set of rules telling us how we're supposed to feel.

What? I find this comment incredibly relative. As "long hair" and facial hair are not entirely going to make any guy more attractive to me. My personal taste is short hair, spiked and no facial hair. But even then, the most attractive guys I have dated, could have had long hair and some facial hair OR short hair and fully shaved, they would still look great, because physically, they were just incredibly attractive and there wasn't any specific look they needed to abide by. As someone who did modeling for a long time, I dated plenty of my peers from a shoot, so yes they were attractive to me and my "type", but it doesn't mean an unattractive guy somehow would be just as good looking, lacking the built bodies, great physical features etc that they did. Of course beauty is relative, but there are groups of people who the majority find attractive. No matter what. Good genetic build, is simply good genetics and the efforts people with them impose is also effective.

Not to say my 3 longest relationships were with the attractive men. My longest relationships were all with people who were my type personality wise, smart, could make me laugh and we had a multitude of things in common. All of the guys I chose to date were deemed "not good enough" for me, which enraged me, because people, my friends etc based this fact they conjured up, on looks alone. Even though I loved the relationships, the person, their personalities and intelligence more and really didn't, and still do not, hold looks to some higher standard of someone's worth. I always give everyone a chance if there are base things we have in common and personality traits I adore. Had the "less attractive" men NOT had been as funny, confident, intelligent, fun to be around, had things in common with me, or simply were awkward, there's no way I would have ever dated them. It all comes down to how you present yourself and how enjoyable of a time one can have with you. The best looking guys were NOT "assholes, douchebags", they were just boring, or not my type, intellectually/personality wise. That holds a ton on weight for me. Ultimately, I want to be happy with who I am with.

I appreciate your advice, but there's only so far a long, flowing mane can take you. My hair is pretty long by today's standards anyway. I have never really considered approaching complete strangers for the purpose of flirting. As you said, though, it does limit the potential damage inflicted by rejection.

Fair enough. I'd probably feel the same to be honest.
Would you say that the unofficial hierarchy of 'leagues' is based entirely on appearance, or do other factors come into play?

You like my merch? I got it a hot topic. I am so unique and cool.

I hope none of my male friends ever run into you, because I would feel sorry for them. Looks aren't everything, and hot guys tend to be assholes because they *know* they look good and therefore think they don't have to try as hard.

Is this a reaction to my comment? You ought to read my other two comments above, for explanation.

I'll cheer, as well, for people who prefer to appreciate their lovers' personality, more than appearance. But that does not mean it's fair to pressure women to never desire male (visual) beauty. Read my reply to cuppycake1228.
I said people enjoy both appearance, *and* personality. But rules don't dictate which one a person must enjoy more- (people cannot help what they're attracted to. Romance/sexuality is for enjoyment, not rules).

And I gave OP advice on appearance, in case he (or any other reader) wanted it. With too many gals making themselves pretty for guys, there ought to be guys who do the same. Even if you think it's superficial, it's still sexist. But my advice was not to pressure OP specifically. I don't socially outcast people for not being pretty. But, just because a girl can't help be unattracted to certain guys, does not mean she's "summing him up on physical appearance." Just like a gay man who's not attracted to a woman, does not mean he's rude for making assumptions about her gender.

It's in human nature to search for the genetically strongest partner. Pleasant facial features are percieved as being a sign of good health, so it makes sense that they matter to most people.