Flatmates driving us mental

11 Comments

I came to is it normal, for advise on my flatmates, as I didn't know where else to go to for advise.

My question for you guys is, after I explain myself, if you think we should evict them or not?

Now for some context, my partner and I are two usually overly nice people. And because of that, I feel we get taken advantage of frequently.

The first few months, I had done a lot of the house cleaning. And it took a lot for me to ask the new flat mates to take the initiative to clean up the mess when they're the ones making it.

By then it had been bought to our attention we were beginning to have a rat problem. Which hadn't been a problem for us when it was just me and my partner living here. The flat mate confessed he had a bunch of pizza boxes in his room, as well as other general household rubbish. And he said he'd tidy up after himself, as we could only assume that's why the rats were coming in. But whether he actually acted upon his word, is entirely a mystery to us.

Whenever I bought it to his attention, our flatmate has quite often has outright his girlfriend that he hates cleaning and I overheard this. I could not tell what he had to complain about, as up until then, it had constantly been me cleaning up after him and his girlfriend.

Speaking of said girlfriend, she had basically moved in around the time our flatmate had. My partner had told me when him and our flatmate first discussed living together, our flatmate didn't mention that his girlfriend was moving in with him. And we had just assumed it was her sleeping over but as time went on, it became obvious she didn't intend on leaving. She wasn't paying for staying here, running our water or power bill like crazy. And she didn't make her first pay until June this year, after my partner reasoned with her, that by the looks of it, she wanted to move in and therefore needed to pay her way like the rest of us.

I don't understand how they can make it out as such a burden to pay, seeing as the rent itself is 230. The original agreement was that my partner and our flatmate were to split the bill. But since then, he's asked countless times for his board to be lowered. So now he pays $65. That barely covers a quarter of the rent, not to mention that since they've been here we've had a dramatic increase in our power bill.

They are good kids,I can tell, and as much as its a first for me,this is also the first flatting situation they've been in, also.

Since they've been damages to property due to the couples arguments before, my partner and I are seriously considering giving them notice, but my partner is also concerned about losing our flatmate as his friend.

So sorry for the rant, but what do you guys think?

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Comments ( 11 )
  • Boojum
    4 years ago

    If you adopt the position of a doormat, you shouldn't be surprised when people walk all over you.

    Some "friends" prove that they aren't actually that after prolonged, close contact, and instead show that they're actually manipulative, lazy, dishonest losers. You shouldn't worry about people such as that no longer being in your life.

    It sounds like this pair of slobs are irresponsible and immature, and you're being taken advantage of by them.

    It's all very well striving to be nice, generous, caring people, but there are plenty of assholes in the world who will happily walk all over you if you give them half a chance. You and your partner need to find your spines, and either tell these people to get out or, if you can't face doing that, tell them that you're not happy with their behaviour by citing specific examples, lay down the law about how things have to be from now on and give them one last chance to shape up. If they aren't happy about that, then they're free to find somewhere else to live. If they do agree, you'll need to keep an eye on them, since it's guaranteed that they'll continue to try to exploit you.

    If you decide to share your flat again, you should start out by clearly explaining what you expect of your new flatmate in financial terms and every other way (including live-in girl or boyfriends), and you should reserve the right to occasionally check on what's going on in their space. From how you explain the situation, you're legally responsible for what happens in the flat, so you shouldn't allow yourself to be in any doubt about whether or not their room is being used as a rubbish dump or if they're demolishing the place when you aren't around.

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  • raisinbran
    4 years ago

    'my partner and I are seriously considering giving them notice, but my partner is also concerned about losing our flatmate as his friend'

    God, you're weak. Sorry, but "seriously considering" is not enough. Write the notice now. And don't rent to 'friends' in the future.

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    • Ellenna
      4 years ago

      That is not how a friend treats another friend: assuming you and your partner are the leaseholders, give them formal notice to mend their ways and if they don't do so, kick out these disgusting parasites.

      You're putting yourselves in danger of breaching your own lease with the owners by allowing this situation to continue.

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  • [Old Memory]
    4 years ago

    To quote the great Joseph Stalin, “death is the solution to all problems, no man, no problem.”
    Therefore, if your flat mates are causing a problem, ELIMINATE them.

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    • litelander8
      4 years ago

      I love this.

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    • raisinbran
      4 years ago

      last I heard, murder was illegal

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      • [Old Memory]
        4 years ago

        It’s only illegal if you get caught.

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    4 years ago

    Thanks for everyone who's commented. I seriously doubt that our flatmate will be on good terms with us, should we decide to kick him out. As for getting animals to hunt off the mice, my partner and I aren't yet ready for the responsibility of taking care of a pet. But all are good ideas. As I have mentioned, we are nice and expected from that already to be treated As doormats. But I reckon its time to take a stand

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  • litelander8
    4 years ago

    230 to 65? That's insanity.

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  • dimwitted
    4 years ago

    Kick them out. Change the locks and don't look back. Stop being a spineless turd.

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  • cupcake_wants
    4 years ago

    It's really hard to live with people. I know, I've been through this before with roommates. They don't pay, they don't clean, etc. Ugh... How old are they? They might be a bit immature and need to go back to mommy and daddy, for real. I had THAT problem before too. For the rat problem, maybe get a cat or a rat terrier dog? Anyway, you could just have one more talk with them and tell them if they violate this time, that's it. It can be hard though when you live with the person and can't get away from them.

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