Fear during vacations

50% Normal
3 Comments

So because I have so much stress and worries during school I notice whenever I have nothing on my to-do list to be freaking out about (like during this Christmas vacation) i tend to fabricate things to be nervous about.

I will think of things that I know loved ones would be ashamed of and scare myself into thinking that i am or WILL BECOME one of those things. This may only make sense to me, but my mind will play tricks on me.

FOR EXAMPLE: I might realize how horrible it would be if I were attracted to Kids. I notice how little would everyone love me if I was? Then i will think in my head "Don't think of kids being attractive!! Don't think about kid's being attractive!!" Well obviously when you tell yourself not to think of being something you will naturally think of it.

Basically my mind will play tricks on me. I know that this is not a problem because it only appears at times when i am trying to NOT make it appear.

Although i tell myself that I don't have a problem the stupid voice likes to mess with me, and it does have power over me. I have also freaked out about what if I Became OR AM suicidal, into witchcraft, attracted to people i'm related to, homesexual, ETC ETC ETC.

Just wondering if anyone else tricks them-self out about things they know are illegitimate but still holds power over them.

I typically do not see all the steps to these obsessions but instead i realize them when i am out of the situation. They also don't always appear in the same order. Sometimes I might think a child is cute (like in a little kid way) and then worry myself like crazy. It really is stupid when i think about... please don't over-simplify this by saying that i actually AM GAY and Attracted to Kids ETC ETC because I really don't think it is ABOUT those things... i think it has to do with the fears that come when on vacations.. Is it normal?

Thanks!!

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 30 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • McBean
    7 years ago

    Masturbation is the cure for neurosis. Go frig off today.

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  • callb4ucome
    11 years ago

    this behavior is caused from anxiety and compulsiveness. Anxiety and Compulsiveness are rooted from demons and demonic spirits and if you don't know who you are they can dominate your life...i used to be like this when i was younger I would think about how bad it would be to curse at GOD then find myself doing it out of compulsion.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Hmm, I sometimes do the same things, but it normally involves mass murders, suicides, etc.

    Just take this "ability" of yours, and use it positively. Find a way to use it to help you, rather than worry you.

    Also when you were mentionaing how saying to "don't think about something", you end up doing it? You were absolutly correct. The trick is, don't use negatives. For example, instead of saying to your self "don't be late", say "be on time". It helps, trust me.

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