Falling for a girl when we are in an unusual and (painfull?) situation

85% Normal
6 Comments

Several years ago i went to a private boarding school in Utah. The third year i was there one of the new students that came in as a freshman caught my eye. Even though I was a senior by then and she was only a freshman, we are only two years apart because i was ahead in school for my age. I actually started dating a different girl altogether, but that relationship was on a downhill slope that eventually lead to me losing interest altogether. The freshman girl had been dating one of the other guys at the school and things had been going up and down. By the time it was close to the end of the year, i realized i had a fairly substantial crush on the freshman girl (who was still dating)We got along very well,and i hid the fact that i liked her completely because she was already dating. The last thing i wanted to do was make things awkward or ruin her happiness by causing discord in her relationship. I want her to be happy. I actually ended up getting kicked out before the end of that year (the school was very conservative) So now i was at home taking my GED and starting community college and she went back to the boarding school to finish 10th-12th grade. We kept in contact through Facebook and so we still get along extremely well. I never stopped liking her the entire time. Then just a little while ago after a rather long pause in communication, I found out that she skipped a grade and was to graduate this year. I scrapped together some cash and bought a train trip to go visit the school to see her and some other kids that were still there that i know graduate as well. I actually planned me coming with her over Facebook and she was very excited that i was coming to visit. After i got there we hung out quite a bit (as much as she could with the normal family and graduation stuff happening) Way more of the old students came then we originally thought and we had a good time, but they slowly all had to leave, and finally, me and this girl were the only ones left on campus. She had gone into town so her and her family could take pictures, and i didn't know exactly when she was getting back. I was going to leave to go back the next morning early and i wanted to make sure that i didn't miss my last chance to see her and say goodbye. I left a note to call when she got back if she wanted to say goodbye before i left.I was completely exhausted even though it was only 10, because us old students had stayed up late both the previous nights to try and get as much time as we could, but I forced myself to stay awake hopeing that she would call. She did a little while later and said that i should just come down to where she was staying sometime before i left. I went ahead and walked down there and we hung out for about 3 hours, showing each other different music we liked and talking. I hugged her goodbye and walked back to where i was staying, but when i tried to sleep, I couldn't. And that's what leads me to write this. This whole situation of me coming back, seeing her after so long, watching her graduate. It all hit me really hard and i realized i liked this girl a lot more then i had originally thought. I mean a lot more. It hurts very badly thinking about how in a few hours ill be getting on a train and traveling farther and farther away. It hurts so bad I'm literally sick to my stomach. I don't even know if she likes me in this way at all, and the first time any of the other students found out about this crush was literally this weekend ( i told 2 of them, and they couldn't believe that i had hid it for over 2 years)I haven't ever felt this way over a girl before, and i have had a few past serious relationships. This isn't the same. Its different.

- this is not a sexual/infatuation crush. Its been going on for years, and i don't desire to do things like sex right away. I want it to be real. Not some sort of fling.

is this normal? anyone else with a similar situation?

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85% Normal
Based on 26 votes (22 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Captain_Kegstand
    11 years ago

    Yes, paragraphs next time please!

    And yes your situation is normal, sometimes there is a person that draws you in and you can't understand why. Go with it! Let her know how you feel! If she spent that much time with you there is obviously something there!

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  • plum6
    11 years ago

    I usually don't read stories on this website which are that long but this was actually entertaining, so kudos for that:P

    Anyway it seems to me like you are kind of putting this girl on a pedestal, it all seems unreal now and the need to be around her is much stronger because of the distance and all that, so be careful about that. Spending several hours on what basically was a holiday does not always represent what it would be like in a normal situation since you do not see any annoyances or flaws you might encounter when you are around eachother for a longer period of time.

    That being said, it does sound like you have some special feelings for this particular girl, which I guess is pretty rare especially since you are not around her anymore that often. Seeing that after everything changed for you she still holds a special place in your heart it is worth at least being open towards her with it for sure.

    Adorable story though ;)

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    • needsadvice
      11 years ago

      thank you for taking the time to read and comment.glad that it was, um, entertaining XD i can see where your coming from, talking about putting her on a pedestal.
      It was a short amount of time after quite a while of not seeing her. It's hard to know though. We both went to this school for quite a while, it is boarding school (so you see the same people every day) and it was a very small school (20-30 kids on avarage in a year). I got to know her quite well
      On the other hand, people can change alot in the time that i was away. I know i have. So at the same time that i want to feel cautious and be carefull, i feel excited, like i want to finds out more about her and how she has changed.
      It's hard too know what to do, but im not the type of person that likes to have regrets, and after giving it much thought, ive decided that if i never told her i would definantly regret it, lol
      Plus, im sure im probably not giving her enough credit. Im afraid to tell her cause she might freak out and get distant, but the more i think about it, that just dosent fit her at all in the first place :p

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  • Shackleford96
    11 years ago

    Paragraphs next time dude! PARAGRAPHS!!!

    Yes, it is normal, and I can definitely relate to the way you feel about this girl. This story was very genuine, and I really feel for you man. You should tell her how you feel. I bet she likely feels the same way.

    I may have told this story on here before, I'm not sure. I knew this girl before, and we had been friends since we were pretty little. Her mom and my mom were business partners and friends. She would come over and we'd hang out and stuff, play games, talk about stuff, etc.

    Well, one day she came over, and it got around that she had had feelings for me when we were little. An innocent little crush, but it made me realize that I kind of liked her too. So I told her that. I told her that I thought she was pretty, and that her eyes were very beautiful, and that I really liked her too. I even teased her about how much she had "grown" since we had last seen each other, lol. She was a little embarrassed about that remark, but in a humorous way. She knew I was just flirting with her.

    We got to spend one day together, and about half the night as well. It was a pitifully pathetic amount of time to fall so hard for someone, I know, but I felt so close with her, closer than I had been to anyone for a long time. I wanted to be with her so badly, and she wanted to be with me as well. I could see it in her eyes. We had a strong connection, and it was special. But she held back. She knew that the relationship wasn't going to work out. She knew that we wouldn't get to see each other because of how far we lived away, and she was right. She had to leave the next day, and I haven't really seen her since. When she left, I was pretty devastated. It hurt me emotionally, and even physically. I felt pain in my chest because I longed for her company. I yearned for that closeness that I felt with her that has been missing from my life for so long. I remember it like it was yesterday, and it has been probably 4 or 5 years since then. The first few weeks are the worst, but the pain dulls some with time. I still think about her sometimes, but I know she has moved on now.

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    • needsadvice
      11 years ago

      lol your right about the paragraphs. I cant believe i forgot, but i guess that's what happens when I try to write at 3 am.

      anyway, thanks man. It helped me a lot to know that someone else has gone through a similar situation. I still don't know what to do about it, but i guess ill just have to do my best. Thanks again

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  • EVIL1234
    11 years ago

    Yep completely normal, so you want your relationship to mean something if anything I say HI-5

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