Dunno what to do

Lately my mother and I have been getting into a lot of arguments, most of them started by her. However, I feel really bad because its my fault for reacting in these arguments. And then, my mom calls my dad and complains about me to him, so he tries to comfort me whilst also saying everything Im doing wrong meanwhile Im having a panic attack and really wanting to die or leave the house somehow. I dont know what to do. I hate it at my house so much. I try to leave often but I cant very much. And im so scared for what will happen in the future, and I feel bad for troubling my dad and for making my mom even more upset and having my sister just watch through all of it, I really dont know what to do. And nothing makes me happy anymore, I dont like to do anything. I dont have anyone to talk to about this and its not likely I'll get someone soon. I honestly really want to die, but I hate having thoughts like that. It feels like no one loves me, or even likes me.

Can someone please tell me truthfully if its even worth living anymore? I have met a lot of adults, and a lot have even vented to me, and it doesnt seem like any of them are happy. Is that just how my life is destined to end? Would it be better if I just died?

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 3 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Nobody has it all figured out we just do our best and pretend that we've our lives put together if it makes you happy.

    Life isn't all Hollywood.

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  • Move out asap so you can start rehabilitating your self esteem on your own.

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  • I'm going to give a take here you may not appreciate but might actually help.

    You sound young, and young people can be stupid by thinking they know everything and are correct on everything. You seem to respect your father and he seems to be telling you that you've been wrong during these arguments, so is there perhaps a chance that he and your mother are correct and that you are the one that's in the wrong during these interactions with your parents?
    Before you think I'm just trying to attack you here, just know that I'm trying to sympathize. I was a sh*thead when I was younger, I thought I was right on every argument with my parents but in retrospect I look back and realize that I wasn't but rather too hard headed to realize I was wrong and too self-pitying to accept I wasn't being poorly treated.

    Not saying that it's 100% certain that you're falling in to the same behaviour but I often notice it to be the case with these sorts of posts from young people.

    Can you give us an example of these arguments? Perhaps the argument that motivated you to make this post? Be honest while representing both your side and the side of your parents, otherwise we may not be able to give you advice worth giving.

    Yes, life is worth living. As you grow older you need to realize that the life of a child isn't what life is about, we have far more responsibilities and we won't always have people to look after us like parents, we have to work for our lives and that does cause us to lose some of that care-free and childlike optimism, because at that stage in life we don't really have problems. That old saying of, "Pray not to have an easy life but for the strength to endure a difficult one" is a good way to view how you should grow in to adulthood.

    Life is as good as you make it. If you blame everything on others when you're the one that needs to change then your family dynamic will only fuel your contempt for your relationship with your parents. Also remember that not every battle has to be one. Sometimes when you're correct it's best just to bow out instead of looking for permission to consider yourself correct.

    Family is important. Look in to yourself and honestly ask if you have been correct on everything you've argued about, and then ask yourself if it's worth ruining your family relationships just to argue and win against your parents.

    Good luck! <3

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