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Do you feel it is possible for a couple to make it through domestic violence and still be together? This applies to both men and women being the abuser.
| No. If they hit you once they will hit you again and again.. | 104 | |
| Yes. If it happens only once it is possible to work through it | 38 | |
| Yes. If its happend only a few times befor and not on a regular basis | 17 | |
| Yes. No matter how abusive the person is/was, it can be worked through | 15 | |
| Other Opinion (Add a comment) | 11 |
I'm going to be honest and say yes, it's possible. But I think this is a bad answer because it gives hope to people who suffer with domestic violence. I would urge anyone in a violent relationship to find a way out of it, no matter how much you think you may love someone or need them.
Abusers are behaving like spoilt children trying to find your limits. Anyone trying to push your buttons / test your limits isn't worth the effort. Your partner should be trying to make you happy and laugh every day, not get on like an @sshole thinking they need to discipline you like a child. We teach children that no-one is allowed to touch their bodies without their permission so adults should practice what they preach!
In terms of love... I used to tell my son "it's only your face that saves me smacking your bottom." I could never have looked into the face I love so much and then hurt him in any way - no matter how much the little rascal deserved it.
I was in an abusive relationship for years, being both on the giving and recieving end. I thought he was my true love but in the end, it was not good whatsoever. I cried and cried when we finally broke it off but after I had time to heal, I would never go back. If you can find it in yourself to hurt the person you supposedly love, you dont deserve them, and if they can justify hurting you, they dont deserve you either.
My father slapped my mom 3-4 times (well this happened with years passing by between each time and on heated argument) as i recall growing up. They are till together and pretty much in love, and since they got older their arguments are no heated anymore so i guess no slapping :P
It can work BUT, i will agree with dappled cause it will give false hopes to ppl that shouldn't.
"Other"
I think it will be different for every relationship, you can't simplify it like you've done for the poll.
It's entirely your choice whether or not the relationship is worth the pain. I don't feel I can say confidently that any man or woman in an abusive relationship should 'give up' or 'get out'.
I know for me I wouldn't cross that line and I wouldn't put up with a girl crossing it.
I say no I grew up in a house with domestic violence and no matter how hard my mom tried to make things work it always came down to her getting beat up, she eventually left my dad, I honestly thinks that's the only way out of a situation like that. sadly My sister is now in a relationship quite similar to the one she grew up with.
watch the movie "cicatrizes" which means scars. its amazing and shows how a couple gets through horrible domestic violence
I think anyone who stays with an abusive person was abused as a child so they think its normal...or they are so desperate for anyone they settle for a person who beats their ass...Its too many people on earth to stay with one who beats the shit out of you...
Yes, I've seen it. In more than one instance. Acknowledgment and counseling are sometimes very useful. It really depends on the people involved and their commitment to each other. And sometimes a near death experience is all a person needs to realize they were a horrible person.
no its not the people who commit domestic violence see themselves as victims and will never be able to change there personallitys FACT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Been there done that...Even if physical violence diminishes (never goes away completely) psychological abuse will come in its place (well it was already there so it will intensify)
So really no. You have to go away from someone like that, someone who is hurting you does not love you so whats the point of staying with them.
I grew up in several households containing domestic violence and I wish that I couldve just been out of their as soon as possible. I think that for the health of everyone you should just leave because I have also had abusive relationships and geeting out soon is the best choice.
i believe that anyone can lose it, given the circumstances and stress. The guilt that comes afterwards can be devastating. a person can make a horrendous mistake, yes it's true. it doesn't necessarily make them an abuser. an abuser has a volitile temper, anger issues, is controlling, and selfish. for that reason they will continue to abuse whenever they feel threatened or like they are losing control.