Does this make me a pedophile?

Im a 39 year old male enaged to a 31 year old model,
last year I knew a 17 year old girl, a model, who worked with my fiancee, and was abused by her family. They kicked her out at 17, and I took her under my wing, and my fiancee had no problem with it.

She was very hurt and angry and I was always there for her. The most I would do was hug her and kiss her on the cheek, and when she would cry I'd hold her.

I leased her a Lexus, as long as she paid for the car halfway. I also put thousands of dollars toward her prospective home in New Mexico. After she got rid of her anger and her sadness, she became a beautiful person inside and out, and I would lay awake at night thinking about her, but I would NEVER EVER act on it.
At 18 I threw her a MASSIVE party and invited all of my friends and family. I also allowed her to drink, but only me and her could be alone together, until she finished her drink, then I'd send her on her merry way.

Well, that was my problem.

One day she came home and casually cracked open a drink. My fiancee wasn't home. She started to talk to me, and I would listen and drink as well.

I listened with my hand on her shoulder. She kissed me, and "went for it" . I tensed and put my hands on her abs, as a gentle "shove". She lifted up her shirt and put one of my hand on her breasts, thats when i pushed her away, gently. She acted hurt for minutes, then went in her room, and became unconsolable.

She told me that I was the "man of her dreams" and she thought that I "knew" I was "more to her" than an "adopter", I just comforted her like I usually did, then kissed her on her forehead.

She waited hours later until I was very drunk and kissed me again, I allowed it. I got intimite with her, but we didn't have sex. I took a nap, and I felt like a part of me died.

I felt like I couldn't live with myself. I got the hell away from her.

I told her she needed to smooth out her "daddy issues", then I sent her to a therapist. She wasn't upset or mad, she just apologized and hugged me. I sold her Lexus and bought her a Honda, and put the money towards an apartment immediately. I send some checks her way occasionally, and I pay for her health insurance. I told her I was going to "cut the financial cord" and just pay for her insurance until she found a boyfriend. I also told her that she was welcome to visit, as long as my wife was there, and didnt sit on the same couch as me.

Im currently seeing a therapist for what happened to me. I never told my family. Sometimes I want to kill myself. Ive never been the same since, My bank account and integrity is damaged. Im one paycheck away from losing my beautiful, beautiful home. I used to have tens of thousands of dollars in the bank, not anymore. I guess its Gods way of letting me see the error of my ways.

Thanks for reading my nonsense.
GRT

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 32 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • Schythl

    Okay, two things:

    1. The girl's 18. That doesn't make you a pedophile.
    2. God? Why still believe in such nonsense?

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  • adiasmommy63

    I agree this is somewhat your fault but it's not worth throwing your life away. It's over with, no one is seriously hurt in the end - move on! I say cut all ties ( including financial ) and try to move forward. Good Luck !

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  • Burrito_Dick

    It seems that you wanted to act on it and possibly take it further. You stated earlier that you use to think about her at night. Giving her alcohol and drinking it "alone" come one dude you knew what you were thinking even the "comforting" you use to give to her seems a lil bit sketchy. Now you seem to have turned pretty cold on her when in fact all this is actually all your fault YOU were the adult and from the whole comforting thing and kissing her on te cheeks and stuff im sure you knew what you were doiing and tried to pass it off as innocent. This does not however make you a pedophile, however it does make you seem like a perv and now you beat yourself up and blame her for your fuck up.

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  • pixiecutlover

    Wouldn't say it makes you a ped she's a little old. Makes you a man with poor impulse control who might very well end up in jail. I'd say it makes her something of an ass given what she did.

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  • rydazi

    Definitely doesnt make you a pedophile. You did a good thing taking her in. Not a lot of a people do that. And you didnt let things get out of hand with her. That's a lot of personal restraint considering she is a young model. I know the how that goes, someone close to me is a part time model and she came on to me, and I couldnt resist. Tears me up thinking about it, but taking your life isnt the answer. Just live your life as you have been and you will be perfectly fine.

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  • chicken471bologna

    You should have fucking banged her man.

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  • moomus

    No you are not a peodophile. But why put your families home on the line and all your money for her? Family comes first? I'm not saying you shouldn't have helped her and it's good that you did but why did you let your family suffer?

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  • PoeticDreamer

    I agree with Trusport entirely. I'm sure a large percentage of men would react in much the same way in that situation.
    You are a good person for helping her and for not letting it get any further. You are DEFINITELY not a pedophile as she was in no way a child, she was plenty old enough for sex and old enough to be sexually attractive. The only moral wrongness is in the fact that you were married, and that sort of thing can happen to any good person once. It's continually acting on it when you could just consciously make the choice not to that would make you a bad person, and you didn't do that.

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  • trusport

    GRT,

    You are an angel for helping this girl. You also have a strong ethics and principal to resist her temtaption.

    You did well. You should be proud of yourself for helping her unconditionally and not asking for anything in return (such as sex).

    You lender her a strongest hand and shoulder when she's in desperate need.

    If the world would only have more unselfish men like you, the world would be a better place.

    ----
    And that's how Tang takes it!

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    • Gear

      Why, thank you. Ive been kicking my own ass for the longest time, I never really looked at it that way. I guess you're right, but I never toot my own horn, but thanks, thanks again.

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  • Reina

    Sometimes, in life, people attach their emotions to anything, be it a dog, etc. That being so, we can attach emotions to a lot of things and people, just select the ones you attach it to.

    Maybe you should wait until the therapist has finished with your sessions.

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  • detective

    Don't listen to him. You were the one molested. Go on Oprah and cry about it IMMEDIATELY you overprivalleged bastard.

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    • Gear

      Hahaahaha.

      Overpaid but not overprivallaged, chief.

      Nobody likes a poor sport.

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