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Do you enjoy backwards compliments? Like instead of someone calling you intelligent saying "You are not stupid" or instead of saying you are pretty "Hey I could have done a a lot worse". If the person saying it is being sincere and just not sure how to express what they are feeling. Do you find these insulting?
| No I always find it insulting | 13 | |
| I only find it insulting if the person trying to be rude | 40 | |
| I always take it as a complment | 15 |
well I take them very lightly but it can be perplexing if you think about them too hard
I think people who take backward complements as an insult are kind of arrogant and need to get over themselves.
Sometimes its just people's sense of humour, plus they may have too much pride to come across as soft and sensitive, so its a way of complimenting you without being too deep.
I love these or compliment that can be taken as an insult as well. But thats cause I'm a twat
I always took them as compliments... until I read this post. Now I realize how many dicks I talk to on a daily basis.
I'd wonder what they were hiding that meant they wouldn't compliment me outright.
A compliment is "a polite expression of praise or admiration", and that means making a positive statement. "You're not stupid" isn't a positive statement, it's just a not negative statement either. It's neutral. So I wouldn't feel complimented or insulted, just nonplussed :P
That is a compliment. Saying you are "not stupid" is them trying to say you are intelligent. Some people do this sincerely since they are just bad at expressing themselves. It does not always mean they are hiding something. It is not impossible to have bad social skills. Some do this to be rude though.
Speaking literally, it's not a compliment but a completely neutral statement. There is a difference between a positive and a "not negative". If you said someone "wasn't stupid", you could still be meaning "you're of average intelligence", which isn't a compliment at all :P If I was aware the person was a poor communicator I would take that into account when I was deciding whether it was meant to be a compliment or not, and I would never take it as an insult, but I probably would just remain neutral on it.