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| Yes, my childhood was carefree | 89 | |
| Mostly, but there were a few things I struggled with | 120 | |
| Not more or less carefree than most people's | 62 | |
| No, my childhood was quite tough compared to others | 87 | |
| No, I went thru extremely tough times as a kid | 70 |
My experience: As an adult, I can look back on my childhood and see that it definitely was not "carefree". However, when I was a child, I didn't know anything different, so I didn't think "This is really fucked up, I wish my family was normal." It wasn't until my mid-twenties, that I started to realize the full extent of how unfortunate my childhood was. Looking back, I felt betrayed by my parents and it was difficult to overcome the rage I felt towards them.
I'm in my thirties now and I'm majoring in psychology in university; it has been a life-changing experience for me. Learning about developmental psychology and gaining a sociological perspective has helped me understand the "why" of how I was raised. I can now recognize that my parents, however flawed their parenting skills were, they were doing the best they could with the information and resources they had available to them at the time.
Learning these things has helped me to forgive them and to give them the opportunity to be the parents that they were not when I was a child. My mother is embracing this new experience, but my father is struggling.
This has been my experience, for better or worse.
thisissomuchfun pretty much said what I had to say. I've learned to forgive mine but they still aren't ready to be the kind of parents who would do anything other than damage me.
Forgiveness is easier without constant reminders of what it is you're trying to forgive.
"I can now recognize that my parents, however flawed their parenting skills were, they were doing the best they could with the information and resources they had available to them at the time. "
I've heard similar things before, it's been suggested to me as a way to I guess move on or forgive, and I have to disagree (in my case anyway). I can think of so much stuff my parents did or let happen that shouldn't have happened. They knew it. So how is that doing their best? My parents were unimagineably cruel, abusive in every manner, and they're alcoholics.
Anyway, I have moved on but I can't really explain how. Part of it is that I realized that harboring anger was only hurting me, and much of what happened when I was a kid my parents don't even acknowledge or validate so it wouldn't get anywhere anyway.
I was merely relating my own personal experience. I didn't write that it is the same for everyone (or you), so I'm not sure why you have to "disagree" with me.
A few years ago, when my mum was finally conscious after undergoing brain surgery to plug up her aneurysm with platinum thread, she begged for my forgiveness and said she wished she could have done things differently. I forgave her and she has since been a wonderful mother. I'm lucky (she's lucky too) to be given a second chance and I'm not going to turn my back on it. My father still cannot admit that he was wrong, but his childhood was worse than mine, so I forgive him too.
I'm sorry you are unable to forgive yours; and I'm not telling you that you have to.
I wasn't disagreeing with you personally, I was disagreeing with that advice, as I had said, I had heard it before more than once. It had been suggested to me before, more than once. For me, as I said in my post (in MY case), I disagree with that, and it doesn't make sense. How is someone who is doing a child criminal harm "doing their best"?? That's all.
Not directed towards you at all, I realize you weren't suggesting it to me or anyone as advice, I'm just saying that people HAVE suggested it to me before and it irks me because I don't understand how someone, who knows my situation, could possibly believe that to be true (in MY case). It baffles me that it was even suggested to me.
I simply read your post, and wanted to comment on that part of it and maybe discuss it...but whatever.
It wasn't too bad up until the age of 12. At 12 I pretty much became consumed with making a living, though the work as a fisherman was terrific fun.
Not at all.
Eczema, bullying, ostracism, autism, OCD, allergies, unusual fears, etc.
Also anyone who says childhood is a completely carefree time with no worries is either forgetful or was heavily pampered as a child, or perhaps were really unfortunate as an adult and really fortunate as a chlid.
That said, childhood is a RELATIVELY easy time, since kids are still preparing for the world. However, saying "It's easy being a kid" is like a bodybuilder saying "It's easy lifting 20 pound weights" while lifting 100lb weights and wishing he/she was a gym newbie with the physique of a string bean again. It's easy for you now since you have mastered the skills, but for the rookies it isn't. That's why you have to shelter children, because they're not ready to handle the complexities of the adolescent and adult world.
My child hood was the best. My parents and sibling traveled to different out of state places. I can still remember the joy and excitement of being a child. Its like I was worry free with no care in the world. Almost as if marijuana was in my system but of course I was a child I didn't smoke. My life is now a disaster as a young adult. Im not worry free anymore and wish I wasn't born. That worry free,joyful childhood feeling has disapeared. I look past the clouds hoping to remember what it felt like to be a child again. I only await the day where Im 8 feet below the ground.
My childhood was pretty good, thanks to my mum. My dad was useless and we were relatively poor, but just goes to show how an intelligent and caring parent can make up the difference.
Hell yeah. My childhood sucked. My parents told me when I was 14 that they were sorry they had me. So I packed my shit, moved out, got fake ID and went to work at the Windsor Chrylers Factory Line until I was 49 when I retired.
heavily medicated on depressants from 4th to 9th grade, wasn't fun from the bits and pieces i remember but most of its blocked out, and i will happily blame most of my issues on it
Tough childhood. My parents loved me but being Balkan i bothered by the war. We left but only immediate family. And being a foreigner in the US it was really hard to make friends. Well being a Balkan in the US during the war you get demonized
Funny thing is that i talked this over with my mom and the worst memories are blocked out.
I would say I had quite an eventful childhood but my actions about it were carefree. I cant remember the thoughts I had about the events that took place. I was too young to take action anyway.
My childhood was great until I turned 11 due to a diagnosis. My parents have always been great though.
my mom was physically and emotioally abusive and my father was too weak to stand up to her. she ripped every ounce of self esteem, that I tried to have,away fron me. I lost alot of respect for my dad, for letting her get away with it. don't get me started, I could go on and on.