Did my drugs make me crazy or was i already that way

64% Normal
2 Comments

Well for my whole life i was abnormally shy, by high school I noticed I started having panic attacks in social situations, so after 4 years of that crap i was finally allowed to go to the doctor about it, and was put on Paxil (anti-anxiety, 20mg). I took it for like a year then quit cold-turkey cos I was worried it was messing with my head (due to side effects it made me feel almost nothing). After a couple years I was feeling as low as ever (depressed) so I decided to give it another shot because at least it didn't make me feel shitty, just nothing; and the effect it had on my dreams was pretty cool too. So now I've been upped to 40mg since about a year. I feel pretty good when I take it, but sometimes I skip a day (residual symptoms I guess, strangely I do it almost to punish myself, when I feel I ''don't deserve it'') I go almost insane when I skip a day. I stay awake all night, on the verge of crying, and hating myself pretty badly.

So, is that who I naturally am without the medication, or is that just the withdrawal symptoms?

because that's how shitty I felt all year after I quit, and I'm not sure if it can have effects that permanent or if it was because I was out of high school so I didn't have much occupying my life.

If I quit, will the shitty feeling go away after it's all out of my system, or will it be permanent, or will I naturally feel shitty without them?

is it normal I don't know if it's me or the medication???

Voting Results
64% Normal
Based on 11 votes (7 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 2 )
  • CraneyCrow
    11 years ago

    Paxil and similar drugs have a cumulative effect, so skipping one day wouldn't have the effect you're describing. This means that the symptoms you're experiencing when you skip a day are psychosomatic.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
  • dirtybirdy
    11 years ago

    wow, paxil. I don't remember a lot but I was 13 years old when I was put on that shit. It was new and I'm pretty sure not intended for people under 18. That shit fucked me up good. Not to mention I was misdiagnosed so it was the wrong med all together. After years of bullshit and pills and pills and pills I took myself off and I'll never take another one. I'm fucked up, so what. I've been dealing with my issues long enough to be able to control myself....most of the time.You could probably do the same if you really wanted to. This is just what's best for me personally.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2