Did i do the right thing?

31 Comments

I ran into this girl the other day at a red-box (movie rental place) at McDonalds. We started carrying on a friendly conversation, and I could tell there was a connection between us. She seemed really nice, and she was pretty cute I thought too. Then she asked me my age I told her I was 20. So I asked her age in return, and she told me she was 16. At that point, I got a little nervous and told her that she was probably too young for me. I am definitely not trying to get thrown in jail or something stupid like that.

I just feel really bad about the way it happened though, because I think I may have hurt her feelings a bit when I told her she was too young for me. She seemed pretty dejected, which made me feel really horrible afterwards. I just feel like I could have handled the situation a little better by maybe saying something different. I don't know.

Do you think I handled the situation appropriately, or should I have done something different? I can't help but think that she probably would have been a very fun person to hang out with, and that makes me kind of sad because I don't meet new girls too often.

Yes, you did the right thing.	60
No, you did the wrong thing.	10
Don't feel bad, you were just nervous.	14
Learn from your mishaps and mistakes.	8
Who knows, maybe you'll see her again sometime?	17
Other opinion.	4

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Comments ( 31 )

anti-hero

11 years ago | pl

Wait, wait, wait, someone on IIN didn't fuck an underage girl? I am impressed.

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- [Old Memory]
  
  11 years ago
  
  I propose a moment of silence for this tragic affair :/
  
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  - anti-hero
    
    11 years ago
    
    *bows head*
    
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- Captain_Kegstand
  
  11 years ago
  
  I am impressed as well!
  
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BigScaryRooster

11 years ago

You did the right thing. It's better then getting slapped with statutory rape charges later on.

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- nkwacky
  
  10 years ago
  
  This ^
  
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coolio75650932

11 years ago

shes to young. you did the right thing you cant just date a teenager you know you barly even know her. so any ways good luck in finding love my friend *makes hand look like spock* live long and prosper.

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BlueJeansWhiteShirt

11 years ago

She is way too young for you. Slightly creepy tbh.
Okay, you don't meet girls too often but that shouldn't justify the situation. She is too young. Full stop.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  I am just curious, how is it "slightly creepy?"
  
  I had no idea this girl was only 16 when I was talking to her, and as soon as I found out, I cut it off.
  
  So, I respectfully disagree with you.
  
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  - BlueJeansWhiteShirt
    
    11 years ago
    
    I understand at the time that you didn't know but it's the fact that you said she may be fun to hang round with.
    All in all, you did the right thing. Even if you did hurt her feelings slightly, she'll get over it. The times I have felt dejected when I were younger (even now actually) are countless. But that's life.
    
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- NocturnePonyFan
  
  11 years ago
  
  Uh, he DID stop.
  
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  - BlueJeansWhiteShirt
    
    11 years ago
    
    ...I know. Where did I say that he didn't?
    
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dom180

11 years ago

I would say you didn't do the wrong thing. I don't think 16 is necessarily too young for someone your age though. So long as you're sensible there's no reason why you'd get in trouble, even if she is *technically* underage.

At the risk of sounding a bit creepy, did she mention any places she likes to hang out or activities she likes to do? It would give you a good idea of where you might run into her again. I'm not suggesting you stalk her or anything like that (then you would get in trouble), but you might be lucky enough to see her again :)

Also, it's like Spacey said; it's easy to think you might have a really good connection with someone nice who you've only met once, but it probably wouldn't have been as great as it seemed. It's easy to have regrets, especially if she looked disappointed, but don't feel too down about it :)

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thank you for the advice dom180, I needed to hear that.
  
  She did tell me what street she lives on, but I think it would be pretty weird/stalker-ish to try and find her or something.
  
  I will just let it go I think. Maybe I will see her again, considering she lives rather close, but if not, then there is always other girls (and more 'age appropriate' ones at that).
  
  I am just glad to have some reassurance :)
  
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HeadMaster

9 years ago

It all comes down to "Risk vs. Reward".....She has nothing at risk, you have your entire life/future on the line. It would have been great if you had thought of a more gentle way to let her down, but it was "your gut" that saved you on this. Thank your parents for raising you right. Now keep in mind that I'm saying this assuming that 16yo is underage where you live (every state varies). If legalities are NOT an issue, then 20 vs. 16 might be a little young, but might not be....Your gut told you it wasn't right....at 20yo YOU need to start trusting your gut a lot more, it obviously has your best interest in mind :-) Thumbs Up, and double man points for doing the right thing....besides this girl might run across you again in a couple of years, Karma never sleeps

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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You done the right thing. Welldone.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thanks for the reassurance ItDuz.
  
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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You did well OP.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thanks Valkeer.
  
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Captain_Kegstand

11 years ago

I think you did the right thing, although you can learn from this example and handle it more delicately next time.

Either way, I am impressed that you were able to make the right judgment call and not try anything with her. So many people would have not made the good decision that you did!

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thank you Captain_Kegstand, I am glad to be reassured that I did the right thing.
  
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ucipher8

10 years ago

it was the right thing. But the gap isnt very big. Its a little dumb though, if she were 18 it probably wouldnt be a very big deal. While "teens" can still be very impressionable i find it very hard for any 20 year old these days to be "mature".

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  10 years ago
  
  Thanks, I still feel bad about it sometimes though. I don't know what that says about my personality. I've not seen her since, but I think about what happened now and again. I think about things like that often. Hard for me to let things go I suppose..
  
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ccjigsaw

11 years ago

I keep forgetting your legal age is 18 lololol If you lived in certain countries, that age gap would be nothing cause 16 is legal most places :P

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  That is curious.
  
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nobodyspecial

11 years ago

you neednt have dated her, 4 years is not a big age difference. You could have just been friends. In my country it would be perfectly legal to date a 16 yo and its common to find this.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  You are right, but I am looking for more than just a friend though, and I understand what you are saying too.
  
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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You did the right thing and her feelings were probably hurt but shes 16 she's probably forgotten about you already

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thanks, and you are probably right about her being over it already.
  
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REvEnGE

11 years ago

you were nervous thats for sure.,.its ok.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Thanks.
  
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Are You Normal?

Did i do the right thing?