Co-worker telling me i should have moved out by 18?

That lady needs to fuck right the Hell off!

It's okay to tell another person from work that you prefer not to discuss your personal life in the workplace with people you hardly know who are pretty much just acquaintances. The older I get the more I enjoy being a more private person, and the more I feel that people ought to mind their damn business.

There are plenty of people of different ages who live with their parents for all sorts of different reasons, and as long as those people, and their parents are living peacefully, and happily together without a lot of fighting, or other abusive dysfunctional behavior going on it's really no one's business.

If I were you I'd just steer clear of that nosy bitch. Fuck her, and the horse she rode in on! A lot of people have nothing better to do than gossip, and ask people about shit that ain't their business.

The ‘move out at 18’ thing is usually old timers thinking rent is still 1/8 of a starting wage.

I moved out at 18. I never went back. The main reason is that my parents were an abusive, dysfunctional mess and didn't want me around. It was unbearable being at their house, and once I had left, if I had come knocking on their door because I had fallen on hard times and needed to love back in for a little while, the answer would have been "No room, sorry". A night on the sofa may have been offered as a one off in a true emergency, but it would have been accompanied by lots of comments about me being a sponging waste of space who couldn't stand on my own two feet.

I struggled a lot. At some points I was homeless. Lived with a drug dealer boyfriend for a little while which got me into a huge heap of trouble. It was a hard road.

When I was in my late teens and 20s I used to raise an eyebrow at anyone who hung around at their parents house for any longer than they had to. I told myself it was because I was so independent and capable, but in reality I was just jealous. I didn't know what it was like to have a loving family who were actually happy to have their older children living with them until they had saved a house deposit or gotten married or whatever they were waiting for.

I don't expect my kids to move out at 18. If they want to then great, I will of course support that, but I won't pressure them into it. If they need a few years to find their feet then that's fine by me.

As long as you have your own long term plans, and your parents are happy for you to stay, then do whatever you need to. You don't need to prove something to the world. It's between you and your parents.

I'm pretty sure it's normal for old crabby patties to bitch about their lives & pretend they have it much, much worse.

Actually, I'm also pretty sure that young people bitch about their lives & pretend they have it much, much worse.

I guess people are miserable people

You know, my toe hurts. I don't think the younger generation respects that. Polar bear populations...declining. I don't like your sassy attitude.

She is rude and condescending. Probably been pretty privileged or lucky too. Many still live at home in their 20s, it's gotten increasingly expensive to move out and increasingly expensive to find apartments at least where I live but I dont think its just here. Jobs arent always easy to come across (at least great ones) unless you're very driven, not everyone is. We do our best with what we've got and it's not right of her to judge your situation like that. Could she have moved out as early as she did hadn't she found a man to move to? That's the question.

I had a similar situation at my work, they were more polite about it but said, “Oh, I REFUSED to move back to my parents after uni” as if living with this chaos is what I wanted. I finished uni at 21 with no job, no savings and no-one willing to let me crash at theirs for free, I could literally move back with my parents or be homeless.

I’ve been saving up ever since and was planning to move out this year but then... this happened. We will get away one day OP, keeping saving, keep believing.

Your colleague sounds like an oblivious idiot who doesn't have a clue about how things have changed over the last thirty years. I suppose you could challenge her to have a look at rents where you live and come up with a budget that would allow you to move out, but one of the most useful life skills one can develop is the ability to ignore the crap spewed by fools.

I also chose to leave home when I was 17. It wasn't that life with my mother and siblings was awful, I just wanted to have a place of my own. But that was in the early 1970s when, even though I was only earning just above minimum wage working on lawn maintenance, I could afford a comfortable three room apartment in a nice neighborhood. As it happens, I recently had a look at the current rent on apartments similar to the one I had in my home town (near Seattle), and there's no fucking way someone on minimum wage could afford to rent one and pay all the other normal, basic bills.

I could go on a rant about why I think the the current economic system in the USA - and the UK - is so totally borked that young adults are prevented from becoming independent by the cost of housing, but there'd be no point.

I think the best thing you can do is learn how to ignore the ill-informed, judgemental fool. Maybe she's one of those obnoxious people who deliberately annoys others because that's the only way they ever get any attention, and she's recognised that this is a sore point for you. You don't need to justify your life-choices or explain your personal finances to her. The only people you do owe something to are your parents for allowing you to continue to live at home, and it sounds like you're well aware of that.

The current times are different than the past; but in many ways very similar to long long ago.

For most of human history it was common for there to be 3 or 4 generations in the same household. It was the only thing that made economic sense for most of the population.

In general, the USA is reverting back to where it's less common for people to be able to support themselves at age 18 based on normal jobs. Yes there are a few, and yes some people need to move out due to abuse and other issues.

Please ignore her.... A simple rule I use when people make comments like this is: Are they willing to support me with what they are recommending. If yes (and they fork over the cash) - then I will listen to them (and I have in the past funded someone moving out until they could get financially stable). If they arn't willing to support you. Why should I listen to them?

Someone living with the parents isn't the most attractive thing in our culture. Then you open your mind and look at it from a new perspective. In a large part of the world you dont move out when 18. You live there for many years.

One if my coworkers from Africa told me the parents take care of the daughter till she's married then its the man's job. Look at Asian countries they don't have room for our life style youll have uncles kids and parents probably even grandparents all under one roof.

So don't let it get to you man.

You should move out whenever you need to don't have some random fucker tell you what to do.

She ought to mind her own business. Launching was much easier a generation ago. Rents and transportation was a lot cheaper, as well as education. There’s no comparison.

Well there are some people like my lazy worthless brother who does nothing and barely trys to get a job unless forced. He lives with my mom and I escaped my parents the minute I found a way out of that living hell. I did have a job there too but living with my mom meant money never belonged to me. It belonged to my mom. She could say "no you going to spend 500 on driving becuase I said so, not 200". I was tired off her trying to sabotage my job, and take all my money and be told "well its my house". But I have shitty parents and honestly there some people who cant afford live on thier own even at my current job I barely can.

18 is pretty young unless your going to college

Your coworker doesn’t understand inflation and the difficulty that you young people have now in being able to afford to do that.

this is why you dont talk about personal details in the workplace