Chooses weed over me. iin?

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I've been with my boyfriend for six years and for just as long I have had to deal with his addiction to weed, I dont want to sound like a hyprocrite i mean i smoke it too on occasion but this guy smokes it all day everyday, hes not happy unless he has some and even when he is running low hes almost impossible to deal with, He puts his need to smoke dope over our needs as a couple and our needs to survive, meaning he will spend all our money on dope instead of letting us have food heat prescriptions and i have gone with out a winter coat (in canada) for 3 years in a row yet he spends over 100bucks a week on dope and im tired of it I gave up working my last job because i was working 12 hours a day and he just ended up spending all his money on dope while mine went to bills and guess what more dope :(, He never wants to go out in public i havent been on a date in years and when we do have to go out he ends up telling off strangers (like screaming at them) because they are looking at me (crazy jealous) and to top it all off hes not only hooked on dope but coffee to he goes down to the coffee shop sometimes over 15 or more times a day ive even seen him go buy coffee at 3am, when i tell him i need to leave he freaks out and starts hitting himself and has punched holes thru walls... i know im not perfect but ive been trying for years to help him and i give up i am wasting my life away for a guy who doesnt even appreate me....i told him im ready to leave and hes telling me its cause im cheating on him over the internet and has nothing to do with his dope or any of the problems ive been trying to communicate to him over the years....... i know i need to leave... but i dont know how.. i dont know where to go..has anyone ever been thru this does anyone have any advice

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Based on 59 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • JUGASPSOC
    12 years ago

    What an ass! Leave him.

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  • graphic_nature
    12 years ago

    He's a loser and you've moved on. Line up a place to live, like your own cheap apartment, your parents, a friend's house temporary.. etc. and move out one day when he's gone, I know you say he doesn't like going in public but he must have to leave the house SOMETIME. Even if he's only gone a few hours, get some friends to get as much crap out as possible.

    Then break up with him through phone or note seeing as he could get violent. Let the landlord know whats going on or wait to break up when the lease is up. Do not tell him where you're going and change your contact information as soon as you're out. You sticking around and babying him is NOT helping him grow and and is going to give you ulcers.

    If he's not violent then just tell him you're going to move out and actually DO IT. Then drop off all contact. You staying after he's gotten extremely jealous and punched walls is basically giving him permission to always act that way. If you pay his bills and help pay for pot he will never learn to grow up and deal with reality. You already know what you have to do, now you need to find support and grow some balls to get it done.

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  • truckerpatrice
    12 years ago

    run away and never go back. Ever.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    He can go fuck his weed and shove it up his ass. He does not deserve you at all, he sounds like human waste. I'm sorry you wasted some of your life on him, but it's time to find a REAL man. Best of luck, hope he doesn't end up stalking you or whatever, he sounds seriously disturbed.

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  • Flaze
    12 years ago

    Do yourself a favour and dump his mooching ass, find someone who's worth being with.

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  • VsegdaTemnata
    12 years ago

    Dope is not weed.

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    12 years ago

    I think you already know the truth and know it's not normal.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    He is using the drug to self medicate himself for whatever reason he feels he needs to do that. Its the same thing as the alcoholic who wakes up with an empty beer can in his hand and immediately opens up a new one after waking up.

    It sounds as if his love affair with marijuana is more important then his relationship with you. Until he realizes that he will never get better. If you can help him realize that then you will both benefit from better communication. If he rejects what you would be trying to communicate to him then its time to move on.

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  • Dot123
    12 years ago

    He sounds like a fucking drug addict. I smoke weed every day for medical use. For back/body pain. Some people can smoke weed and act totally normal, others cant. But your bf sounds like he has a drug problem.

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  • red_gal_85
    12 years ago

    I know people can smoke dope everyday and function i also know not rolling joints and using bongs buckets whatever cuts back thats what hes been doing we still go thru a lot... hes not abusive to me in a physical sense and hes only name called a few times (not making an excuse my main problem is that my sister was murdered leaving a bad relationship and although i know that wont happen to me im scared of being on my own i guess)

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Not sure why women guilt themselves into staying. If that were my case I'd have never left my parents house (my mom would try to guilt me into staying).

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    • vitamello
      12 years ago

      Here's one explanation: The limbic system in our brains forms bonds to people that are somewhat impossible to break, regardless of how shitty the situation or relationship is. It happens to all people, not just women.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    You know that you can't save him... but you can save yourself!! If I were you, I wouldn't waste one more minute.

    I doubt he will stalk you coz that requires energy and the dope has robbed him of all motivation :o(

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  • piman
    12 years ago

    get away frm him

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  • equanimity
    12 years ago

    He has a problem and so do you as long as you are with him.

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