Brother's girlfriend living with us for almost 6 years

I've recently been quite troubled by this and was wondering whether others would find it as troubling as I do. To start, I'm a 19 year old girl with severe anxiety and depression, and I've recently finished high school and I quit my job due to my mental health (I have $4000 saved up, and I rarely spend it. I also have a Summer job). This does play a big part in this situation, so I'm not bringing it up for no reason. I have a brother who's 25 years old, and he dropped out of college around 5 years ago, and he took his girlfriend back with him. Both of them have been living with my parents and I ever since.

Now, let me emphasize the fact that she is the most lazy person I have ever met. In the 5 years she's been living here, she has never worked more than about 16 hours a week, and it currently only working about 9 hours a week. She has no other obligations aside from maybe emptying the dishwasher twice a week. Most of the money she gets from work is spent on fast food, soaps, beauty supplies, etc. She gets mad when my mom brings up the idea of looking for a job with more hours, or attending college or another post-secondary education. She is openly rude to my parents, and will talk badly about my father in his presence because he knows fighting back won't help, so he never says anything back. My mother is afraid to ruin her relationship with my brother (he get's incredibly aggressive whenever my mom talks about them moving out, or her possibly moving in with her father). Her mother is pretty unstable, but her dad has no issues and would allow her to live with him, so it's not like she needs to be here.

Just recently, I got into an argument with my brother and his girlfriend because they wouldn't drive me to take my cat to the vet when she fell and could no longer walk on her leg (this ended up being a torn ligament). They weren't busy or anything, they just didn't want to take her. This made me very upset, obviously, because our cat was howling in pain and they could care less, so I snapped at them and mentioned how lazy she was and how tired I was of their lack of respect for our family (more specifically, my brother's girlfriend). My brother's girlfriend then called me worthless for not having a job at 19, and she proceeded to tell me that I had less of a place in our household than her, because she pays rent ($200 a month... and she eats our food, uses our internet, MY Netflix account, and our shower).

At this point, I simply can't believe this is normal and I'd like to believe that I'm not crazy for thinking she should be out. Any opinions? Advice would be nice. After this event, my mom has been seriously considering just kicking her out, but I personally can't believe she hasn't been booted yet. I just don't think I can deal with this anymore, and my brother called me retarded and said that if I can't handle this, then I'm never going to make it in the real world. I can't be THAT crazy to think that she stepped out of line, but hell, maybe I am.

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Based on 30 votes (1 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • RoseIsabella

    Nope, they're deadbeats and a really bad example for you. I wouldn't be surprised if your brother and his lazy girlfriend were the main cause if your current anxiety and depression. Honestly, I think your parents ought to set some boundaries with those two with the implicit understanding that if they can't abide by the house rules they need to leave! I suspect your parents only put up with that chick because they're afraid of losing their relationship with your brother. Regardless of your employment status you should always be more welcome in your parents house than her, because you're their daughter, and she's just some stranger your brother brought home.

    One thang's for sho, I can't ever imagine denying a car ride to a feline in need! Gotta have yo priorities straight!

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    • HatefulBanshee

      Thanks, it's really nice to know that someone else shares the same opinion as me! I'll definitely be talking to my mom about it more. Hell, I would be able to bear it if she didn't live here, but I can never seem to find any escape from it, spare for a walk or two a day.

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  • Pure_Rage

    You guys really fucked up when you started taking her rent money, she has some what obligation to be there.
    Fuck your brother, he's a loser. I'm not telling you to cut your bonds, but you can't get rid of one with out the other.
    Your parents should've put their foot down after the first month. You don't move your girlfriend into your parents house, he should be moving out with his girlfriend.
    You can either team up with mom and kick them out, or let them stay and move yourself out eventually.. I'm still living with my bros girlfriends.. good luck.

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    • HatefulBanshee

      Well, if things truly don't work out, I'll probably end up joining the military and moving out. Sadly, this means that I'll have to stop taking my medication, which is a bit of a struggle at the moment, but it's the best path in terms of financial stability. He's a pretty blind guy, sadly. She has zero plans in terms of her future employment, and he for some reason believes that he'll be able to afford a high-end house on his salary alone. Thanks for your opinion!

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      • Pure_Rage

        Woah, your brother sounds just like mine !

        You shouldn't punish yourself because of them, unless joining the military is really what you want to do.

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  • Soapy_Testicles

    Severe anxiety and depression are not real mental health issues, you're just another example of lazy American youth who grew up with everything they needed provided for them. You've learned to use these things as an excuse to not be responsible for yourself. Same thing with your brother and his crappy girlfriend. Sounds as if your entire house is dysfunctional.

    I feel bad for your parents, having crap children like you and your brother probably wasn't the goal they envisioned 20 some odd years ago.

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    • HatefulBanshee

      Wow, there sure are a lot of social failures on this website! Well, I highly doubt I'm that much of a failure as you seem to be implying, seeing as I'm going for a bachelor in computer science and I held a full time job for two years before deciding that I wasn't in a stable position. I currently volunteer for 20 hours a week to make it out of the house, and I've been paying the vet bills for my mother to help her out with her financial issues.

      Ignorance is bliss, is it not?

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  • Champasama

    Well your dad seems like a fucking pussy to me, if he was a real man he would beat the fucking shit out of your brother and kick him the fuck out the house, like my dad would. Your brother is a fucking faggot btw. Well hope everything gets better with you, you shouldn't tolerate this mess.

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    • HatefulBanshee

      My dad feels guilty due to his parents kicking him out. My uncle despises my grandparents, and my father is afraid that the same thing will happen with my brother. I've been trying to help him out of that mentality, because it really isn't fair that he should have to live with someone so rude to him. My brother is a pretty big faggot though! Surprised he would put his own parents through so much. Thank you for your words!

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  • Poes

    Fuck off, your post was very boring!

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    • HatefulBanshee

      Why thank you!

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  • thegypsysailor

    Where is it your place to say who lives in your mom's house? If you don't like the arrangement, why don't YOU move out? You are over 18 and not only have a summer job, you have the money to get your own place.

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    • HatefulBanshee

      Well, maybe the fact that neither my mother nor father like her or are treated well by her. I have no issues moving off on my own, but my parents are afraid that once I go, I won't come back due to my reasons for leaving, and therefore my mom has stated that she would be unhappy with me moving out. Didn't read between the lines very well now, did you?

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