Bad father

13% Normal
15 Comments

Hey you guys, just wanted to let you in on what's been going on for the past few months. Well, it hasn't been very good. My dad's drug problems have gotten progressively worse. All he wants to do now is just stay home and get high. He's been using oxycodone multiple times a day. He has no interest in anything else, not even his work. He used to love his job, but now it's just an everyday struggle to even get up in the morning. Even when he comes home from work he's miserable.

That's not even the worse part.....

He's spending my money on the drugs. My money that is in my bank account for college has now become his personal drug money. He's spent about $1,500 on drugs in the past month and a half. I'm just freakin out at this point. He has no money in his bank account, we're a month behind on the mortgage and can barely the pay the rest of our bills.

I don't even like coming home anymore because he just makes me drive to my bank and take the money out of my account, sometimes even making me drive him to his drug dealers house. I'm just so afraid that he's gonna stop going to work and we will lose our home and I'll have to drop out of school. I don't know what to do. Worse case scenario, if we were to lose the house, I could just move in with my boyfriend, but I don't know what would happen with my dad.

Is this normal?

Voting Results
13% Normal
Based on 56 votes (7 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • Echoes
    13 years ago

    How old are you, and where's your mom??

    First, you need to find out what drove your father into this mess. You must check him in a rehab in a way or another.

    If you're too young, contact the social services. If not, find a friend or a relative to take care of the whole issue.

    The worst scenario, report your father and his dealer to the police, move in with your boyfriend and carry on with your life on your own and the college money.Most imprtantly, stay strong, don't let this thing get you, ok?

    Sometimes we have to take very painful decisions that can in short run hurt the ones we love, but will eventually have the result that's good for everyone.

    I'm sorry you're going through this.

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    • Chick2048
      13 years ago

      I'm 18, so I'm not sure if social services can do anything. And my mom is an irresponsible alcoholic, so she's no help at all.

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      • Echoes
        13 years ago

        Got relatives?? if yes, seek refuge there or move in with your boyfriend, but don't stay at home. I'm sorry to say you parents are no good for you.

        Again, stay strong, this terrible experience will make you a very strong person who can handle any problem. I know you're young, and I also know that you're smart enough to handle it.

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  • LAW13
    13 years ago

    The guilt you feel - the reason you come home- that's going to kill him. Stop being an enabler. Get help from school counselors, let them alert the authorities. And whatever you do- don't end up like him! Even if he spends all your college money, go to college and DO NOT end up like him.

    I never knew my dad well because he was addicted to drugs his whole life. I am 23 now and in college, I am so happy I am not going to be like my parents. And goddamnit, I don't have to take responsibility for their mistakes and their feelings. This is MY life. And yours is YOUR life.

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  • hugostiglitz
    13 years ago

    i am really sorry no one's around to stop him/help your personal situation. unfortunately i still think it's more normal than most of us would like to think (at least here in the states). move out and lead the productive life you want and need without him until he gets help

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    • Chick2048
      13 years ago

      Thank you all for the comments, they've really helped :)

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  • nocharge
    13 years ago

    Do you even have to ask if this is normal? Look for help and tell your dad that the only place you'll drive him if he doesn't get help is to the police station. That's the only way this will end.

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  • 8Serene8
    13 years ago

    I'd kick his ass until he kicked the drug habit.

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  • nohatingplz
    11 years ago

    You are lucky to only be involved emotionally at this point. I know it hurts, but you need to GET OUT before it eats you alive. Besides the current situation you are training yourself to live a codependent lifestyle with an addict. That behavior can follow you for life. Get into counseling hon and get outta there.

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  • TannTannDemon
    12 years ago

    I had a problem like this too but my dad was an alcoholic and my mom finally called the police when he flipped the coffee table over.

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  • penguin1
    13 years ago

    Stop giving him your money! You may not think so, but you're helping support his habit. What you need to do is get out and go to a close friend or family member. Then, you should call the cops, or get him into rehab or something. If things go on like this, it won't be helping anybody.

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  • LAW13
    13 years ago

    Okay if you're 18, get a job, at least part time. Live off student loans if you need to. But please go to college- it will be a refuge for you right now. If you can go to a state university- even better. Living around a campus is so fulfilling and exciting. You can easy get a counselor through the school or a sliding fee clinic. I'm sorry you're going through this. My concern is that his failures are going to pull you down using your guilt and sympathy. I know he's your father, but his actions have abandoned you. And look how far you've made it! You're 18. This is a really cool time of a persons life. Enjoy it

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  • hugostiglitz
    13 years ago

    btw I'm new to the site and don't know if there's personal messaging but if you want to talk to a total stranger who'll never judge and always listen you got my name

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  • MercedesBenz
    13 years ago

    I was in the same situation. My ending was te DEA busting in my childhood home and arresting my mom while my friends were over. Dont let that happen to you. It traumatized me regardless of how old I was at the time. It replays i my head over and over all the time. Get him some help before this turns into one of those situations. Call social services, call the tv show intervention. Do something. Good luck.

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  • randomjelly
    13 years ago

    Sweetie you HAVE to get out. Obviously being there with him isn't helping anyways. You're in danger.

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