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Is it normal to feel like no girl will want you for your personality? Like i know girls will accept and ugly guy for his personality, but i feel like mine isnt good enough.
Personalty is such a general term too... What defines you is your interests, the things you are good at, bad at, and how you treat others... If you don't let some girls in and share a bit of yourself, then you will always believe you have no personality ... I am with dappled (as usual).. Girls are more worried about what you are thinking of them!!
It is what's inside a man that defines his face.
But if he reveals his personality and the girl he likes does not like it, doesn't he have a valid reason for his so called insecurity?
You tell him to show his color to her, but she does not like that color. Now he has knowledge. He knows this girl and other girls that he wants will not like his color.
But those men whom girls like have no reason to be insecure. They have not felt insecurity because they know who they are and they know what other people like and how other people think. They have frequently tested their color to people and most are in favor of their color. Even though some are not in favor, he will not be insecure because he knows that in the past he has passed the test. He has proven to himself that girls like him.
You act like if he is insecure then his view is distorted. His view is not distorted, he is thinking clear. This feeling does not just pop up out of no where. There is an origin.
Very well put, and very accurate I like how you phrased it with the word "color", however I did not say his view is distorted, all I did was say what it was. And, its a common thing to be insecure with the oppisite sex, and its only through trial and errror that people learn how much color to show, and what kinds of people will appericate that color, we learn what color other people are. And, unless you are a total freaked out person, most likely you will find a person who will match your color to some degree or another.
Well I don't want to say it's normal because it's a defeatist attitude - but I think everyone feels that way at some point. You gotta stop thinking like that though.
My (unsolicited) advice is to be constructive, if there's something about yourself you don't feel good about work towards changing it instead of worrying about it. Would you still be "ugly" if you adopted a harder workout routine? Would your personality still be "bad" if you took some time to focus on the relationships in your life and how what you do affects them?
I don't mean to be presumptuous, I'm just speaking from personal experience, because I've felt that way and I wouldn't want to go back to feeling that way - and it was a long painful process to stop feeling that way. I obviously don't know your situation, so all I can do is hope that maybe some of this rings true for you.
A lot of people told me to just be confident. I felt like there was just some magic key that no one was telling me that could get girls to notice me. Well confidence wasn't just a switch I could turn on, but a culmination of a lot of experiences and a slow, committed change of attitude. And it turned out that even when I was chubby, plenty of girls still did notice me, I just took it for granted because I didn't feel good about myself.
Things don't change overnight, but you might feel better in the long run.
Feeling good about yourself, after all, is a great first step towards constant nookie.
Yeah its normal, for me at least. I'm ugly and I know it and I don't have any confidence. Don't think I'll ever get a girlfriend. =(
I just think you're being insecure. What you should do is that you should face our fear and just go up to one, show your personality and if they don't like it who cares? There are plenty of girls in the world aren't there?
Hope it helps! xD
Girls think exactly the same thing about themselves (and worse). We're all in it together and we're all the same.
You're insecure. I was too. A good cure is to flirt in a nearby city or a part of town you never go to. Yeah there's a chance I could look like an idiot but I don't care about what these strangers who'll never see me again think. Eventually I got comfortable around the opposite sex.