Attracted to friend

74% Normal
7 Comments

I am in love with my husband. He is wonderful man and a best friend. The problem is that we have a new best friend. He is our neighbor and I carpool with him 40 minutes to work together everyday. We also usually eat lunch with other co-workers or by ourselves. He and my husband have become very close. The three of us stay up drinking all night almost every weekend and he comes on weekend trips with us. For the last several months I have found myself attracted to him. It started with some dreams which refuse to cease, but I just tell myself that its not worth it, that he is just a friend. On times when I find myself really thinking about him,I have intentionally been "sick" on a few evenings so that I would not be out with them. I relish every time we really make eye contact and his touch, even so rare and not sexual in the least, burns right through my skin. I dream of him constantly. I find constantly wondering what his reaction would be to a kiss. My husband and I are moving to a different state for his job; he left today to start work. I have to finish up the week at my job. I will carpool with my neighbor and we have discussed celebrating my last day at the office one of the nights. We have invited other friends as well, but they are not dependable to show. Right now I have to physically stop myself from just showing up at his door and seeing what would happen. I got online to lookup resisting an affair, but wanted to see if I am normal. Oh god, I want to feel his touch.Tell me what to do.

Voting Results
74% Normal
Based on 58 votes (43 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • atmmstrs1
    15 years ago

    dont do it!

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  • Dillan
    15 years ago

    Hi
    This is always a risk when there is proximity over a prolonged period of time and you share your time and end up talking about personal day to day things. If you love your husband then stop seeing this neighbour. You need to control your feelings and remember time and again that there's only 1 man in your life and that'syour husband.

    I know because I have that temptationwith other women and I always try to think how my wife would feel, she's been there for me at all times, she deserves better.

    In the same way your husband deserves your full friendship , companionship and committment.

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  • andrian007
    14 years ago

    Imagine if your husband feels the same way you do towards this man except that he feels this for another woman. How would you feel?

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  • [Old Memory]
    15 years ago

    Forbidden fruit. I guess its normal to have feelings & be restless fantasize or be infatuated with someone, even when in a committed relationship. But get a grip.

    Is something missing from the marriage? That's worth checking.

    Whatever don't act on your randy hot-in-the-pants impulses. You've been smart to avoid doing so til now.

    Think. Is this something you'd do to someone you love & is your best friend? Imagine your guilt and self loathing after. Imagine the secretiveness of hiding it, or pain of disclosure.

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  • f4waysfallen
    15 years ago

    Real easy, move with your hubby and talk him into a threesome.

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    • nimbi
      15 years ago

      eww....

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  • awifewhohatessexandwantshelp
    15 years ago

    Hi...I am going through the same thing with a co-worker, too. I love my husband but our sex life sucks and all I can think about is what it would be like to be with my co-worker. He's in a less than happy relationship too and we do a lot of flirting.

    If you love your husband, move and don't look back. If there are problems in your marriage and then maybe your interest in your co-worker is a symptom. If so, moving might help for awhile but another symptom might arise.

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