As a 40-something-year old married man, what would you do?

YOu are asking if we the people think you should cheat on your wife.... Well, I am in an open relationship and let me put it this way: Can you honestly imagine your wife sleeping with a young, atractive, brunette, with bigger muscles and a better physical demeanor, a man you know that in your midlife, you could never take on in physical confrontation? Thats how you will make your wife feel. BTW this is called a midlife crisis. Buy a car, b/c midlife crisis dont last, and you can undo a bad buy, but not a broken relationship.

She could just be there attracted to you because you're taken. If you read a lot of stories on this website, you'll find that out. If you really want to be with this woman, well man up and take the necessary steps PROPERLY. Try to bring your spark back in your marriage, talk with your wife. Don't go cheating on her and doing things behind her back. If that doesn't work, divorce I guess. I personnaly think you should not leave your wife because you really can't know this young woman's true intentions. Anyways it's your life, you choose what's going to happen. I hope you won't regret anything.

Shoot myself for being a 40 year old man who peruses this pathetic website.

I find it very disturbing that anyone would click any one of those options that didn't begin with "STOP!".

I don't think it would be right for you to cheat on your wife if ever she did decide to make a move. Its really not worth it, unless you end the relationship you're already in with your wife. And you also need to keep your kids in mind. How do you think this would make them feel? How would it make them feel when their father drops the mother to have a fling with a 21 year old? If they're grown children, how the heck many years older than them is this 21 yr old? Could she be more like a sister? And what would your wife say?

Also, if the 21 year old were smart enough, she would know better since you clearly have a wife and 3 grown up children. She should stay away. Its not right.

Fuck that 21 year old pussy until it is a gooey quivering mass. Whatever you do don’t bust a nut.

Then, without showering or cleaning up in any way, find your wife and give her a good old fashioned mouth-pumpin’ as soon as humanly possible.
After you spray her throat with your DNA, ask her when the last time she tasted 21 year old pussy was. As she begins to respond interrupt her with “Wrong!!! You just did!”
It might sound a little extreme but trust me your wife will love it.

You're married. Man up and fuck your wife more, for christ's sake! America.

Please don't cheat on your wife and hurt your kids. I hope you can use this opportunity to re-kindle things with your wife. You have so many great years ahead with her. Do things like you did when you were courting her. Good Luck.

Hope you don't take the above statements seriously. (the stupid ones)

But as this is hypothetical. Imagine if you did have fun with that girl. Would you be able to live with the guilt that you cheated on your life and then would you have the guts to tell her, knowing that it break her apart?

If you have children that have grown up then you must have been married for quite some time. THe spark may be gone but you just need to rekindle it. Try new fantasies with her, different kinds of eex etc. There is really alot out there. You just need to get your needs met. The reason that your eyes are wandering is because you are not satisfied (obviously)

On another note. I don't think there is anything wrong with a guy at your age liking a girl at her age and vise versa. We can't help who we are attracted to etc.

But if i were you , i would hold onto the love that you have with your wife. And simply just spice up the bedroom with her.
Then all will be good :)

Friend, I know, i know...you would love to do her. BUT, unless you are in total denial, you KNOW better. Think of the 3 or 4 possible scenarios that you should know at your age. ALL of them end badly. Think about her when you jerk off and dont touch her. Ride the ego boost of her attention and leave it at that.

Hey man, enjoy life. This chick is a short term thing, once she realises that she needs to be with her own age group then you will be dropped. I say enjoy her, have a fling with her and when done just feel adventure completed. Stay quiet, enjoy life and all's well.

im 25 so i can tellyou i was 21 not that long ago and trust me her crush is just a crush and im sure it doesnt stop her from dating and living her life, and if you cheat on your wife with her it would ruin the relationship you have had for years (try to get that spark back thru roleplay toys whatever) but this 21 year old chances are will only get bored being with an older man (no offense im sure your a great guy its just true)

There is no such thing as cheating. Remember that.

Just play it by ear and see what happens.

you should totally start fucking the young chick.

I wouldn't go there unless you were single or the wife was into it. Have sex with your wife in public, or with another couple- not swapping, just sex at the same time, next to some friends you can trust... That's kinda hot, and I know ppl who do this and it really turns them on.

WTFE. You live once. There isn't a single organism that has monogamy in their DNA... why should we be different.

We were given conscious by evolution to evaluate the right and wrong. For the ones who cheat, well, you're nothing more than an animal up for doing an eager partner, like a dog.

You may have lost the spark during the long run, but sparks can be relit. Put some effort into it, dude. Court her like you two are back into the youthful times again, charm her, make her feel young, and a lovely wife would return the favor.

You married her because you love(d) her, right? I know love fades in time, and it definitely sucks that she was unfaithful before (my own girlfriend moped about her mistake for months). If she was sorry, and learnt her lesson, then there's no point in wanting payback. Love is supposed to be forgiving. For that time, you forgave her. So what, you're considering on taking the forgiveness back now? That'd mean you never did love her - which'll mean you let her waste her youth married to you.

It's good you aren't making a move. As a guy I understand the temptation, but think about your wife who was there for you through thick and thin for so many years.

Mann thats tough as a girl if i lost spark with my husband it would be really hard not to go for the other guy cuz girls get horny! I would say go for it if your wife dont wanna why would she care just dont make it so obvious! Dont end up on maury though! Make the first move but if you dont get a the right feeling flirt till you think you got her around your finger!

I think if you are going to get with this younger woman, you should break things off with your wife first.
But be sure she's worth it. I'm not proud of it, but I've been the "young woman" in this sort of situation before, and although the wife never found out, it ended messily.
The man was prepared to break things off with his wife for me, but although I liked him, I had no interest in a full-on relationship with him.

talk to the girl and tell her that your wife is in on everything i do so if she is interested in you she has to be able to talk with your wife about it also, if everybody can come up with a fair plan then you guys will have fun, cheating will kill your marriage and that is more important than any fling, always be open and honest in your relationships it will make everyone happy in the end.

If you fool around with her, you'll become really unhappy with your wife, and want to wander more. The male mind works that way, beauty and youth pretty much trump love and loyalty. The more status a male has, the more he is able to exploit this truth. So, unless you're a big hot shot, who can get more hot young things to chase, just stick to what you've become satisfied with.

I think you need to bring the spark back into your marriage, go back to what attracted you to your wife in the first place, maybe start going out on dates with your wife again. Get that spark back.

My dad had an affair, he ran away and he left us and believe me, it's something that stays with you. I didn't have any kind of relationship with my dad for 5 years and he still walks around with guilt....is it really worth it!? She's 21, her crush will end anytime between now and a year x

Well I, not being self-deceptive, would orchestrate my infidelity in such a way as to satisfy the girl's daddy fetish (because that's what it is), have my wife catch me and get all her repressed aggression out (because that's why half the spark is gone), leave the door open for make-up sex and a rekindling of the marriage, but plan for a new life of porking confused twenty-somethings.

I imagine one of your problems is that you don't want to feel old and tied to something that you have no pride in (the proverbial "mid-life crisis). So, barring infidelity, take up sea-diving, white-water rafting, mock spousal kidnappings for a romantic erotic picnic under the stars/dirty and sexy romp in a public bathroom, and so forth.

I did it with one of my female cousins good friends.

Fuck her

Whatever you do, remember to do it nicely. Think of the influence this action would have on everyone in the situation.

My wife has cheated on me before, years ago but we worked through it. I never really thought of getting my own back until now because of this girl.
And thanks for all your replies so far, but this is hypothetical; like I said, I don't think she will make sexual advances on me, I'm just asking what others would do, in my position, if she did. I wouldn't make a move on her first anyway - can you imagine if she refused and told everyone about it?

and if she didn't like you...? You'd be in the shit

She cheated on you and you stayed with her.

Cheat on her, and see if she stays. At the very least, it'll answer a few unasked questions.

Also, for the record, I would like to state this one simple fact, and I will do so henceforth: get some, old dude. You only have the one life. Hit it, quit it.

Tell your wife that you would like to take a mistress you will still provide her with financial and emotional support and that you will make love with her but either she needs to start putting out more often or you will f*** her when she lets you but you will be schtuping this other girl too.

The gene pool is diverse because of sexual attraction. I'm a woman, I tell you if a 21 year old good looking friend of my sons' came on to me, I wouldn't be able to resist. No harm would be done unless husband or wife found out.